“Spoons are excellent. Sort of like forks, only not as stabby.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“If the same object from two different times touches itself, one of two things will happen. Either the Universe will cease to exist. Or three remarkable dwarfs will dance through the streets with flowerpots on their heads.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“You have your milk,” he said. “Where there is milk, there is hope.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“No milk," I said.
"No milk," said my sister.
I watched my dad think about this. He looked like he was going to suggest that we have something for breakfast that you do not need milk for, like sausages, but then he looked like he remembered that, without milk, he couldn't have his tea. He had his "no tea" face.
"You poor children," he said. "I will walk down to the shop on the corner. I will get milk.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“The globby aliens went a very pale green. The pirates, shiny-black-hair-men, and the piranhas looked at them puzzled, seeking some kind of explanation, as did the wumpires.
"If two things that are the same thing touch," proclaimed the volcano god, "then the whole Universe shall end. Thus sayeth the great and unutterable Splod."
"How does a volcano know so much about transtemporal meta-science?" asked one of the pale green aliens.
"Being a geological formation gives you a lot of time to think," said Splod. "Also, I subscribe to a number of learned journals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Are there any ponies in this?" asked my sister. "I thought there would be ponies by now.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“I think that there should have been some nice wumpires," said my sister, wistfully. "Nice, handsome, misunderstood wumpires."
"There were not," said my father.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“But it’s not later yet,” said Professor Steg. “It’s still now. It won’t be later until later.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Being a geological formation gives you a lot of time to think. Also, I subscribed to a number of learned journals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“How Do You Feel This Morning When You Know What You Did Last Night?”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“I opened the door. “Don’t do that,” said a green, globby person. “You’ll let the space-time continuum in.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“All the dinosaurs have gone off into the stars, leaving the world to mammals.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“My hands shook, but the milk did not touch the milk, and the Universe did not end.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“And then they all sang a song called "I've Got a Loverly Bunch of Hard-hairy-wet-white-crunchers," which was an ancient dinosaur song that had apparently been written by Professor Steg's Aunt Button.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“The person in the balloon basket said "I hope you don't mind me helping, but it looked like you were having problems down there."
I said, "You're a Stegosaurus.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Then [the dinosaurs] sang me a song called, "Don't Go Down to the Tar Pits, Dear, Because I'm Getting Stuck on You.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
“Dinosaurs are reptiles, sir," said Professor Steg. "We do not go in for milk.”
― Neil Gaiman, quote from Fortunately, the Milk
Neil Gaiman
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“He was halfway to the house, thinking to set the cabbage inside the kitchen door,when a brown blur thundered past him.
Joanna Robbins tore out of the barn astride a magnificent chestnut quarter horse. She leaned forward in the saddle,hat flopping against her back, hair streaming out behind her in a wild curly mass as she urged her mount to a full-out gallop. Unable to do anything but stare, Crockett stood dumbstruck as she raced past.
She was the most amazing horsewoman he'd ever seen. Joanna Robbins. The shy creature who claimed painting and reading were her favorite pastimes had just bolted across the yard like a seasoned jockey atop Thoroughbred. She might have inherited her mother's grace and manners, but the woman rode like her outlaw father.Maybe better.”
― Karen Witemeyer, quote from Stealing the Preacher
“Back in the kitchen, Mummy was trying to make her [knitted] hippo stand up on the table. I had to swallow a gasp of horror -- its head was the same size as its body, none of its limbs were equal in length, and it appeared to have a fin. She didn't seem perturbed and carried on trying to make it stand with a childlike patience.
Because of its grotesquely misshapen head, it looked as if it was trying to do some kind of yoga headstand.
"That hippo's got five legs," observed Allegra from the window seat. "Unless you've made it very anatomically correct? In which case it's positively disturbing.”
― Hester Browne, quote from Little Lady, Big Apple
“In the same way that the stewards on the Titanic were more concerned about the unemptied ashtrays on the bar than the enormous hole in the side of the ship which was letting in zillions of gallons of water, I too was worrying about the unimportant and ignoring the vital. Sometimes it's easier that way. Because although there was little I could do about the huge hole, it was within my power to empty an asthray.”
― Marian Keyes, quote from Watermelon
“Peace and war start within one’s own home. If we really want peace for the world, let us start by loving one another within our families. Sometimes it is hard for us to smile at one another.”
― Mother Teresa, quote from No Greater Love
“I'm not trying to bleed you. I want to renew you.”
― W.P. Kinsella, quote from Shoeless Joe
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