Arouse

Liv,” he said, his voice rough with tenderness, “you don’t have to be afraid.” “Why not?” “Because I’ll slay monsters for you.

Maybe this was meant to happen, this discovery of cracks where now a different, new light can shine through.

Since the day we met, I haven’t wanted anyone but you, never looked at another woman, never thought about one. It’s always been you Olivia.

Don’t you want to touch me? I whispered. More than I want to breathe.

You’re so damn strong, Liv, and you don’t even realize it. I’m the one who’s always had to show people I’m successful, an achiever, the best at everything I did. I’m the one who’s always been a goddamn egotist. A groveler. And you…you’re the first person who’s ever…Christ, Liv, sometimes the way you look at me makes me feel like I can hang the fucking moon.

One day I’m going to touch you in a thousand different ways and show you how to touch me,” he said.

I’ve given you all I have, all I am. You know that. Why didn’t you do the same for me?

I love him to my bones, but suddenly I’m wondering what I might have been without him.

He didn't touch me. He could have—he had the perfect reason to—but he didn't. Instead he bent to collect my papers before the breeze could whisk them away. Instead he picked up my satchel from the sidewalk and asked if I was okay. Instead he stood between me and the busy street while I brushed the dirt from my palms and tried to swallow the knot of frustration stuck in my throat. Instead he just waited. I had the strange thought that he would wait forever.

Why are you waiting for me?” I asked. “Because you’re worth it.” “You don’t know that.” “Yes, I do.” “How?” “I’ve been around. I know when something’s good." My throat tightened a little. “What if you’re wrong?” “I’m not wrong.

I want to learn how to trust a man. I wanted to know what true, physical pleasure felt like. I wanted to find the courage to be vulnerable on my own terms, as my own choice.

Since the day we met, I haven’t wanted anyone but you,” “Never looked at another woman,” he continues, “Never thought about one. It’s always been you, Olivia.

I’ll be here, beauty. Waiting for you.

Christ Liv, sometimes the way you look at me makes me feel like I can hang the fucking moon.” “Because I’ve always believed you can.

She’s pure. Despite experiences that could have irrevocably fucked her up, turned her into someone hard and jaded, she’s still wholesome.

Easy, beauty,” He presses his mouth to the tears that have slipped from the corners of my eyes and down my temples. His breath rasps against my ear. “Come first, and then I’ll fuck you.

So pretty with her long hair and bright eyes. And so pure and damaged at the same time, like a priceless vase threaded with cracks.

Our marriage has always been an island, a safe place where sea-dragons and monstrous creatures can’t reach us. Now we’re letting them in, gnashing teeth and all, and we are failing to protect each other.

Professors have a lot of power.” I almost smiled. “Even medieval history professors?” “Especially medieval history professors,” he assured me. “Knights on horseback and all that?” A responding smile tugged at his mouth. “And damsels in distress.

Instead he just waited. I had the strange thought that he would wait forever.

As self-possessed as he is, when he’s tired from working too hard, his whole demeanor softens with vulnerability… which makes me want to tuck him right beneath my heart and hold on tight.

Christ, Liv, sometimes the way you look at me makes me feel like I can hang the fucking moon.

Instead she stepped toward me. I had the strange thought that she wanted to come even closer.

I want to protect Liv from everything, but I can’t protect her from the truth. No matter how ugly it is.

I can’t tell her that our recent troubles have tilted my entire world off its axis. I can’t tell her that for the past four months, I’ve been terrified.

I gave you everything I am. Why couldn’t you do the same for me?

The kind of friend who helps you remember which way is up. And who reminds you that sometimes that's the only direction you can go.

the busy street while I brushed the