“This book is for everyone who has survived. You are not broken. You can love and be loved, despite what may feel like the eternally brutal nature of the world. Even when you're drowning and so far under, there is always time to reach for someone who will teach you how to breathe again.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“It’s smart to end relationships that are poisonous. It’s a good thing. Sometimes you have to cut people out of your life to make things better. So you can move forward.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“We don't have to know everything. If you believe in fate and some kind of meaning and sense in this fucked-up world, then believe with abandon, love. Enjoy it.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“You need songs that make you feel. Some make you string, some make you weak. Some build determination, some tear you apart. But you need all of those...Run through the pain.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Your parents died. Your world fell apart."
I nod.
He puts his hand on my cheek. "You were left drowning"
I nod again.
"And you're struggling to breathe"
I am. It's a constant struggle to stay near the surface I have just enough air to stop me from going totally under, but not enough to thrive.
"So do it. Breathe. Just Breathe." He turns up the volume and strokes my hair.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“What are we doing? What are you doing?”
“Loving you,” he says simply. “If you’ll let me.”
“Always. God, always.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“He leans into me and kisses me again. Harder this time. He tastes like eternity, and healing, and completion.
No one else could ever kiss me like this, of that I am positive.
I could breathe in him forever.
I could fall in love forever.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“You have the here and now. You have a future. Deal with the past so you can stop looking back. It's just the pain.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“I see perfection in things that are likely considered imperfections by others.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Being with you let me feel, feel everything, and I needed that. I remembered better with you, I healed better with you, and you made … you made everything real.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“At least one thing is certain: Chris and I are inextricably connected. Do I have factual reasons to know this? Proof? Assurances? No None.
Some people believe in God; I believe in Chris.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Shut up" he says teasingly. "I know what you're thinking, and that's not why you're here with us"
We walk for a minute. "Why am I?"
Sabin shrugs. "Does there really have to be an answer to that? Sometimes it's just right. You fit. Jesus, kid, can't you feel it? Don't question everything."
I smile. I do feel it. Belonging.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“I want my mother right now. I want her so desperately that I physically ache to have her hold me, and it's absolutely bullshit that I have no one.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“So I have spent four years without touch and affection and without wanting any.
But now there is Christopher Shepherd, the boy who changed all the rules.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“It wasn’t me?” I snap. “That’s got to be the goddamn dumbest thing you’ve ever said to me. You’re way too smart to say something like that. Don’t be such an asshole.”
“Okay, yes. It was you.”
“Awesome. That’s great to hear.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Reality is not necessarily my friend—then again, neither are dreams—but this moment, this reality, is beautiful.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Chris may be imperfect, and he makes mistakes, but I can feel his heart, and I know that he is mine.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Where in the goddamn hell are Blythe and Chris?”
…
“They’re fucking in the shower! Thank you, Lord!”
Then her heels continue down the walkway while a collective round of applause echoes into the now-dark sky.
“Congratulations! But hurry it up, kids! Dinner is almost ready.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“We run through the remnants of our pain, and more importantly, we run for our present and for our future.
Together we kick heartbreak's ass.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“There is no time frame that dictates when and how you’ll feel what you feel. You just get to deal with hell however, and whenever, it hits you.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“What’s happenin’, the cakest of all my baby cakes?”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“So I add frigid to the list. To that stupid mental inventory I try so hard not to keep. An increasingly large list of all my flaws. My inadequacies. My failures.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“I am hit with the enormity of the impact that this family is having in my life. They, and mostly Chris, are saving me. Or teaching me to save myself.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“I’ve read countless literary works that detail the longing and ache that characters have for someone they love, and over time, I have developed a strong belief that it’s just dramatic bullshit meant to entice readers.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“you're just....You're everything"
His words are perfect, but the tone in his voice is not right. Wistful. Apologetic.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“So stay."
It seems to take forever for him to answer, and his hands are still playing with my hair, his lips still darting against mine every few seconds. "I can't" He steps back and takes my hand to move me out of the way of the door. "I'd give anything to stay, but I can't. You're stunning, Blythe." He gives me an almost-sad smile. "But I just can't stay. It's too much.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Everything about her shredded my heart because she reminded me too much of my mother, and she reminded me too much of my mother's death. I couldn't handle it. And so I pushed her away.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“I imagine that anyone who goes through trauma like I have wonders the same things I do: how God can exist and allow such awful things to happen. There are no reasons for my parents' death, and that's that.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“One thing has become crystal clear to me overnight: I have never felt as close to anyone as I do to Chris. It is not from the amount of time we've spent together, but from the strength of the unquestionable bond we share.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
“Some people believe in God; I believe in Chris.”
― Jessica Park, quote from Left Drowning
Jessica Park
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“The tragedy of puppies, taken from their families, all of them, never to see each other again. This is the sadness we inflict on the beasts we love.”
― Carolyn Parkhurst, quote from The Dogs of Babel
“A small town has as many eyes as a fly”
― Sonya Hartnett, quote from Surrender
“. . . waves of desert heat . . . I must’ve passed out, because when I woke up I was shivering and stars wheeled above a purple horizon. . . . Then the sun came up, casting long shadows. . . . I heard a vehicle coming. Something coming from far away, gradually growing louder. There was the sound of an engine, rocks under tires. . . . Finally it reached me, the door opened, and Dirk Bickle stepped out. . . .
But anyway so Bickle said, “Miracles, Luke. Miracles were once the means to convince people to abandon reason for faith. But the miracles stopped during the rise of the neocortex and its industrial revolution. Tell me, if I could show you one miracle, would you come with me and join Mr. Kirkpatrick?”
I passed out again, and came to. He was still crouching beside me. He stood up, walked over to the battered refrigerator, and opened the door. Vapor poured out and I saw it was stocked with food. Bickle hunted around a bit, found something wrapped in paper, and took a bottle of beer from the door. Then he closed the fridge, sat down on the old tire, and unwrapped what looked like a turkey sandwich.
He said, “You could explain the fridge a few ways. One, there’s some hidden outlet, probably buried in the sand, that leads to a power source far away. I figure there’d have to be at least twenty miles of cable involved before it connected to the grid. That’s a lot of extension cord. Or, this fridge has some kind of secret battery system. If the empirical details didn’t bear this out, if you thoroughly studied the refrigerator and found neither a connection to a distant power source nor a battery, you might still argue that the fridge had some super-insulation capabilities and that the food inside had been able to stay cold since it was dragged out here. But say this explanation didn’t pan out either, and you observed the fridge staying the same temperature week after week while you opened and closed it. Then you’d start to wonder if it was powered by some technology beyond your comprehension. But pretty soon you’d notice something else about this refrigerator. The fact that it never runs out of food. Then you’d start to wonder if somehow it didn’t get restocked while you slept. But you’d realize that it replenished itself all the time, not just while you were sleeping. All this time, you’d keep eating from it. It would keep you alive out here in the middle of nowhere. And because of its mystery you’d begin to hate and fear it, and yet still it would feed you. Even though you couldn’t explain it, you’d still need it. And you’d assume that you simply didn’t understand the technology, rather than ascribe to it some kind of metaphysical power. You wouldn’t place your faith in the hands of some unknowable god. You’d place it in the technology itself. Finally, in frustration, you’d come to realize you’d exhausted your rationality and the only sensible thing to do would be to praise the mystery. You’d worship its bottles of Corona and jars of pickled beets. You’d make up prayers to the meats drawer and sing about its light bulb. And you’d start to accept the mystery as the one undeniable thing about it. That, or you’d grow so frustrated you’d push it off this cliff.”
“Is Mr. Kirkpatrick real?” I asked.
After a long gulp of beer, Bickle said, “That’s the neocortex talking again.”
― Ryan Boudinot, quote from Blueprints Of The Afterlife
“The goal is not necessarily to succeed but to keep trying, to be the kind of person who has ideas and see them through. We’ll”
― Esmé Raji Codell, quote from Educating Esmé: Diary of a Teacher's First Year
“You love him, don't you?"
"That's an impossible question to answer."
"No it isn't," she argued. "It's a simple yes or no. You either love someone or you don't."
"I don't know. Maybe."
"Renee, maybe is not an acceptable answer. That's like saying you're a little bit pregnant and or caught a touch of breast cancer. Deep down, you know whether or not you love someone.”
― Rachel K. Burke, quote from Sound Bites
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