Dorothy Parker · 320 pages
Rating: (1.3K votes)
“In youth, it was a way I had,
To do my best to please.
And change, with every passing lad
To suit his theories.
But now I know the things I know
And do the things I do,
And if you do not like me so,
To hell, my love, with you.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“Inventory:
"Four be the things I am wiser to know:
Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe.
Four be the things I'd been better without:
Love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt.
Three be the things I shall never attain:
Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
Three be the things I shall have till I die:
Laughter and hope and a sock in the eye.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“If wild my breast and sore my pride,
I bask in dreams of suicide,
If cool my heart and high my head
I think 'How lucky are the dead.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“A Very Short Song
Once, when I was young and true,
Someone left me sad-
Broke my brittle heart in two;
And that is very bad.
Love is for unlucky folk,
Love is but a curse.
Once there was a heart I broke;
And that, I think, is worse.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“Because your eyes are slant and slow,
Because your hair is sweet to touch,
My heart is high again; but oh,
I doubt if this will get me much.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“I know I have been happiest at your side;
But what is done, is done, and all’s to be.
And small the good, to linger dolefully-
Gayly it lived, and gallantly it died.
I will not make you songs of hearts denied,
And you, being man, would have no tears of me,
And should I offer you fidelity,
You’d be, I think, a little terrified.
Yet this the need of woman, this her curse:
To range her little gifts, and give, and give,
Because the throb of giving’s sweet to bear.
To you, who never begged me vows or verse,
My gift shall be my absence, while I live;
But after that, my dear, I cannot swear.”
― Dorothy Parker, quote from The Complete Poems of Dorothy Parker
“But I’ve only been at this mage business four years. I have some catching up to do—”
― Tamora Pierce, quote from Melting Stones
“I declare! Sometimes it seems to me that every time a new piece of machinery comes into the door some of our wits fly out the window!”
― Dorothy Canfield Fisher, quote from Understood Betsy
“Wait,” Eric said. “Do you have any camouflaged condoms?”
“Camouflaged?” The cashier’s forehead crinkled in concentration. “I don’t think so. We have every flavor and color imaginable, but I don’t think we have any camouflaged.”
“Why would you need a camouflaged condom?” Rebekah asked.
“So you won’t see me coming.”
― Olivia Cunning, quote from Wicked Beat
“Sometimes it is only a True Friend who knows what we mean when we try to speak. Somebody who has spent a lot of time with us, and listens carefully to what we are trying to say, and tries to understand.”
― Cressida Cowell, quote from How to Cheat a Dragon's Curse
“Tears are kind of like urine. There is only so long you can hold them in.”
― Julie Buxbaum, quote from Tell Me Three Things
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