Quotes from Nightlight: A Parody

154 pages

Rating: (9.4K votes)


“So, Belle, what's new today?"

Dad," I said, grasping his hands and looking directly into his eyes. "I'm in the deepest love that has ever occurred in the history of the world."

Gosh, Belle. When someone asks you 'What's new?' the correct answer is 'Not much'. Besides, isn't it a little soon to cut yourself off from the rest of your peers, depending on a boyfriend to satisfy your social needs as opposed to making friends? Imagine what would happen if something forced that boy to leave! I'm imagining pages and pages would happen - with nothing but the names of the months on them.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I typed in a single word: Vampre. Google asked, 'Did you mean vampire?' I said, 'Yes.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him -- which I assumed was wildly out of his control -- that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he has kissed me.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I had recently come into the possession of a Thesaurus. You would not believe how many words there are! When I opened that book, I was like, whoa! Word party!”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I was so attracted to him I could have peed myself right there on the spot, but I hadn't done anything like that in a while. I was older now, and harnessed my feelings in moments like these by opening and closing my fists very rapidly.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody



“After dinner, Edwart took me upstairs to see his room. At the top of the stairs was a giant wooden cross.

"Ironic, huh?" Edwart said.

"Why?" I asked with trepidation, imagining that, at any second, Edwart would turn into dust, which I would then sweep up and disperse over my furniture so he would always be with me.

"Because we're Jewish, of course--nonpracticing.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“Nice piano," I said. "Do you play?"
"oh no, but Edwart does!" Eva Mullen said.
"A little," Edwart said sheepishly.
"Go ahead, play!" Eva said. She picked up the triangle that was lying on the piano and handed it to Edwart. He started banging on it. It sounded like construction work very early in the morning.
"Whoops. I messed up. Let me start over," he said.
He started banging again.
"Wait. Uh. I haven't practiced in a while. Let me start over."
Edwart continued to bang the triangle. Eva closed her eyes and raised her arms, swaying rhythmically to Edwart's music. Edwart held the triangle up high, in what appeared to be a grand finish, but then he brought it down hard, hitting the top of the piano. He continued to bang the piano, putting the entire force of his slim body into each smash. The piano shook. The room vibrated. When he finished I subtly removed my hands from my ears.
"I wrote that for you," Edwart murmured, drawing me close. "It's called Belle's Lullaby.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“You're lucky I was on that roof all day. That old man... he was trying to sell you a Sega product.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“The two things I look for in a guy is how tall he is and whether or not he's a vampire. Pretty much all my crushes have been one or the other. One guy, actually, was both big and a vampire, but he turned out to be gay.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“Germs contagious, contagious alert!
But Edwart and Purell are stronger than dirt!”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody



“He made small talk on the way about how he was abandoned as a child and will only rest easy once he is avenged. His name was Tom.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I'll have AB positive', I told Josh when he returned from the dance floor, 'What's it made of? Apples and Bananas?'
-Belle Goose”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“ You don't have to hide your natural inclination to boss me around. I want you to feel comfortable with me, Edwart. To the point of domination."
"Okay, okay." He took a deep breath and pointed at me. "You," he said stiffly, the words flowing straight from some primordial, bossy wordbank. "Come to the place where you want to go, which, hopefully, is my car, where I will be, God willing.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I took the one letter he had for us. It was from the Switchblade Gas & Electric Company. I didn't know I had admirers there too, but I wasn't that surprised. I threw it in the trash with the IRS's love letters and closed the door without reply.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“Quick, I told myself. Try to remember what you learned from Jimbo's Self Defence for Young Ladies. Jimbo was a beefy man with prison tats.
"Go into the nearest dark alley," I recalled Jimbo saying. "Freeze like a rabbit or the creature you desire your attacker to mistake you for. If your attacker shouts out to you, respond politely - maybe your optimism will change his mind. If you're about to get into an elevator with a man you feel uncomfortable spending time with in a small, escapeless room, head right in. Remember , fear i an irrational emotion, you should probably ignore it."
Armed with these tips, I hung a right into the nearest dead-end, curled into a ball and started rolling.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody



“They all got really quiet and started to lick their lips, closing in on Lucy. I started to lick my lips, too, because it's one of those subconcious, contagious things like sneezing, but then I stopped because it just isn't worth it if you forgot to bring ChapStick.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“How about we walk back? Through the cemetery?' One thing my mom had taught me is that it's difficult to refuse requests made in italics.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“Listen' he whispered ferociously, like a ferocious breeze or a very gentle hurricane.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I noticed there was garlic above the doorframe. Edwart held a stake in one hand and a 'Team Jacob' shirt in the other.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“All of a sudden, he began to laugh. Had I said something funny? Had he? How long had I been spacing out for, slowly growing conscious that my fate was in the hands of a group of college kids who'd kill me off just for a laugh.
Little did they realize that I was organizing a revolt.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody



“Germs contagious, Contagious alert!
But Edwart and Purell are stronger than dirt!”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“The two things I look for in a guy is how tall he is and whether or not he's a vampire.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“Then, suddenly, I remembered the accident, and Edwart's snow-proof body, and his eyes that changed from I-don't-remember to green, and I knew.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“So all this time you thought I was a vampire?' Edwart whispered furiously, pulling me a few inches to the left.
'Sure,' I said, 'you know, the lion falls for the lamb...'
'What?'
'Sorry. It's easier for me if I explain things in animal terms.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I balked. Another vampire? I guess it made sense; the states of the Pacific Northwest were known for their lenient monster laws.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody



“It suddenly occurred to me that, after all that frolicking in the meadows, he hadn't kissed me. Was it because of the mold that grew in my sinuses?”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“I had a dejected, brooding expression on my face, and I
could tell from the reflection in the window that it was also
an intriguing expression.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“It’s no big deal. I want to go. I want to leave all of my friends and the sunlight for a small, rainy town.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


“When guys gnash their teeth and knit their brows in a broody, furious expression, it means they have found their soulmate.”
― quote from Nightlight: A Parody


Video

Popular quotes

“Ayden's eyes snapped up and narrowed to slits. "This is a collar," he said flatly.
"Nay!" Freyrík said. "'Tis . . ."
"A neck belt, perhaps? To hold my shirt up?"
"A cravat," Freyrík said firmly. "Very fashionable, I assure you."
He felt the elf's stare on his throat, unyielding as a choking hand. "Yet you do not wear one.”
― Rachel Haimowitz, quote from Counterpoint


“That was the problem with love, though, wasn't it. It couldn't be helped, couldn't be controlled. It just roared in and took whatever it wanted, destroyed whatever it wanted; the most dangerous addiction of all, because nobody survived it intact.
But an addiction that was impossible to let go.”
― Stacia Kane, quote from Chasing Magic


“A new generation is growing up in our midst, a generation actuated by new ideas and new principles. It is serious and enthusiastic for these new ideas and its enthusiasm, even when it is misdirected, is, I believe, in the main sincere. But we are living in a sceptical and, if I may use the phrase, a thought-tormented age: and sometimes I fear that this new generation, educated or hypereducated as it is, will lack those qualities of humanity, of hospitality, of kindly humour which belonged to an older day.”
― James Joyce, quote from The Dead


“And I couldn't help but think about the time during the operation when there was nothing in my check: when they removed my heart, and before they put the other hear tin. When I was connected to the heart and lunch machine. When I was technically dead....

But I wasn't dead now...”
― Loretta Ellsworth, quote from In a Heartbeat


“The way she sat now, leaning forward frowning, biting her pink bottom lip, her shirt dipping to reveal a hint of her cleavage... He wondered idly if he could get her to bend over a little farther...

"Just what are you staring at, exactly?"

Kadar snapped back to reality. "You. You've been thinking hard for the last five minutes. It's not good for you to strain your pretty little head like that. I'm waiting for the steam to shoot out of your ears to relieve the pressure on your brain."

"Aha." Audrey glanced at Jack and George. "What you have here is a man who was caught gaping at my breasts, and now he's trying to cover it up with rudeness.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Fate's Edge


Interesting books

Last Days
(2.4K)
Last Days
by Adam Nevill
Room for You
(16K)
Room for You
by Beth Ehemann
The Mute's Soliloquy: a Memoir
(761)
The Mute's Soliloquy...
by Pramoedya Ananta Toer
Troika
(388)
Troika
by Adam Pelzman
Something From Tiffany’s
(4K)
Something From Tiffa...
by Melissa Hill
Through the Looking Glass
(80.7K)
Through the Looking...
by Lewis Carroll

About BookQuoters

BookQuoters is a community of passionate readers who enjoy sharing the most meaningful, memorable and interesting quotes from great books. As the world communicates more and more via texts, memes and sound bytes, short but profound quotes from books have become more relevant and important. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author’s best ideas.

We thoughtfully gather quotes from our favorite books, both classic and current, and choose the ones that are most thought-provoking. Each quote represents a book that is interesting, well written and has potential to enhance the reader’s life. We also accept submissions from our visitors and will select the quotes we feel are most appealing to the BookQuoters community.

Founded in 2023, BookQuoters has quickly become a large and vibrant community of people who share an affinity for books. Books are seen by some as a throwback to a previous world; conversely, gleaning the main ideas of a book via a quote or a quick summary is typical of the Information Age but is a habit disdained by some diehard readers. We feel that we have the best of both worlds at BookQuoters; we read books cover-to-cover but offer you some of the highlights. We hope you’ll join us.