Quotes from The Third Wheel

Jeff Kinney ·  224 pages

Rating: (54.4K votes)


“He got the crib, so for the first few months of my life I had to sleep in the top dresser drawer, which I'm pretty sure isn't even legal.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“I don't know what a guy needs to do to impress a girl these days.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“Back in those days it was just me swimming around in the dark, doing back flips and taking naps whenever I want.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania
澳洲毕业证澳洲学历文凭原版制作Q/微981497266办理UTAS毕业证塔斯马尼亚大学毕业证成绩单真实学历学位认证University of Tasmania”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“I started worrying that maybe you only get a certain number of prayers answered in you lifetime and I'm burning through mine too fast. I'd hate to find out later on that I used up all my chits, because I've been acting like I've got an unlimited supply.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel



“I probably should've thought about talking to Uncle Gary a lot earlier. He's been married something like four times already, so he's an EXPERT on relationships.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“Seriously, though, in this day and age I don't know why we're still cutting open frogs to see what's inside them.
If somebody tells me there's a heart and intestines inside a grog, I'm willing to take their word for it.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


“Seriously, though, in this day and age I don't know why we're still cutting open frogs to see what's inside them.
If somebody tells me there's a heart and intestines inside a frog, I'm willing to take their word for it.”
― Jeff Kinney, quote from The Third Wheel


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About the author

Jeff Kinney
Born place: in Andrews Air Force Base, Maryland, The United States
Born date February 19, 2018
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Popular quotes

“The moon is always jealous of the heat of the day, just as the sun always longs for something dark and deep.

They could see how love might control you, from your head to your toes, not to mention every single part of you in between.

A woman could want a man so much she might vomit in the kitchen sink or cry so fiercly blood would form in the corners of her eyes.

She put her hand to her throat as though someone were strangling her, but really she was choking on all that love she thought she’d needed so badly.

What had she thought, that love was a toy, something easy and sweet, just to play with? Real love was dangerous, it got you from inside and held on tight, and if you didn’t let go fast enough you might be willing to do anything for it’s sake.

She refused to believe in superstition, she wouldn’t; yet it was claiming her.

Some fates are guaranteed, no matter who tries to intervene.

After all I’ve done for you is lodged somewhere in her brain, and far worse, it’s in her heart as well.

She was bad luck, ill-fated and unfortunate as the plague.

She is not worth his devotion. She wishes he would evaporate into thin air. Maybe then she wouldn’t have this feeling deep inside, a feeling she can deny all she wants, but that won’t stop it from being desire.

Love is worth the sum of itself and nothing more.

But that’s what happens when you’re a liar, especially when you’re telling the worst of these lies to yourself.

He has stumbled into love, and now he’s stuck there. He’s fairly used to not getting what he wants, and he’s dealt with it, yet he can’t help but wonder if that’s only because he didn’t want anything so badly.

It’s music, it’s a sound that is absurdly beautiful in his mouth, but she won’t pay attention. She knows from the time she spent on the back stairs of the aunts’ house that most things men say are lies. Don’t listen, she tells herself. None if it’s true and none of it matters, because he’s whispering that he’s been looking for her forever. She can’t believe it. She can’t listen to anything he tells her and she certainly can’t think, because if she did she might just think she’d better stop.

What good would it do her to get involved with someone like him? She’d have to feel so much, and she’s not that kind.

The greatest portion of grief is the one you dish out for yourself.

She preferred cats to human beings and turned down every offer from the men who fell in love with her.

They told her how sticks and stones could break bones, but taunting and name-calling were only for fools.

— & now here she is, all used up.

Although she’d never believe it, those lines in *’s face are the most beautiful part about her. They reveal what she’s gone through and what she’s survived and who exactly she is, deep inside.

She’s gotten back some of what she’s lost. Attraction, she now understands, is a state of mind.

If there’s one thing * is now certain of, it’s house you can amaze yourself by the things you’re willing to do.

You really don’t know? That heart-attack thing you’ve been having? It’s love, that’s what it feels like.

She knows now that when you don’t lose yourself in the bargain, you find you have double the love you started with, and that’s one recipe that can’t be tampered with.

Always throw spilled salt over your left shoulder. Keep rosemary by your garden gate. Add pepper to your mashed potatoes. Plant roses and lavender, for luck. Fall in love whenever you can.”
― Alice Hoffman, quote from Practical Magic


“Her mother had once told her that there were men who kept secrets bottled up inside and that it spelled trouble for the women who loved them. Denise instinctively knew the truth of her mother’s statement, yet it was hard to reconcile her words with the love she felt for Taylor McAden.”
― Nicholas Sparks, quote from The Rescue


“So I am about to be a free man again, to wander where I please.
I find the prospect nauseating.
I think that tonight I will hand Howard W, Campbell, Jr., for crimes against himself.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, quote from Mother Night


“She set the course of his life with just a smile.”
― Christopher Moore, quote from A Dirty Job


“I have to find a way of making myself happy, I have to stop looking for happiness elsewhere. It’s true,”
― Paula Hawkins, quote from The Girl on the Train


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