“If a girl has baby wipes in her house, but no baby—I’d say she will most likely be down to let you put it in her ass. “I”
“I wondered if there would ever come a time in my life where I wouldn't measure distance by the amount of time it would take for a person to physically come on to me.”
“This one girl here, Devon, she’s from Detroit. She’s brand-new too. One day I was about to leave to the grocery store, which is like a ten-minute walk away. She asked me to pick up a sandwich for her (which was kind of annoying), so I was like, “Why don’t you come with me?”
She was like, “I can’t, ’cause I can’t walk very far.”
I was like, “It’s not even ten minutes. Come on, don’t be lazy—if anything it’ll be a mini workout.”
She was like, “Ever since I got shot, it hurts when I walk uphill.”
(The walk on the way back is pretty much all on an incline.)
I asked her why she got shot. I thought . . . Detroit? Ghetto, right? Probably domestic abuse, or a drug-related thing.
She goes, “I got in a fight over a parking space, and the guy shot me in both of my knees.”
“But life is too short to masturbate silently,”
“It just goes to show you—for every woman you jerk off to, there’s a tired husband/boyfriend/significant other jerking off to some other bitch. October”
“I think I’ll go to yoga to clear this negative energy before today’s orgy scene. I wanna go in with a positive attitude. November”
“At twenty years old, I was the youngest one at the dungeon, but not by much. No one was over thirty. The head bitch in charge was Mistress Rox. She had been there for eight years, and was known in the city as one of the meanest, baddest, yet most sensual masters. I’ve seen her shit on a guy. Like, right on his face. There’s no way he didn’t get pinkeye from that. You can’t erase things like that from your memory, no matter how much you want to. It’s like herpes in your brain. It’s forever.”
“I'm mortal. You really don't want me falling down stairs and breaking my neck." "I'd catch you," he assured her solemnly. "I'll always be there to catch you, Inez.”
“What the hell were you doing at the Hurrah? You won't find a date there, none of them are into chicks.”
“Other generations perceived a plethora of swords hanging over their heads. But generally what they feared were shadows, for neither they nor their gods could actually end the world. Fate might reap an individual, a family, or even a whole nation, but not the entire world. Not then.
We, in the mid-twenty-first century, are the first to look up at a sword we ourselves forged, and know, with absolute certainty, it is real...”
“That's the claim. The Arl and the Prince, both killed at West Hill." she glanced at Maric, crooking one corner of her mouth in grim amusement. "Apparently your body was not distinguishable from those of regular Fereldan men and thus couldn't be found, according to the usurper."
"Well that's just rude.”
“Sometimes I think about the trees and the mountains and how long they've been here. Much longer than I've been alive, and they'll be here long after I've gone. It makes you realize how small you are in the scheme of things, what little impact you have on the world. It's part of the reason why I'm doing what I'm doing this weekend, to make an impact. To know I might have made a difference, even if it was a small one.”
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