“Spoons are excellent. Sort of like forks, only not as stabby.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“If the same object from two different times touches itself, one of two things will happen. Either the Universe will cease to exist. Or three remarkable dwarfs will dance through the streets with flowerpots on their heads.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“You have your milk,” he said. “Where there is milk, there is hope.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“No milk," I said.
"No milk," said my sister.
I watched my dad think about this. He looked like he was going to suggest that we have something for breakfast that you do not need milk for, like sausages, but then he looked like he remembered that, without milk, he couldn't have his tea. He had his "no tea" face.
"You poor children," he said. "I will walk down to the shop on the corner. I will get milk.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“The globby aliens went a very pale green. The pirates, shiny-black-hair-men, and the piranhas looked at them puzzled, seeking some kind of explanation, as did the wumpires.
"If two things that are the same thing touch," proclaimed the volcano god, "then the whole Universe shall end. Thus sayeth the great and unutterable Splod."
"How does a volcano know so much about transtemporal meta-science?" asked one of the pale green aliens.
"Being a geological formation gives you a lot of time to think," said Splod. "Also, I subscribe to a number of learned journals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Are there any ponies in this?" asked my sister. "I thought there would be ponies by now.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“I think that there should have been some nice wumpires," said my sister, wistfully. "Nice, handsome, misunderstood wumpires."
"There were not," said my father.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“But it’s not later yet,” said Professor Steg. “It’s still now. It won’t be later until later.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Being a geological formation gives you a lot of time to think. Also, I subscribed to a number of learned journals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“How Do You Feel This Morning When You Know What You Did Last Night?”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“I opened the door. “Don’t do that,” said a green, globby person. “You’ll let the space-time continuum in.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“All the dinosaurs have gone off into the stars, leaving the world to mammals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“My hands shook, but the milk did not touch the milk, and the Universe did not end.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“And then they all sang a song called "I've Got a Loverly Bunch of Hard-hairy-wet-white-crunchers," which was an ancient dinosaur song that had apparently been written by Professor Steg's Aunt Button.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“The person in the balloon basket said "I hope you don't mind me helping, but it looked like you were having problems down there."
I said, "You're a Stegosaurus.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Then [the dinosaurs] sang me a song called, "Don't Go Down to the Tar Pits, Dear, Because I'm Getting Stuck on You.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Dinosaurs are reptiles, sir," said Professor Steg. "We do not go in for milk.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
Neil Gaiman
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“Remembering a man's stories makes him immortal.”
― Daniel Wallace, quote from Big Fish
“I looked up to find a slim blond figure standing in the doorway to the kitchen. For a frozen second, I looked at him and he looked at me, and then I screamed and threw my coffee, which hit him square in the groin.”
― Karen Chance, quote from Hunt the Moon
“As far as she could see, the nuns must be full of impure thoughts or else they wouldn’t be so sure everyone else had them.”
― Nora Roberts, quote from Public Secrets
“I’ve been a bit worried about my maleness lately, somewhere along the line I seem to have picked up too many female hormones.”
― Sue Townsend, quote from True Confessions of Adrian Albert Mole
“The untutored egotist merely wants what he wants. Give him a religious education, and it becomes obvious to him, it becomes axiomatic, that what he wants is what God wants, that his cause is the cause of whatever he may happen to regard as the True Church and that any compromise is a metaphysical Munich, an appeasement of Radical Evil.”
― Aldous Huxley, quote from The Devils of Loudun
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