The Words I Wish I Said

we both thought we were on the same page but it turns out we’re reading different stories

it’s really all about who’s the last one on your mind before you go to sleep. - it’s always you

feel numb, i can’t feel my emotions my body my heart, i act like it’s there like i’m fine but honestly my own brain is confusing me.

they all ask me where do you see yourself in ten years? i honestly don’t know because a year ago i wouldn’t see myself here.

they keep saying it will get better but when? being alone and feeling lonely are two different things

when you smile my heart just fills up with joy

this heartbreak is nothing like the others because this heartbreak is something that i know you wouldn’t have chosen. - sucks

my imaginary friend would be happy to hear my adventures but it’s too bad he’s left a long time ago - adulthood

you get over them like this- at first, you can’t. his name is repeated over and over inside your little brain, singing a tune to you. until your heart gets bored of the tune that only ends up breaking you. one day at a time, you get over them when you stop searching for them in a crowd. you get over them when every love song on the radio is just another song. you get over them when every place you went is just a new place to make memories in. one day at a time. you get over them slowly, you get over them by focusing on your friendships, you get over them by focusing on your family. you get over them by loving yourself. you get over them by yourself, not latching onto a new one. you get over them when you realize your worth is not another person. you think you’re over them, until you catch sight of them in a crowded starbucks or sometime in your day, and you can’t explain why it hurt you, you thought you were over them. until, you see them and all the memories you had flushed your head and you remember how much you miss them. one day at a time. you get over them by doing everything else you love hoping that their name will disappear from the top of that list. you get over them when you realize they left you for a reason, and maybe that reason means they won’t come back. ever. you get over them when you realize you both were reading different books but thought your page was the same.

something that’s sad is when you know someone’s falling in love with you but you’re sitting there afraid of falling for them because you’re not prepared to be hurt again.

it’s bad, i’m protecting myself so i’m so very sorry for you, trying to love someone broken like me.

i’m addicted to the feeling of adventure. who am i to you? i’m scared to love, it’s bad, i’m protecting myself so i’m so very sorry for you, trying to love someone broken like me.

confidence is a nightmare to insecure men.

should of stuck with my gut instinct

02.11.2018 i’m ready whenever you’re ready. i’ve set everything up perfectly for when you come back. but for some reason, there’s a voice in the back of my head, telling me you’ll never come back, and you’ll move on, i mean, after all, that’s what they all did. but hey, if it’s different, i’m ready for you. i’m always ready for you.

twinkle twinkle little star let me get hit by a car jump off a roof and try to fly oh god i wish i could die twinkle twinkle little knife help me end this wretched life.

you deserve more than the kind words i write about you on paper you deserve the whole world wrapped in tissue and a bow for just breathing this air and being a glorious sight to see on this earth.