Nocte

I’m doing all I can to stay afloat in a sea of insanity, but I’m drowning more and more each day.

I would plunge to the bottom of the ocean for you. I’d comb it for shells and make you a necklace and then hang myself with it. Because if you aren’t here, I don’t want to be either.

Words can harm people every bit as much as a weapon.

Insomniacs know that there is something about the night. A darkness, an energy, a mystery that shrouds things. It hides things at the same time as it illuminates them. It is this thing that allows us to examine our thoughts in a way that we can't during the day. It is this thing that brings truth and clarity.

I wrote this story the way it needed to be written. I couldn’t sugarcoat it. I couldn’t water it down. It is this way because the story demands it. I’m not sorry.

because sometimes that’s how life is. A puzzle made up of a million pieces, and when one piece doesn’t exactly fit, it throws the rest of them off.

There is nothing quite so terrifying as the descension of the human mind into insanity.

The only thing worse than drowning in grief is sharing a lifeboat with other drowning people. Besides, if anyone needs a grief group, it’s him.

What is it about that one motion, that one tiny thing, that always sticks in my head? It’s so stupid. Such a silly thing to focus on.

The only thing worse than drowning in grief is sharing a lifeboat with other drowning people.

By night, I am free. No one hears my monsters but me. My freedom is fragile, though, Because every morning, Over and over, The night is broken by the sun. It’s a good way to die.

As we walk, I know without looking where Dare is. It’s like I’m a planet and he’s my axis… or my sun. I feel his heat, I feel his presence, and I ache to lean into it, to fold into him, to absorb his strength.

Death is big,” Dare acknowledges. “But there are things bigger than that. If there’s not, then this is all for nothing. Life is worth nothing. Putting yourself out there, and taking chances and all that. All of that stuff is bollocks if it can just disappear in the end.

But just because we can’t see something doesn’t mean it’s not there.

My other half-- my twin brother, my Finn-- is crazy. I love him. More than life, more than anything. And even though I’m terrified he’ll suck me down with him, no one can save him but me.

And we can’t begin something beautiful when there is still so much ugliness around us.

fake it ‘til you make it. If you don’t feel good, pretend you do because eventually you will. It hasn’t worked yet, but I’m still holding out hope.

Serva me, servabo te. Save me and I will save you.

dying is like a ship that sails away for another destination.

He kisses me with abandon, like he’s not afraid of the consequences, like it’s only him and me, and there’s nothing else around us.

It’s like I’m a planet and he’s my axis… or my sun.

We all have little tricks we play on our minds to make life bearable.

What would you shave off for me if I died?” I would plunge to the bottom of the ocean for you. I’d comb it for shells and make you a necklace and then hang myself with it. Because if you aren’t here, I don’t want to be either.

Because traditions are soothing when everything else goes to hell.

Maybe because your mom just died in a car crash?

kismet always prevails and I’m someone he might like to know.

He deserves to be a focus.