Leah on the Offbeat

Imagine going about your day knowing someone’s carrying you in their mind. That has to be the best part of being in love- the feeling of having a home in some else’s brain.

I can’t fuck your life, I’m monogamously fucking my own life.

I hate when assholes have talent. I want to live in a world where good people rule at everything and shitty people suck at everything.

I can't help it. I'm a Slytherin." And I'm the worst kind of Slytherin. I'm the kind who's so stupidly in love with a Gryffindor, she can't even function. I'm the Draco from some shitty Drarry fic that the author abandoned after four chapters.

I swear, people can’t wrap their minds around the concept of a fat girl who doesn’t diet. Is it that hard to believe I might actually like my body?

Mr. Spier, memorizing the Hamilton soundtrack is not going to save you on the AP Euro exam.

You can't just like Harry Potter. You have to be balls-out obsessed with it.

Leah.' Mom shakes her head. 'You've got to stop doing this.' 'Doing what?' 'Burning everything to the ground whenever something goes wrong.

I used to think boners literally pointed in the direction of the person you're attracted to, like a compass. That would be helpful. Mortifying as fuck, but at least it would clarify things.

I hate when writers make Draco sweet. Sorry, but Draco's a bitch. Own it. I mean, yeah, he's a ball of mush underneath, but you have to earn it with him.

Apparently, Simon’s dad asked the tour guide at Duke to “please elaborate on the campus gay scene.” “I wanted to fucking die,” Simon told me.

There's this tug in my chest. Because when Bram says Simon's name, he pronounces every part of it. Like it's worth being careful over.

It's like it doesn't even matter if I like my body, because there's always someone there to remind me I shouldn't.

She probably thinks Troye Sivan's songs are about girls.

I'm basically your resident fat Slytherin Rory Gilmore.

RIP Leah Burke. She died of acute awkwardosis.

I am such a dick. Like, I'm an actual flaccid penis of a person.

But it sucks when life moves along without you. Sometimes I feel left out even when life's moving along with me.

It was unicorns vomiting sunbeams.

But I know what it's like to be not good enough, in some bone-deep fundamental way.

if Katie Leung sweetly rejecting Daniel Radcliffe in a Scottish accent wasn't your sexual awakening, I don't even want to know you.

And in that moment--for a split second-- I feel it. How short that is. How soon everything changes. It's strange, because good-byes are a thing I can understand intellectually, but they almost never feel real. Which makes it hard to brace for impact. I don't know how to miss people when they're standing right in front of me.

Then her hand brushed close to mine, and my organs rearranged themselves.

I feel stronger when I look cute.

She makes me want to shove my hand into my chest and rip my own heart out.

Did you know I had an ultrasound the day before my prom?" "That's . . . cool?" "It was cool! It was the big one, too. That's when I found out your gender." "Gender is a social construction.

That has to be the best part of being in love—the feeling of having a home in someone else’s brain.

I feel like a campfire, like I could burn for days.