Mini Shopaholic

Never give up on something you really want. However impossible things seem, there's always a way.

You don't need to change one hair. One freckle. One little toe. And if its me thats made you feel you should do this..then there's something wrong with me. -Luke Brandon

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

I bet he never goes on YouTube. He's too busy. It's only tragic cases like you and me who are always online.

You won’t let me buy any clothes. Now you won’t let me buy a road map, either! I need to spend some money or I’m going to go crazy!

I need good coffee!" I say in horror. "It's my only luxury!" I can't live with my parents and drink bad coffee. It's not humanly possible. Becky talking about cutting back with her parents.

There are some things I don't understand about Jess and never will. No wedding dress. No flowers. No photo album. No champagne. The only thing she got out of her wedding was a husband. (I mean, obviously the husband is the main point when you get married. Absolutely. That goes without saying. But still, not even a new pair of shoes?)

A party like this isn't about the surprise factor. It's about someone going to so much trouble that it just... overwhelms you.

Maybe my identity's been stolen. Or maybe I was sleep-shopping!

You'd never get tired of a pony. It's a classic. It's, like, the Chanel jacket of toys.

You’re perfect,’ he says almost fiercely. ‘You don’t need to change one hair. One freckle. One little toe. And if it’s me that’s made you feel you should do this … then there’s something wrong with me.

But, come on, even the waiting list for that new Prada bag was only a year. No school can be more exclusive than a limited-edition Prada bag, surely?

Mum always says the right thing. She always makes everything better.

Why did he have to choose tonight to turn into the perfect husband?

I can't help giving her the Mummy Once-Over myself, and she's one of those mothers who wears Crocs over nubbly homemade socks. (Why would you do that? Why?)

I wonder if Luke would take a hit of tomato ketchup for me. I might ask him later. Just casually.

Spoiled?" Mum cuts her off with a laugh. "Nonsense! There's nothing wrong with Minnie, is there, my precious? She knows her own mind!" She strokes Minnie's hair fondly, then looks up again. "Becky, love, you were exactly the same at her age. Exactly the same.

Love. This is a lorry, not a Ferrari.

In honor of my goddaughter’s christening, I will perform ‘The Real Slim Shady,’ by Eminem,” he says confidently.

Trust Jess to get engaged all discreetly and not say a word. I'd have run straight in, saying, "Guess what? Look at my pebble ring!

It'll be George Michael all over again," Dad mutters darkly to Mum, and I give a sharp intake of breath. That is AGAINST our family code. No one was supposed to mention George Michael ever again. We even turn off "Carless Whisper" whenever it comes on.

I've taken over the guest room wardrobe too- plus, I've arranged all my shoes on the bookshelves on the landing. (I put the books in boxes. No one ever read them. anyway.)

A mother in J Brand skinny jeans with an impeccably dressed daughter walks past, giving me the Mummy Once-over, and I flinch. Since I had Minnie, I’ve learned that the Mummy Once-over is even more savage than the Manhattan Once-over. In the Mummy Once-over, they don’t just assess and price your clothes to the nearest penny in one sweeping glance. Oh no. They also take in your child’s clothes, pram brand, nappy bag, snack choice and whether your child is ­ smiling, snotty or screaming. Which I know is a lot to take in, in a one-second glance, but believe me, mothers are multi-taskers.