The Start of Me and You

In friendship we are all debtors. We all owe each other for a thousand small kindnesses, for little moments of grace in the chaos.

Knowing what happens is different from knowing how it happens. And the getting there is the best part.

Because with true friends, no one is keeping score. But it still feels good to repay them – even in the tiniest increments.

Love extra, even if it means you hurt extra,too

Like you had been drowning, and the book was air.

Ryan Chase was my eighth-grade collage, aspirational and wide-eyed. But Max was the first bite of grilled cheese on a snowy day, the easy fit of my favorite jeans, that one old song that made it onto every playlist. Peanut-butter Girl Scout cookies instead of an ornate cake. Not glamorous or idealized or complicated. Just me.

Nothing, not even sadness could be greater than the sum of us.

Okay," he said, leaning closer to me. "I have a proposition for you." Dear God, let it be marriage, I thought.

We're all Elizabeths when we need to be.

You're always preparing yourself for the thing that is most likely to happen, instead of hoping for the thing that you most want to happen.

In books, sometimes the foreshadowing is so obvious that you know what’s going to happen. But knowing what happens isn’t the same as knowing how it happens. Getting there is the best part.

Sometimes we get it wrong the first time. But you only have to get it right once.

Darkness might keep flooding in, but I finally had just enough light to find the way back to myself.

I think I've loved you since that first day.

I know it's difficult to bare your heart, but it's the least stupid thing in the world.

The point is that we already know it doesn’t work out, but we reread them anyway, because the good stuff that comes before the ending is worth it.” This

I think I might love you too. Oh, please. You do.

I may be stumbling through these steps, but at least I'm stumbling forward.

He grinned. "I knew you loved me, Tessa." Tessa's cheeks reddened. "One more word, and I WILL have Morgan give you the consent lecture.

We all owe each other for a thousand small kindnesses, for little moments of grace in the chaos.

I wanted to live in Lucy and Ricky’s world, where the blunders of life were righted in one neat half hour. They made it look easy.

I don’t remember that.” He shook his head. “Of course you don’t. You were in another world, completely occupied with whatever you were reading.

Sure, QuizBowl wasn't a cool activity to join and, yeah, the idea of answering difficult questions in front of an audience terrified me. But it wasn't anything like the fear that accompanied my drowning nightmare - harrowing and visceral. No, this fear made me feel fizzy. Hopeful. In fact, this fear felt like waking up do discover I am still here.

Our town was too big for people to know everything about you, but just small enough to clench down on one defining moment like teeth on prey. Won the spelling bee in fourth grade? You are Dictionary Girl forever. Laughed a little too hard in sixth grade? You will still be the Guy Who Peed His Pants as you walk across the stage to receive your diploma. And I was the Girl Whose Boyfriend Drowned.

I used to think rewatching and rereading were embarrassingly boring pastimes. But there is something to be said for how comforting it is to already know what happens. There is no such luxury in real life. Soon

It was easy for me to be honest with him because there was nothing to lose.

There I was, clinging to the scraps of happiness that I could finally feel again: coffee and books and an afternoon with my best friend. What right did I have, when he was gone?

This was never about getting there fast. This was about being sure of my steps forward. They always call it falling in love, but for me? It was also a choice.