Quotes from Magic Burns

Ilona Andrews ·  260 pages

Rating: (59.6K votes)


“The vampire stared at me, his mouth slack as Ghastek assessed his options. I took a couple of forms from my desk, put them into the vamp's mouth, and pulled them up by their edges.
"What are you doing?" Ghastek asked.
"My hole puncher broke."
"You have no respect for the undead.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Not only will you sleep with me, but you will say 'please.'"
I stared at him, shocked.
The smile widened. "You will say 'please' before and 'thank you' after."
Nervous laughter bubbled up. "You've gone insane. All that peroxide in your hair finally did your brain in, Goldilocks.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“I don't want it to be attributed to a loss of control on my part. When I throw you out of the window, I want there to be no doubt the act was deliberate.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“You don't cause problems. You cause catastrophes.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“How much are you lifting?"
"Seven hundred."
Alrighty then. I will just stand over here, out of your way, and hope you don't remember to kick my ass.
He grinned. "Wanna spot me?"
"No thanks. How about I just scream verbal encouragements at you?" I took a deep breath and barked, "No pain, no gain! That pain is just weakness leaving your body! Come on! Push! Push! Make that weight your bitch!”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



“I'm a substitute mom."
"You're more like a crazy aunt who only gets called when somebody needs bailing out of jail.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“He put the book down. “As you wish.” He rose and walked past me. I lowered my sword, expecting him to pass, but suddenly he stepped in dangerously close. “Welcome home. I’m glad you made it. There is coffee in the kitchen for you.”
My mouth gaped open.
He inhaled my scent, bent close, about to kiss me…
I just stood there like an idiot.
Curran smirked and whispered in my ear instead. “Psych.”
And just like that, he was out the door and gone.
Oh boy.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Yes. What is it, guilt, revenge, love, what?”
I swallowed. “I live alone.”
"And your point is?”
"You have the Pack. You’re surrounded by people who would fall over themselves for the pleasure of your company. I have no one. My parents are dead, my entire family is gone. I have no friends. Except Jim, and that’s more of a working relationship than anything else. I have no lover. I can’t even have a pet, because I’m not at the house often enough to keep it from starving. When I come crawling home, bleeding and filthy and exhausted, the house is dark and empty. Nobody keeps the porch light on for me. Nobody hugs me and says, ‘Hey, I’m glad you made it. I’m glad you’re okay. I was worried.’ Nobody cares if I live or die. Nobody makes me coffee, nobody holds me before I go to bed, nobody fixes my medicine when I’m sick. I’m by myself.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Your ability to remain alive never ceases to amaze me.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“You're an interesting woman."
"Your interest has been duly noted.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



“I think I've been rather reasonable about this whole situation."
"How do you figure?"
"They are still breathing, aren't they?”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“I'm secure enough in myself to wear panties with bows on them. Besides, they are comfy and soft."
"I bet." He almost purred.
I gulped.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Now climb, young grasshopper, so your Kung Fu won't be weak.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“You know what I like about you? You have no sense. You sit here in my house, you can barely hold a spoon, and you're telling me 'no'. You'd pull on Death's whiskers if you could reach them.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“I make a bad mom, but I can pull off a crazy aunt.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



“You know," she said, stirring her tea, "the fastest way to get him off your back is to sleep with him. And tell him you love him. Preferably while in bed."
I smirked and the tea almost came out of my nose. "He'd run like he was on fire.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“He lunged for the maps. I grabbed the chair and hit him with it. He went down. I hit him again to make sure he stayed that way, stepped over him, and picked up the maps.
"I win.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“We were screwed and he didn't even kiss us first.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“He said 'woman' in the same way I'd say 'Mmmm, yummy chocolate.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Secret to what?"
"Secret to shutting you up," he said. "I just have to beat you till you're half-dead, then give you chicken soup and"--he raised his hands--"blessed silence.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



“You're not going to die?"
"Not right this minute." And of course, saying something like that usually resulted in immediate dying. I braced myself for a stray meteorite falling through the roof to crush my skull.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“I chuckled to myself and kept walking. The Universe had proven Curran wrong: a person who aggravated him more than me did, in fact, exist.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“What would I do without the moral compass of a teenage werewolf?”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Wanna spot me?"
"No thanks. How about I just scream verbal encouragements at you?”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“You were joking about the whole please and thank you thing, right?"
"Meant every word." A little light danced in his eyes and he very deliberately said, "Baby."
No.
He laughed. "You should see your face right now."
"Don't call me that."
"Would you prefer 'darling'? Or maybe 'cupcake'?" He winked.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



“I had the metabolism of a hummingbird on crack.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“If he full-out flexed, I would probably faint, or jump off the building.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“It's not your job to die for your Pack! It's your job to make the other bastards die for theirs.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“This was hell and I was its fury.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns


“Perhaps I just wasn't scary enough. Maybe I should invest in some horns or fangs.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Burns



About the author

Ilona Andrews
Born place: in Russian Federation
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