The Other Bennet Sister

Sometimes the very best stuff can seem quite plain, until one examines it closely. It is only then that one sees its true quality.

And anyway, in our house, no-one is obliged to sparkle. Which, I find, makes it far more likely that they might.

...in truth, there is no state that better demonstrates real firmness of affection than the ability to remain quietly comfortable together without conversation.

Watching what happens isn’t the same as being part of it.

It is my situation I dislike, not myself.

There are times when happiness must be fought for, if we are to have any chance at all of achieving it.

It’s hard to persuade anyone, especially a man, that your regard is worth having if you have none for yourself.

But it is often difficult for us to recognise what virtue looks like because we so readily confuse it with pleasure. Pleasure can deliver is enjoyment - the feelings we derive from good food, good conversations, the contemplation of beauty - but these things do not last. Enjoyments are transient, but true happiness endures. That is its distinguishing quality.

It might seem an unromantic circumstance; but in truth, there is no state that better demonstrates real firmness of affection than the ability to remain quietly comfortable together without conversation.

The most important habit to conquer was the habit of misery itself. Nothing was so inimical to happiness as the settled conviction it was not for her. It was a conviction that ran very deep in her; but she knew she must fight to rise above it.

They did not consider happiness a matter of chance or destiny. Instead they did everything in their power to cultivate it, prizing generosity over petulance, preferring kindness to umbrage, and and always encouraging laughter rather than complaint.

She had gradually discovered that the best response to glorious, unexpected happiness was not to seek explanation for its appearance but simply to embrace it and be glad.

It seems to me that, in the real world, it is impossible to be guided solely by either the impulses of feeling or my rational calculation. Neither is likely to make us happy. In my own view, we have need of them both. Wisdom, I suppose, lies in knowing when to call upon one and when on the other.

That is the power of poetry,” he said simply. “It allows us to imagine ourselves anew, if we will permit it to do so. It reveals to us the hidden wishes of our hearts.

It is better to accept what I can do than to yearn hopelessly after what I cannot. “Know thyself”, as the Greeks tell us.

True beauty, he declared, had nothing to do with outward appearance. It came from within, the product of a well-regulated mind and a properly formed understanding. These qualities, and not a pretty face, are the real measure of a woman’s worth.

She had learnt from Mrs. Bennet that without beauty no real and lasting happiness was attainable. It never occurred to her to question what she’d been taught.

Enjoyments are transient, but true happiness endures. That is its distinguishing quality.

Mary looked shyly at her reflection. She would not go as far as handsome, but she thought she would not stand out as awkward or strange; and that was enough for her.

As the evening went on, Mary felt herself steadily diminished by this knowledge, imagining herself fading from view, minute by minute, hour by hour, until she felt as though she had disappeared altogether, leaving nothing behind to remind anyone that she had ever been there at all.

for where there is no willingness to make an effort, there is usually little likelihood of success.

I see plainly enough that you don’t like to make a fuss about dress—that you dislike having attention drawn to you. But there are times when the best way to ensure you are not remarkable is to conform to the expectations of those around you.

Then It occurred to me that I was coming at it in quite the wrong way. I was trying to think it into submission. I began to fear I might be about to destroy the very thing I wanted to understand. It struck me that a poem was perhaps too fragile an object to bear the weight of too much rational examination

I might add in my own defence that if I had loved you less, I might have ventured more. It was hard to be bold when I was only too aware of what I stood to lose.

Don’t believe you can find happiness celebrating the good fortune of others. An eternity spent smiling and cooing over the good luck of your friends makes the heart sick in the end.

It has all the virtues of an apology with none of the embarrassment of an explanation.

You dress as you do because you do not believe you deserve anything better, and in doing so, you communicate that low opinion of yourself to everyone that sees you.

Resignation was clearly to be preferred to the alternative, but perhaps only just.