The Spanish Love Deception

I’ll give you the world,” he said against my mouth. “The moon. The fucking stars. Anything you ask, it’s yours. I’m yours.

Because it was all you were willing to give me. And I’d rather have you hating me than not have you at all.

When I finally kiss you, there won’t be any doubt in your mind that it is real.

You feel complete in my arms. You feel like my home.

If you get any more perfect, I’m going to believe you were made just for me.

How is it possible that it feels like you are breaking my heart, and I haven’t even had you yet?

You are all that, Catalina. You are light. And passion. Your laughter alone can lift my mood and effortlessly turn my day around in a matter of seconds. Even when it's not aimed at me. You... can light up entire rooms, Catalina. You hold that kind of power. And it's because of all the different things that make you who you are. Each and every one of them, even the ones that drive me crazy in ways you can't imagine. You should never forget that.

I don’t think I’d be able to deny you a single thing if you asked, Catalina.

Because when I finally take those lips in mine, it will be the furthest thing from pretending. I will not be showing you what it would be like if you were mine. I’ll show you what it is. And I sure as hell won’t be showing how good I could make you feel if you called me yours. You’ll already know that I am.

But you are. You are worth all that trouble. You are worth walking through a fucking fire. Don’t you see that?

Being your friend has always been the last thing on my mind.

I wasn’t pretending, Catalina. Not for a minute. It was all real for me. That’s why it meant so much.

I always have time for you.

Do I have your attention?” “You don’t need to do any of that.” He lowered the large black-and-white-colored pages with a brisk motion. “You always have my undivided attention, Catalina.

He is not that good-looking. He’s just tall,

You are not on your own anymore. It’s you and me now. We are in this together, and we’ve got this.

It was a mug. And it had a joke printed on it. It said, Engineers don’t cry. They build bridges and get over it.” Someone laughed then. Isabel or perhaps Gonzalo—I wasn’t sure. With all that crazy banging, my heart had somehow moved up my throat and to my temples, so it was hard to focus on anything besides its beating and Aaron’s voice. “And you know what I did?” he continued, bitterness filling his tone. “Instead of laughing like I wanted to, instead of looking up at her and saying something funny that would hopefully make her give me one of those bright smiles I had somehow already seen her give so freely in the short day I had been around her, I pushed it all down and set the mug on my desk. Then, I thanked her and asked her if there was anything else she needed.” I knew I shouldn’t feel embarrassed, but I was. Just as much as I had been back then, if not more. It had been such a silly thing to do, and I had felt so tiny and dumb after he brushed it away so easily. Closing my eyes, I heard him continue, “I pretty much kicked her out of my office after she went out of her way and got me a gift.” Aaron’s voice got low and harsh. “A fucking welcome gift.” I opened my eyes just in time to watch him turn his head in my direction. Our gazes met. “Just like the big jerk I had advertised myself to be, I ran her out. And to this day, I regret it every time it crosses my mind. Every time I look at her.

Neither of you is at fault, Aaron. We are not programmed to lose those we love; there’s no right or wrong way to grieve.

Five tacos—Aaron had gotten me five and not four, like I had told him.

Love is worth fighting for.

What they had was the real stuff. Honest, devoted, palpable love. The one that transcended distance, differences, and obstacles. The kind that was meant to be written about in books. Thinking of it filled my chest with warmth and longing for something I didn’t know I’d ever be able to find.

When there’s a rock on the way and you fall, I tumble down with you. We fight our way up together.

My eyelids eventually fluttered shut, but right before darkness engulfed me, I thought I heard Aaron whisper, “You feel complete in my arms. You feel like my home.

You’ve never needed anyone to fight your battles, Catalina. That’s one of the things I respect the most about you.

I want your heart, Catalina.” Both of his hands rose to my shoulders, trailing up my neck and cupping my face. “I want it for myself, just how I have given you mine.” It’s yours, you beautiful and blind man, I wanted to tell him. Take it. I don’t want it anymore, I wanted to scream at him and anyone that would listen.

Set your goal free into the universe. Visualize it.

Anything that bothers you matters to me, and I want to hear about it,” he said from his position behind me. “Nothing about you is boring or doesn’t interest me—ever. Understand?

Catalina.” There it was again. Not Lina. Catalina. “I’m glad I didn’t kiss you.” Something halted in my chest. “Why?” The word was nothing more than a shaky whisper. “Because when I finally take those lips in mine, it will be the furthest thing from pretending. I will not be showing you what it would be like if you were mine. I’ll show you what it is. And I sure as hell won’t be showing how good I could make you feel if you called me yours. You’ll already know that I am.” He paused, and I swore I could see the restraint in his posture. As if he was stopping himself from pouncing and returning us to our former position, right against the hard surface of the wardrobe door. “When I finally kiss you, there won’t be any doubt in your mind that it is real.

Any other Disney movies?” I was tempting my luck here. Aaron’s expression remained serious. “All of them.” Shit. “Even Frozen? Tangled? The Princess Frog?” I asked, and he nodded. “I love animated movies. They take my mind off things.” He dipped his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “Disney, Pixar … I’m a big fan.” This was too much. First, he’d opened up about his childhood earlier today, and now, this. I wanted to ask how and why, but there was a more pressing issue. “What’s your favorite?” Please don’t say the one that will send my heart into cardiac arrest. Please don’t say it. “Up.” Fuck. He had said it. My heart struggled there for a moment. And that little spot that had been softening throughout the night got a little bigger.

That’s not an answer, baby.” His fingers increased their pace, making me light-headed. “Do you want me to get you off and hold you until you fall asleep?” His other hand rose to my breast, teasing my nipple. “Or do you want me to claim it with my cock?” So commanding and yet so fucking thoughtful. Cherishing me, ravishing me. He was everything I needed. Everything my body craved and my heart had been missing.