The Widow's Husband's Secret Lie

The director of the psychiatric ward is my father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former college roommate.

I read online that if you have LEDs placed, they are over ninety-eight percent effective in preventing pregnancy.” Poppy stares at me for several beats, a confused look on her face. “Do you mean… IUDs?” “What’s an IUD?” “An intrauterine device. A doctor inserts it into your uterus, and it is used to prevent pregnancy.

we buried him in a normal cemetery. We didn’t bury him in some special pet cemetery where he would come back to life after a week or two, carrying a terrible curse.

He did do a terrible thing,” the detective says. “I’ve never met anyone who had over thirty overdue library books before.” I grab a tissue from the box on the table and dab at my eyes. “I mean, two or three, yes, I can see how that could happen. Over ten would be bad enough. But over thirty?” “I know.” He sighs. “It’s the sort of thing you only see once in a lifetime as a cop, and you hope to never see it again.

I put a banana peel on the top step of our steep staircase. But in the end, it was the cut brake line that did him in.

I couldn’t take a chance.” I wipe a tear from my own eyes. “What if you thought the dress was blue and black too?” “Never!” Poppy cries. “That dress was white and gold! Anyone who thought otherwise definitely had defective rods or cones or whatever.

The Boyfriend… Is this any good?” “Oh, yes—I love it. But I’m on page two, and I’m pretty sure I already know what the twist is going to be.” I take another tentative sip of tea. “Have you ever heard of the author, Freida McFadden?” “Nope.

I’ve never met anyone who had over thirty overdue library books before.” I grab a tissue from the box on the table and dab at my eyes. “I mean, two or three, yes, I can see how that could happen. Over ten would be bad enough. But over thirty?

One woman is paying with a check. A check? Really? Who pays with a check in this century? She may as well be trading with gold trinkets.

I did tell you!” I might be forgetting things, but I remember our conversation. “I told you I was pregnant.” “Pregnant?” She looks down at the test in her hand and then back at my face. “Alice, this is a Covid test.” “What?” I gasp. “How could that be?” “It literally says Covid-19 Ag right on the test!

How could I have gotten LED and IUD mixed up? Honestly, they should put some sort of warning on the box of LED lights: These lights will not prevent pregnancy.

Tell me. Please, Brant.” “She…” He squeezes his eyes shut. “She doesn’t like Nickelback. And I…” His Adam’s apple bobs. “I love them. There—I said it. Nickelback is my absolute favorite band of all time, and my own wife can’t stand them.” “Brant…” “You have no idea what it’s been like.” He wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

I took precautions to keep it from happening.” I let out a wretched sob. “I put LED lights in every closet, but I still got pregnant. I don’t understand it.” She cocks her head to the side. “LED lights?” I nod. “I read online that if you have LEDs placed, they are over ninety-eight percent effective in preventing pregnancy.” Poppy stares at me for several beats, a confused look on her face. “Do you mean… IUDs?” “What’s an IUD?

There is no possible way you could know the truth. There’s no way you could ever guess that the killer is actually Steve. Wait. Oh

Alice, I had no idea. You don't look it at all, honestly! How far along are you? Seven months? Eight months?" I glare at her. "Six weeks".

He even figured out that I like presents. He really is very intuitive about me.

But every time I shop for shampoo, I start to doubt myself. Do I need one that's more hydrating? Less hydrating? Is my hair oily or dry? How have I gotten through 34 years of life without knowing this basic fact about my hair? ... I can see why I need egg-white protein in my diet, but do I need it in my hair? I examine the bottle, studying the shockingly long list of ingredients, which includes many items that have over ten syllables, none of which are coconut- or egg-related. And then, in the middle of dodecenyl succinate, I whip my head around.

I chose a coffin that was white-with-gold trim.

I could do it if I wanted. The director of the psychiatric ward is my father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former college roommate. He’ll do whatever I want him to do—trust me.

Poppy sits beside me and idly picks up the paperback book I’ve got lying on the coffee table. She reads the description and flips through the pages. “The Boyfriend… Is this any good?

No. I will not think about that dress anymore. That time in my life is officially over.

never go higher than that—I haven’t ventured even once up to the attic, which contains a single room that locks from the outside.

But the next words out of his mouth change everything. “I’m Brant. Grant’s identical twin.

He would have trusted him even less if he’d known the truth about our houseman’s dark past.

She looks surprisingly real for a person I am hallucinating. I am sort of impressed with my brain right now. ... "You are a figment of my imagination," I clarify. "I fabricated you as a way to deal with my husband and his obsession.

The array of sunglasses is only slightly less overwhelming than the number of shampoos. I pick up a pair of dark ones that are polarized. I have no idea what that means, but it must be important, because the tag on the glasses says it in big block letters.

What’s going on? Why is the shower on?

I had never killed anyone before. Not to say that I hadn’t ever thought about it. We all think of killing someone. That old lady at the checkout line who is paying in pennies from her change purse. The really tall guy who sits in front of you in the movie theater. Basically, every screaming infant on a plane. But it’s only a fantasy. You never do it. I didn’t have a choice with Grant, though. He was a true monster in every sense of the word, and the only way I could escape was to end his life. Really, I would be doing the world a kindness. Because I had never killed anyone before, I decided to hedge my bets. I mixed hemlock into the orange juice that he drank every morning. I ground up some deadly nightshade to add to the milk he poured on his cereal.