“That was the moment when he grasped that nobody wanted to use their minds. People wanted peace. They wanted to eat and sleep and have other people be nice to them. What they didn't want to do was think.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Whenever things were frightening, it was a good idea to measure them.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Inzwischen geht es ihm besser, manche Tage seien schon fieberfrei, auch die Träume, in denen er Baron Humboldt erwürge, zerhacke, erschieße, anzünde, vergifte oder unter Steinen begrabe, würden seltener.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Man hat uns früh eingeredet, dass ein Leben Publikum benötigt.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Ich habe herausgefunden, dass der Mensch bereit ist, Unbill zu erfahren, aber viel Erkenntnis entgeht ihm, weil er den Schmerz fürchtet.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Insa, cand au trecut de primele suburbii ale Berlinului si Humboldt si-a inchipuit cum Gauss a cercetat corpurile ceresti prin telescopul sau in tot acest timp - corpuri ceresti ale caror orbite pot fi descrise in formule simple -, n-a mai fost in stare sa spuna care dintre ei doi a ramas acasa si care a colindat lumea.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Den Hunde, sagte Bonpland, habe er nie leiden können.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Links, sagte Humboldt.
Wieso links, fragte Bonpland.
Also rechts, sagte Humboldt.
Aber warum rechts?
Zum Teufel, rief Humboldt, jetzt werde es ihm zu blöd.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Seltsam sei es und ungerecht, sagte Gauß, so recht ein Beispiel für die erbärmliche Zufälligkeit der Existenz, dass man in einer bestimmten Zeit geboren und ihr verhaftet sei, ob man wolle oder nicht. Es verschaffe einem einen unziemlichen Vorteil vor der Vergangenheit und mache einen zum Clown der Zukunft. [...] Sogar ein Verstand wie der seine, sagte Gauß, hätte in frühen Menschheitsaltern oder an den Ufern des Orinoko nichts zu leisten vermocht, wohingegen jeder Dummkopf in zweihundert Jahren sich über ihn lustig machen und absurden Unsinn über seine Person erfinden könne.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Gauß kam auf den Zufall zu sprechen, den Feind allen Wissens, den er immer habe besiegen wollen. Aus der Nähe betrachtet, sehe man hinter jedem Ereignis die unendliche Feinheit des Kausalgewebes. Trete man weit genug zurück, offenbarten sich die großen Muster. Freiheit und Zufall seien eine Frage der mittleren Entfernung, eine Sache des Abstands...”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Aici nu există mai devreme sau mai târziu... aici există doar muncă, asta facem aici.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Seltsam sei es und ungerecht, sagte Gauß, so recht ein Beispiel für die erbärmliche Zufälligkeit der Existenz, dass man in einer bestimmten Zeit geboren und ihr verhaftet sei, ob man wolle oder nicht. Es verschaffe einem einen unziemlichen Vorteil vor der Vergangenheit und mache einen zum Clown der Zukunft.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Žena je imala tanane, prilično izvijene obrve. Haljina joj je otkrivala leđa i Gaus se pitao kako bi bilo pritisnuti usne na njih.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
“Man hat uns früh eingeschärft, dass ein Leben Publikum benötigt.”
― Daniel Kehlmann, quote from Measuring the World
Daniel Kehlmann
Born place: in Munich, Germany
Born date January 13, 1975
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“Vai de inima care n-a iubit în tinerețe!”
― Ivan Turgenev, quote from Home of the Gentry
“It was quite unlike their friendly discourse of some days before, and presently Stephen grew sadly bored: lies or half-lies, he reflected, had a certain value in that they gave a picture of what the man would wish to seem; but a very few were enough for that. And then they had a striving, aggressive quality, as though the listener had to be bludgeoned into admiration; they were the antithesis of conversation.”
― Patrick O'Brian, quote from The Mauritius Command
“It was 1976.
It was one of the darkest days of my life when that nurse, Mrs. Shimmer, pulled out a maxi pad that measured the width and depth of a mattress and showed us how to use it. It had a belt with it that looked like a slingshot that possessed the jaw-dropping potential to pop a man's head like a gourd. As she stretched the belt between the fingers of her two hands, Mrs. Shimmer told us becoming a woman was a magical and beautiful experience.
I remember thinking to myself, You're damn right it had better be magic, because that's what it's going to take to get me to wear something like that, Tinkerbell! It looked like a saddle. Weighed as much as one, too. Some girls even cried.
I didn't.
I raised my hand.
"Mrs. Shimmer," I asked the cautiously, "so what kind of security napkins do boys wear when their flower pollinates? Does it have a belt, too?"
The room got quiet except for a bubbling round of giggles.
"You haven't been paying attention, have you?" Mrs. Shimmer accused sharply. "Boys have stamens, and stamens do not require sanitary napkins. They require self control, but you'll learn that soon enough."
I was certainly hoping my naughty bits (what Mrs. Shimmer explained to us was like the pistil of a flower) didn't get out of control, because I had no idea what to do if they did.”
― Laurie Notaro, quote from The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life
“I would not say no to a tortoise, I said.”
― Jessica Grant, quote from Come, Thou Tortoise
“I got up the next morning with morphine hangover. I poured myself a large glass of cold milk, which is an antidote for morphine.”
― William S. Burroughs, quote from And the Hippos Were Boiled in Their Tanks
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