The Foxhole Court

It’s not the world that’s cruel. It’s the people in it.

Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing, but he thought perhaps he liked it.

Remember this feeling. This is the moment you stop being the rabbit.

As he slipped the lock into place again he realized his hand was trembling. He held up his shaky fingers where he could see them better and wondered at the equally weak flutter in his chest. Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing, but he thought perhaps he liked it.

Oh, Neil, unpredictable as he is unreal.

A group of people shouldered their way up to the bar counter at Neil's back, pushing him into Andrew. Andrew didn't budge beneath his weight. He was something solid to lean against, something violent and fierce and unmoving. Neil couldn't remember what it felt like to have someone hold him up. It was terrifying and liberating all at once. His life was out of his control now; he was giving it to Andrew and hoping Andrew would keep it safe.

It sounded like a dream; it tasted like damnation. He

This is my reassured face," Neil said, pointing up at his blank expression.

Riko's smile could have frozen hell. "I'm not scared of Kevin. I know him." "You're going to eat those words," Neil said. "You're going to choke on them.

University, he said quietly. It sounded like a dream; it tasted like damnation.

It sounded like a dream; it tasted like damnation.

Family means something different with us because it has to. It's not about blood. It's not even about who we like. It's about who Andrew's willing to protect.

God damn it, Minyard. This is why we can't have nice things.

He glanced up at the sky, but the stars were washed out behind the glare of the stadium lights. He wondered – not for the first time – if his mother was looking down at him. He hoped not. She’d beat him to hell and back if she saw him sitting around moping like that.

Keys meant Neil had explicit permission to be here and do what he liked. They meant he belonged.

It's not the world that's cruel," Neil said. "It's the people in it.

Don't look back, don't slow down, and don't trust anyone. Be anyone but himself, and never be anyone for too long.

Then it's time to stop being the worst," Wymack said. "It's time to fly.

It’s about second chances, Neil. Second, third, fourth, whatever, as long as you get at least one more than what anyone else wanted to give you.

Exy was a bastard sport, an evolved sort of lacrosse on a soccer-sized court with the violence of ice hockey, and Neil loved every part of it.

He looked at Kevin again. Kevin didn't recognize him, but maybe some part of him remembered the boy he'd met so many years ago. Neil's past was locked in Kevin's memories. It was proof he existed, same as this game they both played. Kevin was proof Neil was real. Maybe Kevin was also the best chance Neil had at knowing when to leave again. If he lived, practiced, and played with Kevin, he'd know when Kevin started to get suspicious.

Andrew was smiling, but Neil knew his cheer didn't mean he was going to play nice. He'd been smiling when he smashed a racquet into Neil's stomach, too. Nicholas

It went against everything Neil knew to give in, but he'd chosen this path. He'd chosen Andrew.

Whether Neil left today or tomorrow or next week, he'd leave alone. Two, five, ten years from now, if Neil was even still alive, he'd still be alone. He could be anyone, anywhere in the world, but he'd be alone until the day he died. He'd never trust anyone enough to let them in.

It's fine, Coach," Andrew said, catching up to them. He touched Neil's back on his way by, fingers light enough to give Neil goose bumps, but didn't slow on his way to Kevin's side.

Make them love you, make them hate you, I don't care. Just make them look at you.

University," he said quietly. It sounded like a dream; it tasted like damnation. He