Drink, Slay, Love

To you,” he said, “I surrender my heart and soul.” She rolled her eyes. “Very romantic, considering you have neither.

You’re a teenage boy. I have boobs. What part of the equation is missing?

Tara. I'm a vampire," Pearl said. "Yeah, whatever, and I'm queen of the sea." "Your Marine Majesty, I'm a vampire," Pearl said. Concentrating, she slid her fangs out. "Tara. Tara!" She curled back her lips to expose the points. "See" Tara screamed. "I won't hurt you," Pearl said. Calm down. Sheesh." Tara continued to scream. Pearl considered biting her merely to shut her up. Regrettably that would be counter productive. Studying her nails, she waited for Tara to quit screaming. She noticed that Tara didn't try to exit the car, which was an interesting choice. "You aren't running away," Pearl said. "Duh, it's raining outside," Tara said.

Do you believe in vampires? Not the sparkly variety.

I hope I haven't hurt your feelings,' he said. 'I don't have feelings, at least not the inconvenient ones.

You’ll never make it through life if you let irrational fears freeze you all the time.

Americans invented adolescence. It is not a natural phenomenon. Adolescence is a social construct, created by an urban-industrial society that keeps its young at home far past puberty. Teenage angst is a luxury if a successful modern human conceit that isn't condoned by our superior species.

Do you know how to drive?" he asked. "Sure," she said. "This one is the gas.

Only Uncle Pascha ignored her. He was contemplating his chessboard. She doubted that he'd move his piece today. It had been his turn for only six months. Once, he had gone three years between moves. He preferred a leisurely game.

Last period of the day was new gym class. It was her only class that didn't include Evan, which was a relief. She should be functioning at a peak concentration, but he and his luminous eyes kept distracting her. First opprtunity I have, she thought. I'll bite him.

'Hubba-Hubba' never slips out," Zeke said. "You selected those words with deliberate intent, and I question your commitment to the respectable use of the English language.

That would have been too obvious," Matt said. "You just said I never choose scissors so you had to know I would choose scissors so I couldn't choose scissors because you'd know it. Hence, the rock." "Hence the paper covering your rock. You ask her." "Well played my friend," Matt said. "Well played.

Always talk, talk, talk with you people," Pearl said. "You know, sometimes violence really is the answer.

My manly strength will not allow me to choose a less unyielding material," Matt said. "I have rocks for muscles. You fear my strength.

I'm a bloodsucking fiend," she said. "I'm not supposed to be reassuring.

Her kind was supposed to be irresistibly alluring to humans. She was the humanoid equivalent of a Venus flytrap.

Glaring at the unicorn silhouette, she decided she hated coincidences. Or cosmic signs. Whichever it was. She felt as if the universe were laughing at her.