“You carried my heart in your hands tonight," he said. "But I have felt as if you carried it long before that.”
“I would remain nearer you for what time there is."
"Gone in one faerie sigh," she quoted.
Leather-clad fingers brushed over her short hair, rested on her cheek. "I can hold my breath.”
“People said that video games were bad because they made you numb to death, made you register entrails splattering across a screen as a sign of success. In that moment, Val thought that the real problem with games was that the player was suppossed to try everything. If there was a cave, you went in it. If there was a mysterious stranger, you talked to him. If there was a map, you followed it. But in games, you had a hundred million billion lives and Val only had this one.”
“It's the flaw that brings out the beauty.”
“We got it." Val grinned and lifted her fist. "Wonder twin powers activate!"
Ruth grinned back, knocking her fist into Val's. "Shape of two fucking lunatics.”
“You didn't think I really liked you? Do you think I really like you now?"
He turned toward her, uncertainty in his face."You did go quite a lot of effort to be having this conversation, but... I don't want to read too much of what I hope into that."
Val stretched out beside him, resting her head in the crook of his arm. "What do you hope?"
He pulled her close, hands careful not to touch her wounds as they wrapped around her. "I hope that you feel for me as I do for you," he said, his voice like a sigh against her throat.
And how is that?" she asked, her lips so close to his jaw that she could taste the salt of his skin when she moved them.
You carried my heart in your hands tonight," he said. "But I have felt as if you carried it long before that."
She smiled and let her eyes drift closed. They lay there together, under the bridge, city lights burning outside the windows like a sky full of falling stars, as they slid off into sleep”
“She thought of something her mother had told her when she'd finally broken up with one of her most dysfunctional boyfriends. When a man tells you he's going to hurt you, believe it. They always warn you and they're always right.”
“You both ... you both saved me?"
"Come on," said Luis. "You make it sound like it was hard for Val to go to the Unseelie Court, strike a deal with Roiben, challenge Mabry to a duel, win back your heart, and then get back here during rush hour.”
“One fine day, in the middle of the night, two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other. They pulled out their swords and shot one another. One deaf cop, on the beat heard the noise, and came and shot the two dead boys.”
“So you'll teach me?" Val asked.
Ravus nodded agin. "I will make you as terrible as you desire."
"I don't want to be - ," she started, but he held up his hand.
"I know you're very brave," he said.
"Or stupid."
"And stupid. Brave and Stupid." Ravus smiled, but then his smile sagged. "But nothing can stop you from being terrible once you've learned how.”
“I like all the things that make you monstrous.”
“If we have to be cat burglars, I'm going to see what' to steal in the fridge."
We're trying to find evidence she's the poisoner. Just a thought before you start putting random things in your mouth." Ruth shrugged and walked past Val.”
“But the Courts aren't places humans are supposed to be, especially the Unseelie Court. Most faeries won't even go there."
"We have to go - we have to get Ravus's heart. He's going to die if we don't."
"What are we going to do? Go down there and ask for it?"
"Pretty much.”
“Great. Lookout. I'm a lookout. Another thing to put on my college applications. What do I do if I see someone?"
Val looked back. "I'm not sure, actually.”
“She is crazy. Head to head with an ogre. Loony Lolli, Sketchy Dave, Crazy Val. You're all a bunch of freaks."
Val made a formal bow, dipping her head in their direction, and then sat on the blanket.
Loony Luis, more likely," Lolli said, kicking her flip-flop in his direction.
Luis One-Eye," Dave said.
Luis smirked. "Bug-head Dave."
Princess Luis," Dave said. "Prince Valiant."
Val laughed, thinking of the first time Dave had called her that. "How about Dreaded Dave?"
Luis leaned over, grabbing his brother in a headlock, both of them rolling on the cloth, and said, "How about Baby Brother? Baby Brother Dave?"
Hey," Lolli said. "What about me? I want to be a princess like Luis.”
“A stray dog, I might understand," she said. "But this? You are too softhearted."
No, Mabry," Ravus said. "I am not." He looked in Val's direction. "I think she wants to die."
Maybe you can help her after all," Mabry said. "You're good at helping people die.”
“Stop thinking," he said.
I have to think," said val. "You said I was supposed to concentrate."
Thinking makes you slow. You need to move as I move. Right now, you're merely following my lead."
How can I know where you're going to go before you've gone there? That's stupid."
It's no different from knowing where an opponent might move. How do you know where a ball is likely to go on the lacrosse field?"
The only things you know about lacrosse are the things I told you," Val said.
I might say the same about you and sword fighting." He stopped. "There. You did it. You were so busy snapping at me that you didn't notice you were doing it."
Val frowned, too annoyed to be pleased, but too pleased to say anything more.”
“She'd always been a little contemptuous of beauty, as though it was something you had to trade away some other vital thing for.”
“Everything was strange and beautiful and swollen with possibilities.”
“I'm sorry I kissed you- it was selfish and it upset you- but you can't ask me to pretend I didnt want to.”
“It demeans you to cover rotten meat with honey. I know what I am. What would you want with a monster?"
"Everything.”
“As Val jumped down onto the litter-strewn concrete after them, she thought how insane it was to follow two people she didn't know into the bowels of the subway, but instead of being afraid, she felt glad. She would make all her own decisions now, even if they were ruinous ones. It was the same pleasurable feeling as tearing a piece of paper into tiny, tiny pieces.”
“I'm not very good at explaining things," she said. "But I think you have beautiful eyes. I love the gold in them. I love that they're different from my eyes- I see mine all the time and I'm bored with them.”
“I'm afraid that whatever I touch is spoilt by the contact."
"I'm not scared of being spoiled," Val said.”
“Startled, he loosed his grasp and she pulled free. He clutched her arm, but she spun around and pressed her mouth to his.
His lips were rough, chapped. She felt the sting of fangs against her bottom lip. He made a sharp sound in the back of his throat and closed his eyes. Mouth opening under hers. The smell of him- of cold, damp stone- made her head swim. One kiss slid into another and it was perfect, was exactly right, was real.”
“If life were like a video game, she would have used her power move to whip Jen in the air and knock her against the wall with two strikes of a lacrosse stick. Of course, if life really were like a video game, Val would probably have to do that in a bikini and with giant breasts, each one made of separately animated polygons.”
“Cold?" Ravus echoed. He took her arm and rubbed it between his hands, watching them as though they were betraying him. "Better?" He asked warily.
His skin felt hot, even through the cloth of her shirt, his touch was both soothing and electric.
She leaned into him without thinking. His thighs parted, rough black cloth scratching against her jeans as she moved between his long legs. His eyes half-lidded as he pushed himself off the desk, their bodies sliding together, his hands still holding hers. Then, suddenly, he froze.”
“Val and Ruth had been friends forever, for so long that Val was used to being the overshadowed one, the "normal" one, the one who set up the witty one-liners, not the one who delivered them. She liked that role; it made her feel safe. Robin to Ruth's Batman. Chewbaca to her Han Solo.”
“You carried my heart in your hands tonight," he said, "But I have felt as if you carried it long before that.”
“And we clung to each other like we were drowning because, in a way, we were.”
“- Amerikanac zapravo ne voli ništa drugo osim svog automobila: ni ženu ni dijete ni domovinu čak mu ni bankovni račun nije na prvom mjestu (u stvari on uopće ne voli taj bankovni račun ni izdaleka toliko koliko to misle stranci jer on će potrošiti gotovo sav svoj novac ili baš sav za tako reći bilo što samo ako je dovoljno bezvrijedno) nego njegovo motorno vozilo. Jer automobil je postao naš nacionalni simbol seksa. Mi ne možemo pravo uživati ni u čemu ako se ne moramo bar jednu uličicu voziti do toga. A s druge strane cijela naša sredina i odgoj i obrazovanje zabranjuju nam sve što je kradomično i potajno. Zato se mi danas moramo rastaviti od supruge da bismo od ljubavnice otklonili i tako dalje. A kao rezultat toga američka je žena postala hladna i aseksualna; ona je projicirala svoj libido na automobil ne samo zato što njegov sjaj, njegove tehničke napravice i njegova pokreljivost udovoljavaju njezinoj taštini i nesposobnosti (zbog odjeće koju joj je nametnuo zemaljski savez trgovaca na malo) da hoda nego zato što je on neće izgnječiti ni raskuštrati niti je svu oznojiti i uznerediti. Zato da bi je uopće još nekako mogao osvojiti i potčiniti američki je muškarac morao usvojiti automobil. Makar zbog toga živio u iznajmljenoj štakorskoj rupi on ga mora on će ga ne samo imati nego i svake godine obnavljati da ponovno zadobije prvobitno djevičansto i nikom ga neće posuđivati, nijednoj tuđoj ruci neće dopustiti da ikad upozna posljednju vječito neoskvrnjenu i vječito požudnu intimnost njegovih pedala i poluga pa iako nema kamo ići s njim ili ako ima onda ne ide onamo gdje bi ga mogla nagrditi bilo kakva ogrebotina ili mrlja ipak svako nedjejno prijepodne provodi u njegovu pranju, mazanju i poliranju jer radeći to on miluje tijelo žene koja mu je već odavno uskratila pristup u svoj krevet.”
“There are no preconditions for jealousy. You don't have to be right, you don't have to be reasonable. Take Othello. He was neither right nor reasonable, and Desdemona ended up dead. I wouldn't mind Leanne ending up dead. I wouldn't mind exploding her into fireworks of peacock and pearl.”
“11:20 a.m.
This is my fabulous life: the Sex God left for Whakatane last month and he has taken my heart with him.
11:25 a.m.
Not literally, of course, otherwise there would be a big hole in my nunga-nungas.
11:28 a.m.
And also I would be dead. Which quite frankly would be a blessing in disguise.”
“Looking through my bedroom window, out into the moonlight and the unending smoke-colored snow, I could see the lights in the windows of all the other houses on our hill and hear the music rising from them up the long, steadily falling night. I turned the gas down, I got into bed. I said some words to the close and holy darkness, and then I slept.”
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