Quotes from Tyed

L.J. Shen ·  222 pages

Rating: (6.4K votes)


“What the hell is he, anyway? Latino? Asian? Mixed Caucasian? He looks like he’s been photoshopped by a bunch of horny teenagers.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“It looks like Brain and Hormones are in for a fight. Just as long as Heart stays out of the ring.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Step Away, Coffee. This Is A Job For Alcohol.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“At the moment, my biggest plan for the future consists of a take-out pizza and re-watching the first six seasons of Sons of Anarchy. I’m nurturing a monogamous, not-at-all disturbing relationship with Charlie Hunnam's work right now.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“I won't hit you, but I'll hurt you'.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed



“No, I took you out on a date because I want to fuck your brains out, among other things, and I know that the feeling is mutual. Unlike your buddy Shane, I don’t sugarcoat my intentions. I don’t want to be your friend. I have no interest in hanging out with you at the mall or choosing outfits with you or crap like that. I crave you. I want all of you, every single inch of you. And call it an only-child syndrome, but I. DO. NOT. FUCKING. SHARE.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“This place is crazy, B. You’ll develop testicles just by breathing the air here.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Women like men who play hockey, football, basketball and golf (okay, scratch golf).”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“I Hate Being Bipolar. It’s Awesome!”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“If it ain't worth cheating on, it ain't worth winning." Yes.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed



“Nope, she would not be weeping with joy. But she would be weeping, alright.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Yeah, it's a souvenir from my very first XWL win. Vicious headlock, but I managed. The fighter ears definitely bring down my stock. It’s a bitch, for sure. I constantly have to drain fluid from them with a syringe.” “That’s disgusting, Tyler.” This, from my nana, who has a green, double-headed dildo on her nightstand. My mom still thinks it’s a decorative cactus.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Rottweilers don't turn into neutered Chihuahuas.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“is. I'm not sure where the Arts part fits in Mixed Martial Arts.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Sit down,” Ty orders calmly. “Take me home.” “You’re mad because I told you I sleep with other girls?” He is mumbling to himself, almost as if it’s the first time he’s met a girl who isn’t okay with this. “Wow. You worked that out quickly. Are you sure you want to stay in the XWL and deprive the world of science of your incredible brain?”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed



“Heart stops beating. Brain shuts down. Hormones are raging.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“John Lennon quote. When his school teacher once asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, and he said happy, and she said that he didn't understand the question, and he answered that she didn't understand life.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“I’m a (kind of) strong, (semi) independent woman, and I can. Handle. Ty. Wilder.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“This shit would make a hyperactive kid snore his way through Halloween.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Jesse is not as charismatic as Ty, but they both fall under the category of people who can tell you to do just about anything, including rimming a dead donkey, and you’d do it.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed



“The university is located between San Francisco, Oakland and my internal wish to kill myself.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“I want to yell at him to stop. He’s driving in the Friend Zone. He cannot switch lanes to Boyfriend. That’s an illegal turn. Two double yellow lines.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“The guy I want is perfectly imperfect, and I'm completely fine with it.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“I’m living, but I'm not alive.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


“Apparently, after the excruciating pain, comes the numb. I’m at my numb phase.
I'm heart-crushingly numb.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed



“Women like men who play hockey, football, basketball and golf (okay, scratch golf). Women love men who know how to fight.”
― L.J. Shen, quote from Tyed


About the author

L.J. Shen
Born place: in San Francisco, The United States
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