XOXO, Cody: An Opinionated Homosexual's Guide to Self-Love, Relationships, and Tactful Pettiness

You are fabulous, but not everyone is going to like you. That’s okay.

If you’re asking someone how much they’re making or how to better your business or how to get ahead in your career, and you don’t put action behind the information they share, don’t go back to that person again. It’s an insult to their time and their energy.

sometimes you don’t want to learn a hard lesson, you just want to be a petty bitch and make your ex jealous, and that’s okay, too.

Success is never created in a vacuum, so I try to operate with a sense of compassion and gratitude for everyone who has their hand in the work that makes me successful. It’s a collaborative process, and I never forget that.

Do indulge in retail therapy! If you want to bury your traumas and discomforts in buying things, I condone that.

Do be a ho. There’s nothing wrong with being a ho. Be a ho! Be a ho all you want. Shake your ass, shake your titties, have fun. Do who you want to do. Just make sure it’s consensual and respectful.

The process of self-love starts with loving others.

Any relationship can live in a duality. Our parents can give us love, joy, and amazing memories, while also unloading a lot of their shit onto us and unleashing trauma that follows us into our adult lives. That’s true no matter how privileged you grew up, or how rough you had it. It’s on us to do the work, forgive those who might have hurt us, and heal, so that we can stop the cycle rather than project our shit onto our children or the other important people in our lives.

realized that we have to love our parents like they are going to die, because they are.

the idea of imperfect care. We are all here because somebody took care of us—somebody fed us and changed our diapers and tried to make sure that we were alive. That care may have been messy, but that person’s intention was to do the best that they could with the tools at their disposal, and without that care—without that kindness or support or whatever it was they provided—we wouldn’t be here. We wouldn’t exist.

There was a time when any book written by a fitness personality would be a weight-loss book. Back in those days, these pages would probably be called Bye, Booze! Drop the Alcohol, Lose Weight or Spin Cycle: Ride Your Way to a Better Body. I am so happy to be working in this industry at a time when the conversation has shifted toward becoming the best version of yourself and celebrating what you’re capable of rather than how little space you take up.

My man still hasn’t left his wife. What should I do? A: Girl, read that question back to yourself! Do you really want to date someone who has cheated on his wife with you?

If you don’t do your civic duty, you ain’t getting no booty.

Trust timing, trust yourself, trust the universe. What’s meant for you is gonna happen.