Losing Hope

But I’ve learned over the past year what it really means to be able to miss someone. In order to miss someone, that means you were privileged enough to have them in your life to begin with.

I wonder if it's possible for people to fall in love with a person one characteristic at a time, or if you fall for the entire person at once.

All those nights you held me and just let me cry . . . you have no idea how many times you’ve already saved me.

I've loved Hope since we were kids. But tonight? Tonight I fell in love with Sky.

But I'm not falling in love with her piece by piece anymore. I'm in love with the whole girl. Every single piece of her.

What you want to do tonight? I read Daniel's text and respond. Sorry. Plans. WTF, puss flap!? No! Me. You. Plans. Can't. Pretty sure I have a date. Sky? Yep. Can I come? Nope. Can I be your date next Saturday, then? Sure, babe. Can't wait, sugar.

I don't want her to feel nothing when I kiss her. I want her to feel everything.

Fuck all the firsts, Sky. The only thing that matters to me with you are the forevers.

In order to miss someone, that means you were privileged enough to have them in your life to begin with.

I'm gonna go live my life now, Les. A life I'm actually able to look forward to, and I'd honestly thought I'd never be able to say that. Then again, I'd honestly thought I'd always be hopeless, but I find hope every single day.

I can't explain to you how perfect this girl is. And when I say perfect, I mean imperfect, because there's just too much wrong with her. But everything wrong with her is everything that draws me in and makes her perfect.

I’m pretty sure it’s too soon to love her, but shit. She’s got to stop doing and saying these unexpected things that make me want to fast-forward whatever’s going on between us. Because I want to kiss her and make love to her and marry her and make her have my babies and I want it all to happen tonight

Time has completely stopped, and all I'm thinking about while we kiss is how this is what saves people. Moments like these with people like her are what make all the sufferings worth it.

I used to think the best part of me died with Les, but the best part of me is standing right here in front of me.

...And I'm not ready to tell you I'm in love with you, because I'm not. Not yet. But whatever this I'm feeling - it's so much more than like...And for the past few weeks I've been trying to figure it out. I've been trying to figure out why there isn't some word to describe it. I want to tell you exactly how I feel but there isn't a single goddamned word in the entire dictionary that can describe this point between liking you and loving you, but I need that word..." "Living,"she finally whispers. "I live you, Sky...I live you so much.

You did everything you could, but sometimes all the love in the world from mothers and brothers isn't enough to help pull someone out of their nightmare. We just need to accept that things are what they are, and all the guilt and regret in the world can't change that.

Wait, wait, wait," Breckin says, interrupting the story. "You called her Cinderella? What the hell for?" Daniel shrugs. "We were in a janitor's closet. I didn't know her name and there were all these mops and brooms and shit and it reminded me of Cinderella, okay? Give me a break.

I call her Val because it's short for Valium and I always tell her she needs to take that shit by the bucketful. I wasn't lying when I said she was fucking crazy.

What time should I come stalk you tomorrow?” “Six-thirty?” She says breathlessly. “Six-thirty sounds good.” Six-thirty is my new favorite time of day.

But everything wrong with her is everything that draws me in and makes her perfect. She’s flat-out rude to me and I love it. She’s stubborn and I love it.

Devastated should be reserved for mothers

I didn't just live her. I love her. I've loved her since we were kids.

You would think a person could only die once. You would think you would only find you sister's lifeless body once. You would think you would only have to watch your mother's reaction once after finding out her only daughter is dead. Once is so far from accurate. It happens repeatedly. Every single time I close my eyes I see Les's eyes. Every time my mother looks at me, she's watching me tell her that her daughter is dead for the second time. For the third time. For the thousandth time. Every time I take a breath or blink or speak, I experience her death all over again. I don't sit here and wonder if the fact that she's dead will ever sink in. I sit here and wonder when I'll stop having to watch her die.

As soon as the words leave her mouth, I'm completely consumed by a sense of peace. For the first time since the second she was taken away from me, I finally know what forgiveness feels like.

Just seeing her again, even from a distance, reminds meof why I crave to be around her so much. It’s only been a few days, but since the moment I met her, no matter where I am, I’m constantly wondering about her. My attention is constantly homed in on her like I’m a compass and she’s my North.

I dip my head and kiss her. I kiss her like she deserves to be kissed. I hold her like she deserves to be held. And I'm about to make love to her like she deserves to be loved.

I don’t remember what it’s like to care enough about life that the thought of death could destroy me

As soon as my fingers graze her skin, chills rush down her arms. She tightens her arms over her chest and rubs the chills away. I can’t help but grin, knowing it was my hand on her skin that did that to her. Best. Feeling. Ever.

My attention is constantly homed in on her like I'm a compass and she's my North.

I want to kiss her so fucking bad but I’m too scared. I’m scared if I kiss her too soon, it’ll feel like every other kiss she’s ever received. She’ll feel nothing. I don’t want her to feel nothing, when I kiss her. I want her to feel everything.