Royals

...all that matters is the truth as you know it, and as the ones who love you know it.

He just showed up like a posh vampire I accidentally invited in, then couldn't make leave.

One of my favorite things about Scotland so far is that the unicorn is their national animal. You really can’t hate a country where that’s the case.

Are you saying I’m better than a sword to the eye?” I ask, and he chuckles. The sound is warm and soft, and I swear I can feel it, dancing over the knobs of my spine. Oh my god, this rain needs to end soon. “Maybe not better, but certainly not worse,

So I’m not going to be able to get up on the fence and sing ‘Yankee Doodle Dandy’ while waving six American flags and twirling a baton?

I met a queen once,” Dad muses. “She tried to put her hand down my trousers.” Dad looks over at me and raises his eyebrows. “Surely this can’t go any worse than that.

You're looking a bit bolshy. [...] Like a Bolshevik, [...] Someone about to start a revolution.

For a boy I’d once thought was made mostly of tweed, Miles can kiss.

little moment of understanding that feels weirdly nice, given that it comes from a guy who I’m not entirely convinced isn’t a tea cozy cursed by a witch to live as a real-life boy.

Dad goes back inside, and I smile as I watch him go. I’ve missed having my parents around, which is a sentiment that might get me kicked out of teendom, but it’s the truth. No matter how embarrassing my dad might be, how distracted my mom always is, they love us. They’re easy to be around, and they’ve only ever wanted us to be healthy and happy. In that way, we’re a lot luckier than the royals.

I need a list of every den of iniquity in the city of Edinburgh,” I blurt out.

Scotland so far is that the unicorn is their national animal.

Miles stares at me for a moment before blinking owlishly. “I . . . don’t have a list like that?” He thinks for a second, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck.

kerfuffle will make things easier on her?