Quotes from Sandman Slim

Richard Kadrey ·  388 pages

Rating: (28.7K votes)


“Did I hurt your feelings again? Sorry. When this is all over I'll send some flowers to your inner child.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Try not to sing too many sad songs for yourself. The universe already hates you. Self-pity isn't going to help.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“When you jump off a cliff, is it better to land on jagged rocks or burning lava? I know this one. The answer is obvious: It doesn't matter where you land. You just jumped off a cliff.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“We must always look after our friends, even when they are foolish. Especially when they are foolish.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“I'm steel-toed boots in a ballet-slipper world.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



“No hospitals, she says.
I know.
Where are we going?
For ice cream. What's your favorite flavor?
Fuck you.
That's my favorite, too.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“When you're facing down multiple attackers, you always want to make the first move. It lets them know that you're ready to fight and that you're crazy enough to get the party started. One rule of thumb in fighting is that crazy can often overcome skill and numbers, because, while a trained fighter might actually enjoy going up against another trained fighter, no one really wants to wrestle with crazy. Crazy doesn't know when it's winning. And crazy doesn't know when to stop. If you can't pull off crazy, if, for instance, you're handcuffed in a small van with six armed assailants, stupid is a decent substitute for crazy.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Revenge is never what you think it's going to be. There's no pleasure and glory, and when it's done your grief remains. Once a man does the things you're talking about, he will never be the same, and he can never go back to who he was before. Worst of all, no matter how many enemies you kill, you are never satisfied. There is always one more who deserves it. When it becomes too easy to kill, it never ends.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“That's what Glocks are. High-precision killing machines that scream "Daddy Issues.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“I came ready to fight Genghis Khan and I walk in on a shut-in playing the biggest Dungeons and Dragons game in history.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



“Besides Getting my ass kicked, my main accomplishment on this trip has been to massacre an incredible number of completely innocent clothes. I'm the Joseph Stalin of laundry.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“If I learned anything Downtown, it's this: the only real difference between an enemy and a friend is the day of the week.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“I tap a Malediction out of the box, fire it up, and puff. It tastes like a tire fire in a candy factory next door to a strip club. The best cigarettes ever.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“The ashes of your existence will fertilize the soil for the universe to follow.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“*For eleven years, I've been worked over and abused in ways you can't imagine by things you don't want to know about. I've killed every kind of vile, black-souled, dead-eyed nightmare that ever made you piss your pjs and cry for mommy in the middle of the night. I kill monsters and, if I wanted, I could say a word and burn you to powder from the inside out. I can tear any human you ever met to rages with my bare hands. Give me one good reason why I could possibly need you?
*She looks straight at me, not blinking. No fear in her eyes.
*Because you might be the Tasmanian Devil and the Angel of Death all rolled into one, but you don't even know how to get a phone.
*I hate to admit it, but she has a point.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



“...playing with the Barbie-size keyboard on my new phone. Phones are like toys now. They fit in your pocket, light up and vibrate like joy buzzers. Plus, you can get-I mean, "access"-the Internet and find anything you want. Music. Maps. Porn. Anything. If cell phones came with a cigarette dispenser, they'd be the greatest stupid invention ever.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“I'm trying very hard not to think about anything I'm doing. Of all the iffy things I've ever done in my life, I've never had to ditch a body before. While it's giving me a migraine right now, I think the fact that I'm not an expert on corpse disposal says a lot of good things about me and my life choices.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“If Donald Trump and the Wicked Witch of the West had a kid, it would be Jayne-Anne. She looks like a librarian with some money and good taste in clothes but underneath the Verace, she's Godzilla with tits.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“There’s the opposite of love at first sight. There are people walking the earth that the moment you meet them, you want to punch them and keep punching them.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Fuck you, angel. Fuck you and all God's little prison bitches. He slips you some cigarettes and a con job smile and you run off to do his dirty work for him. Go and scare some sinners. No one's listening to you here.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



“See? Even dead she makes me a better whatever-the-hell it is I am. A less stupid person. A more considerate monster.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Thanks for treating me like, you know, a person through all this shit. I know that isn't always easy. (Stark)
You do have a habit of pissing on other people's welcome mats. But, when a gentleman gives you a booty call to a massacre, it's easy to forgive. Ciao. (Candy)”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Love a man who'll bleed to make a point. (Candy)”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“THERE’S ONLY ONE problem with L.A. It exists. L.A. is what happens when a bunch of Lovecraftian elder gods and porn starlets spend a weekend locked up in the Chateau Marmont snorting lines of crank off Jim Morrison’s bones. If the Viagra and illegal Traci Lords videos don’t get you going, then the Japanese tentacle porn will.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Now you are thinking like a thief. Fewer guns and more exits. We'll cure your cowboy ways yet. (Vidocq)”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



“My head is full of monsters and I’m one of them.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Another scar or two won't ruin my pretty face."
"Right."
"Carlos, are you being polite? That's not why I came here for. I know I'm not Steve McQueen."
"My lady is totally in love with him. Lucky for me he's dead or I'd be in trouble."
I hold up my glas of Jack Daniel's in a toast. "Here's to all the guys better looking than us. May they all die first.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Fortunately, I’m good at ignoring a lot of what my brain does.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“There's something magical about the sound of breaking glass. Especially around a mob. It works both for humans and Hellions. If you want to start a riot, throw a bottle.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim


“Young man, there are some things in the world so profane that their only real value is in not knowing about them.”
― Richard Kadrey, quote from Sandman Slim



About the author

Richard Kadrey
See more on GoodReads

Popular quotes

“I turned. Tall, Dark, and Sinister was rapidly approaching.”
― MaryJanice Davidson, quote from Undead and Unwed


“FACT The Native Americans invented the game lacrosse.”
― Lynne Reid Banks, quote from The Indian in the Cupboard


“A life isn't measured in hours and minutes. It's the quality, not the length.”
― Gabrielle Zevin, quote from Elsewhere


“He’s not the first to say that.”
― Michael Grant, quote from Plague


“That's one form of magic, of course."
"What, just knowing things?"
"Knowing things that other people don't know.”
― Terry Pratchett, quote from Equal Rites


Interesting books

The Nicomachean Ethics
(27K)
The Nicomachean Ethi...
by Aristotle
Every Dead Thing
(17.7K)
Every Dead Thing
by John Connolly
Those Who Save Us
(80K)
Those Who Save Us
by Jenna Blum
Wonderstruck
(46.6K)
Wonderstruck
by Brian Selznick
Martin the Warrior
(37K)
Martin the Warrior
by Brian Jacques
Shopaholic & Baby
(109.5K)
Shopaholic & Baby
by Sophie Kinsella

About BookQuoters

BookQuoters is a community of passionate readers who enjoy sharing the most meaningful, memorable and interesting quotes from great books. As the world communicates more and more via texts, memes and sound bytes, short but profound quotes from books have become more relevant and important. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author’s best ideas.

We thoughtfully gather quotes from our favorite books, both classic and current, and choose the ones that are most thought-provoking. Each quote represents a book that is interesting, well written and has potential to enhance the reader’s life. We also accept submissions from our visitors and will select the quotes we feel are most appealing to the BookQuoters community.

Founded in 2023, BookQuoters has quickly become a large and vibrant community of people who share an affinity for books. Books are seen by some as a throwback to a previous world; conversely, gleaning the main ideas of a book via a quote or a quick summary is typical of the Information Age but is a habit disdained by some diehard readers. We feel that we have the best of both worlds at BookQuoters; we read books cover-to-cover but offer you some of the highlights. We hope you’ll join us.