“Culture Clash
Dylan says
when I meet his mother today
I shouldn't mention
that I'm Jewish.
I say
okay, but can I
tell her about
the HIV postive thing?
He gives me a look.
I give him one back”
“We've turned off all the lights
in the living room
to make hand shadows.
We've got this
big flashlight
aimed at the wall.
I make the silhouette of my hand
into a duck.
Robin makes his into a rabbit.
Now my duck kisses his rabbit
And-POOF!- it turns into
a turkey.
And for some reason
this strikes us
as hysterically funny.
But you probably had to be there.”
“I wish he hadn't gone and cut his hair.
He looks about eight years old.
His ears have tripled in size.
Everyone's started calling him Dumbo.
Which wouldn't be so bad,
except they've started calling me
Mrs. Dumbo.
You can't even tell
he's got curly hair anymore.
There's nothing left
to run my fingers through.
Just this weird
blond AstroTurf
sprouting out of his skull.”
“I love that sign," I say.
"I love you," Robin says.
I feel my cheeks
turn the color of the sky.
"I love you, too," I say.”
“what my mother doesnt know wont hurt her”
“Grace says, "Are you thirsty?
I could go get the hose..."
I say, "Thanks. But I'd rather have
a swig of some Miracle-Gro.”
“Every now and then,
during the commercials
Dad will say something like,
'How was school today, Sophie Dophie?'
Once I said, 'We played strip poker
during third period and I lost.'
Dad just said, 'That's nice,'
without even looking up from his meatloaf.”
“If Dylan and I had met
by chatting on the Net
in a room of cyberspace
instead of face to face
and I hadn't seen his lips
or the way he moves his hips
when he does that sexy dance
and I hadn't had a chance
to look into his eyes
and be dazzled by their size
and all that I had seen
were his letters on my screen,
then I might as well confess:
I think I would have liked him
less.”
“I prefer to thin of it as rebooting my ovarian operating system.”
“Don't think you can get rid of me that easily. As long as I'm around, you'll never be alone. I do have my reputation
to uphold as your, uh, very, close friend, you know. Heck, I'm going to be around so much, you'll probably be begging me to leave.”
“I refused to look back. I wasn’t dumb enough to turn around and peek over my shoulder. I was the type who yelled at the girls in scary movies who did so.”
“No one is worth wasting a gorgeous weekend over.”
“Fear is a fire to temper courage and resolve. Use it so.”
“I think you inhaled too much lead from those scantron sheets”
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