“Just tell me one thing before you leave, Ava.” His voice prickles at my senses… His face is serious, but still stunning. “How loud do you think you’ll scream when I fuck you?”
“God!” I scream.
“No, baby, that’s me”
“I want to look after you forever.” He whispers, pressing his lips against my temple.”
“Ava, you should know that once I’ve had you, you’re mine.”
“Ava, the sexual tension batting between you and that man was so fucking super charged, even I was horny!”
“I don't want to be pencilled in anywhere, pencil can be erased.”
“I’m going to get lost in you.”
“No!” I push him away from me. “You’re not manipulating me with your delicious Godliness!”
He grins that roguish grin. “You think I’m a God?”
I huff, turning back to the mirror. His head is expanding at a rate so fast, I might be forced to jump out the bathroom window before I’m squashed against a wall.”
“There's only one thing in the world that turns me on. And I love her in lace.”
“The sex is just sex. I can't get close enough to you. The control is because I'm frightened to death that something will happen to you...that you'll be taken away from me. I've waited too long for you, Ava. I'll do anything to keep you safe. I've lived a life with little control or care. Believe me, I need you..please...please don't leave me.”
“Everything is so much more bearable with you around, Ava.”
“You're painfully beautiful and all mine. Kiss me.”
“Alcohol makes for loose lips and loose lips sink ships.”
“You’ll always need me, Ava. I’m going to make sure of it. Now, let’s see if we can fuck some sense into you.”
“I need to have all of you, Ava. Say I can have all of you.”
…
“Take me.” I say quietly against his lips.’
“Oh, I will.”
“No, it's the way he looks at you, like you're the centre of his universe.”
“If we were alone, you would be against that wall and I would be fucking you stupid.”
“He shakes his head. ‘You’re different. I told you, Ava, I’ll trample anyone who tries to get in my way. Even you.”
“Watch your mouth,’ he cautions me. ‘I’ve told you before, Ava. I’ll do whatever it takes.’
‘For what?’ My voice is barely a whisper.
‘To keep you”
“I’m suddenly catapulted to Central Jesse Cloud Nine.”
“Ava, when a man gets a calculator out at the end of a meal to work out what you owe. It's usually not a good sign.”
“I want to stay stuck to you.”
“Leave out what you expected and tell me what you got.”
“I had once been naïve enough to believe that all would be well if you lived by the rules. Good things happened to good people, blessed are the meek, et cetera, et cetera. How disillusioned I have become since then. It hurt, because I wondered now what all the discipline, repression, and suppression had been for if it had not procured me the thing I had most wanted, and it certainly did not guarantee happiness.”
“No one ever does anything but what he wants to do—'enjoys'—within the possibilities open to him. If I change a tire, it's because I enjoy it more than being stranded.”
“Yes,” he said. “But I wonder . . . I’ve a peculiar feeling that I may never see you again. It is as if I were one of those minor characters in a melodrama who gets shuffled offstage without ever learning how things turn out.”
“I can appreciate the feeling,” I said. “My own role sometimes makes me want to strangle the author. But look at it this way: inside stories seldom live up to one’s expectations. Usually they are grubby little things, reducing down to the basest of motives when all is known. Conjectures and illusions are often the better possessions.”
“Memory, therefore, not simply as the resurrection of one’s private past, but an immersion in the past of others, which is to say: history - which one both participates in and is a witness to, is a part of and apart from. Everything, therefore, is present in his mind at once, as if each element were reflecting the light of all the others, and at the same time emitting its own unique and unquenchable radiance.”
“Embarrassment is the worst! It's the feeling of having your entire body go numb and not knowning what to do with yourself for that one moment”
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