“You think I'm gonna feel better eatin' a carrot? Get a grip. There's two idiots out there trying to kill me, and you think I'm gonna waste my last breath on a vegetable? (Lula)”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“There were two doors that opened off the hallway. The doors were labeled PUSSY and MOTHERFUCKERS.
"I'm taking the Motherfuckers door," I said to Ranger.
"No way. That's my door."
"Well, I'm sure as hell not taking the Pussy door.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“You don't have a drop of paint on you," I said. "Why is that?"
Ranger smiled, liking that he hadn't gotten hit. "I guess they were hunting pussy."
"But I walked into the Motherfuckers room."
"Yeah, but babe, your clearly pussy.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“I was waiting for my body receipt when Morelli walked in. He nodded to Ranger and grinned at me in my whiteness.
“I was at my desk, and Mickey told me I had to come out to take a look,” Morelli said.
“It’s floor,” I told him.
“I can see that. If we add some milk and eggs, we can turn you into a cake.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“Do you have someone watching her house?” (Stephanie)
“That kind of surveillance only happens in the movies. We’re so underbudgeted we’re one step away from
holding bake sales to pay for toilet paper. (Morelli)”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“I don't feel so good." Lula said. And she farted.
She squeezed her eyes shut tight and did a full minute-long fart. "Excuse me." she said.
I was horrified and impressed all at the same time. It was a record breaking fart. On my best day, I couldn't come near to farting like that.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“There are four ways to manage stress. There's drugs, there's alcohol, there's sex, and there's doughnuts. I go with sex and doughnuts. I tried the other two and it wasn't any good. You being in a dry spell, you might have to rely on doughnuts.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“You know what your problem is? You got too many scruples. One or two is okay, but you get too many of them, and it clogs everything up."
What she said made no sense at all, but was probably right.
"I got some scruples," Lula said, "but I know when to stop. There's a point where you have to say enough is enough and screw scruples.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“Connie drove a silver Camry with rosary beads hanging from her rearview mirror and a Smith& Wesson stuck under the seat. No matter whatwent down, Connie was covered.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“He's hot, Lula said, but he's a pig. All men are pigs.
Do you really believe that?
No but it's a point of view to keep in mind . You don't want to go around thinkin' shit is your fault. Next thing you know, they got you makin' pot roast ad you're cutting up your mastercard.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“Sounds to me like you're talkin' about the wrong things. Why don't you talk about other things? Like you could make a list of things you won't fight over and then you only talk about those things.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“I don't want a new man."
"I'll be dead someday," my mother said. "And then what? You'll wish you had someone."
"I have a hamster.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“One minute I was having a day like any other , and then Whack an this guy didn’t have no head“ Lula Finger Lickin 15”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“Ranger was the second biggest complication in my life, and now that Morelli was out of the picture, I supposed Ranger was elevated to numero uno. He’s close to six foot, one way or the other, is Latino, with medium brown skin and dark brown hair cut short. His teeth are white and even, and he has a killer smile that is seen only on special occasions. He dresses in black, and today he was wearing a black T-shirt and black cargo pants.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“Every man in my organization knows you and understands that you’re my personal property,”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
“I can’t help it. I’m just a big gasbag. I still got leftover barbecue gas.” She squeezed her eyes shut tight and did a full minute-long fart. “Excuse me,” she said.”
― Janet Evanovich, quote from Finger Lickin' Fifteen
Janet Evanovich
Born place: in South River, New Jersey, The United States
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“You must make certain to give your subconscious only suggestions, which heal, bless, elevate, and inspire you in all your ways. Remember that your subconscious mind cannot take a joke. It takes you at your word.”
― Joseph Murphy, quote from The Power of Your Subconscious Mind
“I wasn’t destined to be an astronaut. I had to turn myself into one.”
― Chris Hadfield, quote from An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth
“Every great magic trick consists of three parts or acts. The first part is called "The Pledge". The magician shows you something ordinary: a deck of cards, a bird or a man. He shows you this object. Perhaps he asks you to inspect it to see if it is indeed real, unaltered, normal. But of course... it probably isn't. The second act is called "The Turn". The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it do something extraordinary. Now you're looking for the secret... but you won't find it, because of course you're not really looking. You don't really want to know. You want to be fooled. But you wouldn't clap yet. Because making something disappear isn't enough; you have to bring it back. That's why every magic trick has a third act, the hardest part, the part we call "The Prestige".”
― Christopher Priest, quote from The Prestige
“This, children, is Kitty Pryde, who apparently feels the need to make a grand entrance.
I'm sorry. I was busy remembering to put all my clothes on.”
― Joss Whedon, quote from Astonishing X-Men, Volume 1: Gifted
“Some aspects of language acquisition are puzzling: Children almost always learn to say no before yes and in before on, and all children everywhere go through a phase in which they become oddly fascinated with the idea of “gone” and “all gone.”
― Bill Bryson, quote from The Mother Tongue: English and How It Got That Way
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It's Called a Breaku...BookQuoters is a community of passionate readers who enjoy sharing the most meaningful, memorable and interesting quotes from great books. As the world communicates more and more via texts, memes and sound bytes, short but profound quotes from books have become more relevant and important. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author’s best ideas.
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