Quotes from Misbehaving

Abbi Glines ·  352 pages

Rating: (20.1K votes)


“If guys don't open doors for you, then they aren't worth your time.”
― Abbi Glines, quote from Misbehaving


“As the music played over the speakers and the waterfall in the pool filled the silence around us, I knew that, without a doubt, I had just been ruined.”
― Abbi Glines, quote from Misbehaving


“I smashed all the windows in my ex-boyfriend’s truck.” “You did what?” I couldn’t have heard her correctly. That did not happen in real life. Country songs, yes. Real life, no way.”
― Abbi Glines, quote from Misbehaving


“I could tell she was one of those ridiculously gorgeous southern blondes. It was like the South had some special ingredient to raise them like that down here.”
― Abbi Glines, quote from Misbehaving


“Jason Stone is your Logan. He’s wealthy and impressive and handsome. He’s a fairy tale. But don’t get serious. Guard your heart.” I let out a frustrated sigh and dropped my arms. “Why are you calling him my Logan?” I asked. “Gilmore Girls, sweetheart. Gilmore Girls. If you had bothered to watch it with me like I asked you several times, you would know what I mean. Hank is your Dean. He wasn’t meant for you either. He was just the first heartbreak you keep going back to. Now you’ve met your Logan. It’s a shame, though. I wish you’d met your Jess next.”
― Abbi Glines, quote from Misbehaving



About the author

Abbi Glines
Born place: in Birmingham, Alabama
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“After that, we don’t talk, instead we get hammered. Shot after shot we down, chasing each one with a Little Debbie snack. Before we know it, we’re hanging on to the bar counter floating around in a sugar and alcohol coma, just the way I like it.

“There’s my girl,” Racer shouts as he topples off his stool and onto the floor, laughing hysterically. Georgie stops in her tracks and looks over at Emma, who’s standing next to her, both holding two boxes of Little Debbie snacks each.

“Emmmmmmmma,” Tucker drags out, waving his glass in the air. “You brought the snacks.”

“Oh, Jesus,” Emma mutters as she approaches us.

I point to my mouth and say, “Feed me. Daddy needs sugar.”

Racer is beside me, tangled in the pegs of his bar stool, still laughing. “Did you bring Oatmeal Pies, George? Please tell me you have the pies.”

“Uh, I think you’ve had enough for tonight,” she says, looking down at her boyfriend.

“Never!” Racer struggles to get up and finally knocks the chair over to free himself. “Fucking bitch chair, digging into me with its claws.” Talking to the stool directly he says, “I’m taken, warm someone else’s ass.”

“He’s going to propose, chair, leave him alone,” Tucker announces, causing me to cringe.

“Dude, don’t say it out loud.” I punch Tucker in the shoulder. “Georgie is right there.” All three of us turn to Georgie, who’s shaking her head in humor. Hopefully.

“I’ll take Aaron,” Emma tells Georgie. “Seems like Racer is more of a handful.”

“Hell yeah, I am.” Racer stumbles while cupping his crotch. “A giant handful.”

Georgie rolls her eyes. “And that’s our cue to leave.”

“But we didn’t eat our snacks.”

“Seems like you had enough.” Georgie grabs Racer by the hand. “Come on.”

As they walk away, Racer asks, “Want to have sex in the car?”

“Not even a little.”

“Here, you two, you can have your boxes of snacks.” Emma hands Tucker and me both a box of Oatmeal Pies that we clutch to our chests.

“You’re the best,” I admit.

“She is, isn’t she?” Tucker says. “I love her so fucking hard. Best wife ever.”

She pulls on both of our hands to get us moving. “She wins wife of the year award,” I announce. “Best wife goes to Emma. Can we get a round of applause?”

Tucker breaks open his Oatmeal Pies and starts spraying them like confetti. “Emma. Emma. Emma.” He chants, getting the three other patrons in the bar to join in.

I pump my fist as well, forgetting everything from earlier. I knew I could count on my guys.

“Emma. Emma. Emma . . .”

And then, everything fades to black. Emotions and feelings are non-existent as I pass out, just the way I like it. Just the way I need it.”
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