B is for Burglar

Personally, I'd rather grow old alone than in the company of anyone I've met so far. I don't experience myself as lonely, incomplete, or unfulfilled, but I don't talk about that much. It seems to piss people off--especially men. (Kinsey Millhone)

Insecure people have a special sensitivity for anything that finally confirms their own low opinion of themselves.

I'm a born liar myself and I know how it's done. You stick as close to the truth as you can. You pretend to volunteer a few bits of information, but the facts are all carefully selected for effect.

There's nothinng like an outsider's idle glance to make you conscious of your own environment.

It's hard to keep passing myself off as a grown-up when a piece of me is still six years old and utterly at the mercy of authority.

He stared at me. His breathing made that wheezing sound that fat people sometimes make.

There’s no place in a P.I.’s life for impatience, faintheartedness, or sloppiness. I understand the same qualifications apply for housewives.

The last thing I need is the sheriff on my case. That's who I thought you were, as a matter of fact. They got women sheriffs these days, did you know that? Sherifettes." "So I've heard." "What about you?" she asked. "How'd you become a detective. That's a weird way to make a living, isn't it?" She was becoming real chatty now that I was on my way out and I wondered if I might pump her for more information. She seemed eager to prolong the contact, like someone who's been cooped up too long with a pack of preschool kids. "I sort of backed into detective work," I said, "but it beats selling shoes.

The percolator gave a few last burps and subsided while he reached for two big blue-and-white mugs. One had an overall design of bunny rabbits humping. The other portrayed elephants similarly occupied. I tried not to look. The thing I’ve worried about for years is how dinosaurs mated, especially those great big spiny ones. Someone told me once they did it in water, which helped support all that weight, but I find it hard to believe dinosaurs were that smart. It didn’t seem likely with those tiny pinched heads. I shook myself back to reality.

Instead of learning the rules, she’d learned to disappear.

Now and then when some dog set up a howl in the back, one or the other of the cats would appear to smile faintly.

Pam is petite, a bristly little chihuahua of a human being. She is the only woman I ever met who claims to be ten years older than she actually is so everyone will tell her how young she looks.

We been in this house forty year,” he said. “Bought it back in nineteen and forty-three for four thousand dollar. Bet you never heard of a house that cheap. Now it’s worth one hunnert and fifteen thousand. Just the lot we’re settin’ on. That don’t even count the house. They can knock