Quotes from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“I need to learn to recognize and identify these danger signs when I see them, and not brush them off as "eccentricities," "lovable oddities," or "a sign that he s crying out for help and the comforting of a codependent nurturer that only I, Princess Enabler, can provide. Bad boyfriends don't disguise themselves; their girlfriends do it for them. ”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“Whaddaya mean 'old maids,' ha? The term is 'unclaimed treasure,' buddy, 'unclaimed treasure!”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“Oh boy. Too drunk to hold on to a whiskey and Coke and the word "pretty." That's not a combination with a positive outcome. Not good at all. That's the secret password that usually leaves me trying to find a ride home in the morning.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“So I graduated from college with a degree in journalism and was ready to find my dream job at a newspaper in addition to one good man who owned his own car and was certain about his sexuality, my two new, revised qualifying criteria for a potential date.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“I looked around. This house only the night before had been a home, and serves as a storage locker for memories that I could barely remember and a bunch of things I'd rather forget.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“You are basically a flophouse and a pimp away from Pepcid rehab, you know that?" I informed Nana.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“Be honest with yourself; set the alarm for the time the Real You will get up, not the Ambitious You, because the Ambitious You doesn't really exist.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“Weddings, I began to understand, were vile, filthy things when they ran amuck.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

About the author

Popular quotes

“As a boy I heard this story in church.
A man was patching a pitched roof of a tall building when he began sliding off. As he neared the edge of the roof he prayed, "Save me, Lord, and I'll go to church every Sunday, I'll give up drinking, I'll be the best man this city has ever known."
As he finished his prayer, a nail snagged onto his overalls and saved him. The man looked up to the sky and shouted, "Never mind, God. I took care of it myself."
How true of us.”
― Richard Paul Evans, quote from The Walk

“To enter heaven is to become more human than you ever succeeded in being on earth; to enter hell, is to be banished from humanity.”
― C.S. Lewis, quote from The Problem of Pain

“Rakkety Rakkety Rakkety Tam, the drums are beatin’ braw. Rakkety Rakkety Rakkety Tam, are ye marchin’ off tae war?   A warrior from the borders came, a buckler o’er his shoulder, a claymore swingin’ at his side, there’s no’ a beast who’s bolder!   O Rakkety Tam has sold his sword, Ah scarce believe he’s done it. He swore an oath untae a fool, who took his pledge upon it!”
― Brian Jacques, quote from Rakkety Tam

“My laps-meter, the first caliper of the soul and the first hope of bridging the dread chasm that has rent the soul of Western man ever since the famous philosopher Descartes ripped body loose from mind and turned the very soul into a ghost that haunts its own house.”
― Walker Percy, quote from Love in the Ruins

“و أخذ النجم واهب الحياة يبزغ ببطء حتى صار مستديراً متوهجاً لونه الأحمر في كبد السماء”
― Jean Craighead George, quote from Julie of the Wolves

Interesting books

About BookQuoters

BookQuoters is a community of passionate readers who enjoy sharing the most meaningful, memorable and interesting quotes from great books. As the world communicates more and more via texts, memes and sound bytes, short but profound quotes from books have become more relevant and important. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. For all of us, quotes are a great way to remember a book and to carry with us the author’s best ideas.

We thoughtfully gather quotes from our favorite books, both classic and current, and choose the ones that are most thought-provoking. Each quote represents a book that is interesting, well written and has potential to enhance the reader’s life. We also accept submissions from our visitors and will select the quotes we feel are most appealing to the BookQuoters community.

Founded in 2023, BookQuoters has quickly become a large and vibrant community of people who share an affinity for books. Books are seen by some as a throwback to a previous world; conversely, gleaning the main ideas of a book via a quote or a quick summary is typical of the Information Age but is a habit disdained by some diehard readers. We feel that we have the best of both worlds at BookQuoters; we read books cover-to-cover but offer you some of the highlights. We hope you’ll join us.