Pillage

I'm man enough to know when to scream.

I vowed to never, ever talk or reason like an adult.

I shouldn't have said it, but the word slipped out of my mouth as easy as air. it wasn't exactly the kind of work any well-behaved student would use, which sort of explained why I had just used it. And it certainly isn't the most elegant way to start off a story, but it honestly represents what I was feeling. Besides, I could have said something a lot stronger. But not everybody wants to read a story with those kinds of words and thoughts being expressed in the very first sentence. "Stop swearing," Jason screamed.

That said, I, Beck Phillips, take full responsibility for being stuck in m y school's pitch-black venting system with my friend Jason, behind me and a garbage bag full of angry bees in front of me.

Stupid deer," I said, embarrassed about being startled. "We need a ladder." "I think they're easier to shoot with a rifle." "I'm not talking about the deer," I said, hitting Milo on the back of his shoulder. "We need a ladder to look over the wall." "Or a catapult," Milo said seriously.

Mercury dropped the purple car and shot up into the air, whistling like a shooting star. The woman in the car next to me looked up at me like I was a superhero. I smiled at her and jumped down, trying to be smooth. I landed wrong and went sliding on my face. I glanced back at her. She appeared less impressed than before.

I had learned years ago that despite what so many adults always said, there really was such a thing as a stupid question. I had asked a number of them myself over the course of my life. But, I had also learned that life required asking stupid questions every now and then.

Fortunately, for everyone everywhere, some promises are made to be broken.

I figured if I could kill a dragon, I could kiss a girl.

In the history of mothers there had certainly been better, but in fairness to history there had most certainly been worse.