Thoughtful

She was comfort and pain, wrapped up in one beautiful package…that wasn’t mine.

I have a life without you. You’re not my entire world. You’re just the part I loved the most…

And you?” she asked. “What happens to you in that scenario?” I die a little each day we’re apart. “I…get by. And I miss you, every day.” Every hour, every minute…every second.

There was only one thing I could think of that wouldn’t fade, break, or shatter. I could have her with me every second of every day. I could carry her, on my skin, seared into my flesh…permanently.

I’m in love with you. You gave yourself to me, then ran right back to him. You. Killed. Me.

I love you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. The women…I was so scared to touch you. You didn’t want me…I couldn’t take the pain. I tried to get over you. Every time with them, I was with you. I’m so sorry…I love you.

Because I was head-over-heels, ends-of-the-earth, till-death-do-us-part in love with her.

Only think about the raindrops. Only listen to the sound of the rain pelting the earth. Only feel the chill. Don't think about her. Don't think about her lips. Don't think about her body. Her smile. Her laugh. Her eyes...the way she looks at you. The way she looks at him. Fuck.

I’m so in love with you, Kiera. I’ve missed you so much. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I say awful things to you. I’m sorry I lied about your sister…I never touched her. I promised you I wouldn’t. I couldn’t let you know…how much I adore you…how much you hurt me.

Thank you.” Thank you for ripping my heart out. Thank you for showing me something I can never have. Thank you for looking so beautiful this morning, it makes me want to tear my eyes out.

Oh. My. God…yes. I cried out in the same way she did. We needed this. We needed each other. Please, Kiera. Say yes.

I looked up at her, relieved. I’d get to keep her. At least for today, I’d get to keep her.

She was the biggest fucking whore I knew. And I knew a lot of whores.

She was my greatest pain, and my only salvation. She was the only one who could heal this hole in my heart, a hole she’d torn open." Kellan Kyle

Well, then you’re a moody artist.” Under her breath, she added, “You’re practically a girl.

You were the biggest mistake of my life, Kellan. You were right—we’re not friends, never were. I wish you would just go away.” I felt like she’d just reached into my chest and squeezed my heart until it burst open in her hands. Her words hurt me more than anything I’d ever heard before, and I’d heard some pretty shitty things in my lifetime. This was worse than anything my father had ever said or done to me. It was worse than hearing her have sex with Denny five seconds after me. This…destroyed me.

Kiera was a scar across my heart that would never fully heal, no matter how many random encounters I placed across it. My poor imitations of her were only ripping open the wound again and again. Good or bad, she was forever a part of me." Kellan Kyle

Do you think loving you has ever been easy for me…or even sometimes pleasant?

I can't lose her. Please, God, don't let me lose her. I need her. I'll do anything. We'll end this charade, we'll go back to being purely just friends. Just don't take her away from me tonight.

With a sad smile, I ran my fingers down her door. “It doesn’t matter what you wear…you’ll be stunning. As much as you want to, you can’t hide your beauty, Kiera.

I just... wanted to help her. I wanted to return her stuff and give her a ride home so I'd know she was safe. I just wanted her safe. And happy.