Punching the Air

When you find yourself in dark places, there's always a light somewhere in that darkness, and even if that light is inside of you, you can illuminate your own darkness by shedding that light on the world.

Don't ever stop dreaming big But for now, put that dream on paper It's easier to carry around

We were a mob a gang ghetto a pack of wolves animals thugs hoodlums men They were kids having fun home loved supported protected full of potential boys

The only way to survive hell is to walk through

Blind Justice II All because we were in the wrong place we were in the wrong skins we were in the wrong time we were in the wrong bodies we were in the wrong country we were in the wrong were in the wrong in the wrong the wrong wrong All because they were in the right place they were in the right skins they were in the right time they were in the right bodies they were

school teaches you what to think not how to think and nobody raises their hands except to give the right answer

And maybe there are small cracks in our walls and we start to see a sliver of light shine through in each other

My lips are sealed but my words have a life of their own Even if they're locked up they'll bounce off three walls and slip between metal bars

English requires two mouths to speak and four ears to understand

My life, my whole damn life before that courtroom before that trial before that night was like Africa And this door leads to a slave ship And maybe jail maybe jail is is America

because where I come from jail or death were the two options she handed to us because where he came from the American Dream was the one option she handed to them So here we are, blind Lady Justice I see you, too

And we stepped onto the tipping scales of Lady Justice with her eyes blindfolded, peeking through slits because that rag is so fucking old worn-out, stretched thin, barely even there

They believed those lies about me and made themselves a whole other boy in their minds and replaced me with him

Umi told me to wear a gray suit because optics But that gray didn’t make me any less black

I became the color red boiling-hot lava rising to the surface I became a dragon and the planet Mars I became war I became rage and revenge

The bookshelves here are not walls They're closed windows and all I have to do is pull out one book to make these windows wide open

The story that I thought was this life didn't start on the day I went to that park The story that I think will be my life starts today Anything that happened before today is only the prequel the backstory the story behind the story Nothing before today matters

Eyes watching through filtered screens seeing every lie, reading every made-up word like a black hoodie counts as a mask like some shit I do with my fingers counts as gang signs like a few fights counts as uncontrollable rage like failing three classes counts as being dumb as fuck like everything that I am, that I've ever been counts as being guilty

And we stepped onto the tipping scales of Lady Justice

Saying down with the blacks but uplift the white race Raising the banner to the sun in haste Mobbed deep, hoods and capes Sun-dried and bloodstained Saying down with the blacks but uplift the white race Unjustly tried an indelible conviction the usual result of five shades of darker skin Justice unjust, black robes and pale face Didn't have a chance, they called us apes I wish I would have known the false smiles Evil intentions fulfilling their taste Why me? Why us? Justice unjust, black robes and pale faces?

They call it free time and it's the biggest lie because we are still here

Processed It's like I'm meat or wheat Made into a burger or deli slices Made into pasta or bread Processed Not the boy I was before the machine Before the braking down and pulling apart Before the adding and taking away I was made for easy, fast consumption Like food chains in the hood Umi said don't go there That you are what you eat Those jails that system has swallowed me whole

Grandma calls me *Master* Amal because she says I am the master of my own destiny I am the master of my own fate I am the master of my body, mind, and spirit So there was only room for one master and Clyde ain't it

Umi didn’t know that I had cut school to visit the art museum downtown I had cut school to sit in the park on a bench with my sketch pad drawing trees and leaves and sky and birds just to get my skills up just to understand the rules of line and texture and shading and black and white Just so I can break those rules And I didn’t need Ms. Rinaldi to tell me that I wasn’t advanced or I didn’t have history

On the day of my conviction I memorize my inmate number my crime my time On the day of my conviction I forget my school ID number my top three colleges my class schedule

Black Mona Lisa My umi's face is the most beautiful in the world Skin like sleeping in on snow days beneath thick blankets black Smile like an eighty-degree summer day in April bright Eyes like long subway rides looking out windows watching nothing and everything go by in the dark and letting my thoughts swim deep

The county jail behind the courtroom is called the tombs because it’s where the system buries their dead

The first book he gave me was “The Autobiography of Malcolm X” And I thought he was trying to tell me something because Malcolm was Muslim Malcolm was a thug Malcolm was in jail Malcolm was all about the people Malcolm went to Mecca Malcom said some shit Malcolm was shot dead The only book I gave Clyde was “The Rose That Grew from Concrete” I was definitely trying to tell him something because Tupac was a poet Tupac was a thug Tupac went to jail Tupac was all about the people Tupac went everywhere Tupac said some shit Tupac was shot dead Clyde didn’t know that Umi made me read all about Malcolm in eighth grade Clyde didn’t know that I read about Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela, too Clyde didn’t know that I’d read big books and watched documentaries on my own Clyde didn’t know that I’d reread that book in five days because after two months He asked me if I was done And by that point I had gotten through twelve books To take my mind off things for a little while, I said