“But I can’t leave, not yet. I’ll stay with her until sunrise. If I brace my feet, I won’t slide. I can rest my cheek on the roof tile and still see her. Pacing. Pulling her hair.
“I’ll fix you,” I tell her. “I promise.”
Even though I don’t know how.
It’s better than good-bye.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“It’s disgusting. They melted my girl down and poured her into their mold. And this perversion is what she cooled into. I can’t be near her. Can’t see her, smell her, hear her voice chirping like a bird.
I tell her the same thing I’ve been whispering every night on the roof. “I’m sorry. It’s my fault.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“In a few minutes nobody will know what I did. Everything will be perfect again. Except for my life.
[Oscar Banks]”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“she drew me. But not who I see in the mirror. Nia saw the Oscar i keep hidden. And she put him on paper.
Nobody sees the real me.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“Yo hago lo que quiero.
No. Solo haces lo que cabrea a tus padres. Quizás deberías hacer lo que quieres sin que te importe si a tus padres les guste o no.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“We don’t talk; it’s family night, not miracle night.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“Cookie!" The kid holds up a carrot with the feathery green still attached to the top.
"Seriously?"
The woman gives me a wide-eyed don't say anything look and walks away fast.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“You have points on the tip of your ears." she tilts her head and stares at me." like a big, tall elf.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“¿A quién debería de odiar más? ¿Al que lo pide? ¿O al que se lo da?”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
“Es lo que quieres que sea. Esa es la razón por la que me gusta el arte. Nadie se confunde.”
― Pam Bachorz, quote from Candor
Pam Bachorz
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“don’t see what this has to do with us.” I say back, “Does everything have to be about you? Can you not project yourself outside yourself? Can you not take on another’s life for your own benefit?”
― Richard Ford, quote from Canada
“Things mechanical are like the ladies,’ continued Toby. ‘You need to understand their ways. If you understand them, they’ll do what you want from the start. If you don’t, they’ve got you. And then God help you.”
― Robert Aickman, quote from The Wine-Dark Sea
“He mobilised the English language and sent it into battle.”
― Winston S. Churchill, quote from Churchill: The Power of Words
“But don’t think for a moment I don’t know what you’re up to. And I won’t always be so easily manipulated.” “Ma-nip-u-lated.” Peter scowled. “I do not know what this means.” Her chin thrust out. “Oh, yes you do.”
― Kim Vogel Sawyer, quote from Waiting for Summer's Return
“Eventually, I developed my own image of teh "befriending" impulse behind my depression. Imagine that from early in my life, a friendly figure, standing a block away, was trying to get my attention by shouting my name, wanting to teach me some hard but healing truths about myself. But I-- fearful of what I might hear or arrogantly trying to live wihtout help or simply too busy with my ideas and ego and ethics to bother-- ignored teh shouts and walked away.
So this figure, still with friendly intent, came closer and shouted more loudly, but AI kept walking. Ever closer it came, close enough to tap me on the shoulder, but I walked on. Frustrated by my unresponsiveness, the figure threw stones at my back, then struck me with a stick, still wanting simply to get my attention. But despite teh pain, I kept walking away.
Over teh years, teh befriending intent of this figure never disapppeared but became obscured by the frustration cuased by my refusal to turn around. Since shouts and taps, stones and sticks had failed to do the trick, there was only one thing left: drop the nuclear bomb called depression on me, not with the intent to kill but as a last-ditch effort to get me to turn and ask the simple question, "What do you want?" When I was finally able to make the turn-- and start to absorb and act on the self-knowledge that then became available to me-- I began to get well.
The figure calling to me all those years was, I believe, what Thomas Merton calls "true self." This is not the ego self that wants to inflate us (or deflate us, another from of self-distortion), not the intellectual self that wants to hover above the mess of life in clear but ungrounded ideas, not the ethical self that wants to live by some abstract moral code. It is the self-planted in us by the God who made us in God's own image-- the self that wants nothing more, or less, than for us to be who we were created to be.
True self is true friend. One ignores or rejects such friendship only at one's peril.”
― Parker J. Palmer, quote from Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation
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