Quotes from The Girl on the Train

Paula Hawkins ·  323 pages

Rating: (1.4M votes)


“Hollowness: that I understand. I'm starting to believe that there isn't anything you can do to fix it. That's what I've taken from the therapy sessions: the holes in your life are permanent. You have to grow around them, like tree roots around concrete; you mold yourself through the gaps”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I have never understood how people can blithely disregard the damage they do by following their hearts.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“There’s something comforting about the sight of strangers safe at home.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“it’s possible to miss what you’ve never had, to mourn for it.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I have lost control over everything, even the places in my head.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



“The holes in your life are permanent. You have to grow around them, like tree roots around concrete; you mould yourself through the gaps.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“Life is not a paragraph, and death is no parenthesis.

(This is a reference to an E.E. Cummings poem within the author's work)”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“When did you become so weak?” I don’t know. I don’t know where that strength went, I don’t remember losing it. I think that over time it got chipped away, bit by bit, by life, by the living of it.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“There’s nothing so painful, so corrosive, as suspicion.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I can’t do this, I can’t just be a wife. I don’t understand how anyone does it—there is literally nothing to do but wait. Wait for a man to come home and love you. Either that or look around for something to distract you.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



“I want to drag knives over my skin, just to feel something other than shame, but I'm not even brave enough for that”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“But I did become sadder, and sadness gets boring after a while, for the sad person and for everyone around them.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“let’s be honest: women are still only really valued for two things—their looks and their role as mothers.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I’m playing at real life instead of actually living it.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“And I’ve just got to let myself feel the pain, because if I don’t, if I keep numbing it, it’ll never really go away.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



“I am not the girl I used to be. I am no longer desirable, I’m off-putting in some way. It’s not just that I’ve put on weight, or that my face is puffy from the drinking and the lack of sleep; it’s as if people can see the damage written all over me, can see it in my face, the way I hold myself, the way I move.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“A tiding of magpies: One for sorrow, two for joy, three for a girl, four for a boy, five for silver, six for gold, seven for a secret never to be told”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I have never understood how people can blithely disregard the damage they do by following their hearts. Who was it said that following your heart is a good thing? It is pure egotism, a selfishness to conquer all.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“It's impossible to resist the kindness of strangers.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“But then I think, this happens sometimes, doesn’t it? People you have a history with, they won’t let you go, and as hard as you might try, you can’t disentangle yourself, can’t set yourself free. Maybe after a while you just stop trying.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



“Sometimes I catch myself trying to remember the last time I had meaningful physical contact with another person, just a hug or a heartfelt squeeze of my hand, and my heart twitches.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“Beautiful sunshine, cloudless skies, no one to play with, nothing to do. Living like this, the way I’m living at the moment, is harder in the summer when there is so much daylight, so little cover of darkness, when everyone is out and about, being flagrantly, aggressively happy. It’s exhausting, and it makes you feel bad if you’re not joining in.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“I have to find a way of making myself happy, I have to stop looking for happiness elsewhere. It’s true,”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“He’s a master at it, making me feel as though everything is my fault, making me feel worthless.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“It’s ridiculous, when I think about it. How did I find myself here? I wonder where it started, my decline; I wonder at what point I could have halted it. Where did I take the wrong turn?”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



“It’s impossible to resist the kindness of strangers. Someone who looks at you, who doesn’t know you, who tells you it’s OK, whatever you did, whatever you’ve done: you suffered, you hurt, you deserve forgiveness.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“One for sorrow, two for joy, three for a girl . . . Three for a girl. I’m stuck on three, I just can’t get any further. My head is thick with sounds, my mouth thick with blood. Three for a girl. I can hear the magpies—they’re laughing, mocking me, a raucous cackling. A tiding. Bad tidings. I can see them now, black against the sun. Not the birds, something else. Someone’s coming. Someone is speaking to me. Now look. Now look what you made me do.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“it’s as if people can see the damage written all over me, can see it in my face, the way I hold myself, the way I move.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“They’re what I lost, they’re everything I want to be.”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


“Who's to say that once I run, I'll find that isn't enough? Who's to say I won't end up feeling exactly the way I do right now-not safe, but stifled? Maybe I'll want to run again, and again, and eventually I'll end up back on those old tracks, because there's nowhere left to go. Maybe. Maybe not. You have to take the risk, don't you”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train



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About the author

Paula Hawkins
Born place: Zimbabwe
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“The news filled me with such euphoria that for an instant I was numb. My ingrained self-censorship immediately started working: I registered the fact that there was an orgy of weeping going on around me, and that I had to come up with some suitable performance. There seemed nowhere to hide my lack of correct emotion except the shoulder of the woman in front of me, one of the student officials, who was apparently heartbroken. I swiftly buried my head in her shoulder and heaved appropriately. As so often in China, a bit of ritual did the trick. Sniveling heartily she made a movement as though she was going to turn around and embrace me I pressed my whole weight on her from behind to keep her in her place, hoping to give the impression that I was in a state of abandoned grief.

In the days after Mao's death, I did a lot of thinking. I knew he was considered a philosopher, and I tried to think what his 'philosophy' really was. It seemed to me that its central principle was the need or the desire? for perpetual conflict. The core of his thinking seemed to be that human struggles were the motivating force of history and that in order to make history 'class enemies' had to be continuously created en masse. I wondered whether there were any other philosophers whose theories had led to the suffering and death of so many. I thought of the terror and misery to which the Chinese population had been subjected. For what?

But Mao's theory might just be the extension of his personality. He was, it seemed to me, really a restless fight promoter by nature, and good at it. He understood ugly human instincts such as envy and resentment, and knew how to mobilize them for his ends. He ruled by getting people to hate each other. In doing so, he got ordinary Chinese to carry out many of the tasks undertaken in other dictatorships by professional elites. Mao had managed to turn the people into the ultimate weapon of dictatorship.

That was why under him there was no real equivalent of the KGB in China. There was no need. In bringing out and nourishing the worst in people, Mao had created a moral wasteland and a land of hatred. But how much individual responsibility ordinary people should share, I could not decide.

The other hallmark of Maoism, it seemed to me, was the reign of ignorance. Because of his calculation that the cultured class were an easy target for a population that was largely illiterate, because of his own deep resentment of formal education and the educated, because of his megalomania, which led to his scorn for the great figures of Chinese culture, and because of his contempt for the areas of Chinese civilization that he did not understand, such as architecture, art, and music, Mao destroyed much of the country's cultural heritage. He left behind not only a brutalized nation, but also an ugly land with lit He of its past glory remaining or appreciated.

The Chinese seemed to be mourning Mao in a heartfelt fashion. But I wondered how many of their tears were genuine. People had practiced acting to such a degree that they confused it with their true feelings. Weeping for Mao was perhaps just another programmed act in their programmed lives.

Yet the mood of the nation was unmistakably against continuing Mao's policies. Less than a month after his death, on 6 October, Mme Mao was arrested, along with the other members of the Gang of Four. They had no support from anyone not the army, not the police, not even their own guards. They had had only Mao. The Gang of Four had held power only because it was really a Gang of Five.

When I heard about the ease with which the Four had been removed, I felt a wave of sadness. How could such a small group of second-rate tyrants ravage 900 million people for so long? But my main feeling was joy. The last tyrants of the Cultural Revolution were finally gone.”
― Jung Chang, quote from Wild Swans: Three Daughters of China


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