Quotes from Lovely Vicious

“I would love to slap you right now, but I’m currently wielding a nine pound ball and I’m afraid that would be called murder.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Come! Come sit by me. It’s a nice bench. Nice and lovely on the butt.”
“You’re drunk.”
“Yeah, and you’re ugly, but do I complain about it? No! Because I don’t complain about things that I can’t change. That’s called intelligence.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“How did you find me? If you hacked into the Club’s computer to look up my appointments - "
“Whoa, I think you overestimate me, shitlord. Last time I checked all I did was be in the wrong place at the right time. I saw you and had to - ”
“Stalk me.”
“ - delicately approach you. In a sideways manner. From behind. Without being seen at all. For ten minutes.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I cannot, for the life of me, remember what we were just conversing about! Alas. I will forever remember this time we spent together affectionately and oh god I remember now you pervert!”
“You were the one who shouted ‘sex’!” He hisses.
“You were the one who was born, so really I think that’s the root of the problem.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Did you have fun? How many boys did you make out with?” She asks. “Seventy. At least.” “How many shots did you take?” “Fourteen. I let go of the wheel halfway home and Jesus drove me the rest of the way.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“The waitress scuttles away, and I make a shooing motion at the old couple who’re still glaring.

“Don’t you have something to better to work on?” I hiss. “Like golfing or eating prunes or dying?”

The old lady looks shocked.

“Okay, sorry, not dying. But seriously, prunes are good for you.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Sometimes, we can’t do the things we want to do for ourselves. Sometimes we wait for someone else to do them. You can’t always wait like that. You have to seek out change on your own.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“And then he came, and pulled her petals off one by one, forcing her to surround herself with thorns to survive. But he missed one petal. And she guards it with a tiger's ferocity.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Hello, spawn!” I coo at Kayla’s baby brother as he waddles into her room. He burps at me.
“It looks like you guys speak the same language,” Kayla quips.
“Where was that sass when Jack was making you cry at Avery’s party?”
“Uh, hello? He’s my crush? I’m not going to sass him.”
“Flash ‘em the sass before you flash ‘em the ass.”
“What kind of saying is that?” She laughs.
“Grandma-saying. She’s the head of the motorcycle gang at her nursing home.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Let's go. We have to confront her."

I scoff. "Confront her? That's a little mild, don't you think? I'm going to rip her tits off.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I’m gross. Look at me – getting all sloppy in front of my mortal enemy. Unexecutable. Inexhaustible. Un…un…under the sea.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Hairy monkeyballs!” I hiss. “Dogshit on a stick! Puke pancakes!”
A head pokes in. Wren, green eyes smiling, walks over to my bed.
“I knew you were awake. Who else spews such original and captivating swears?”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I will pull your pancreas out through your nose and feed it back to you in a drip inserted into your anus is that clear?”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I’m all about that shit.”
Mom shoots me the Disapproving-Mom-Subtle-Lip-Frown.
“I’m all about that poop,” I correct delicately.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“She was probably a trusting, naïve girl before him, like a daisy. And then he came, and pulled her petals off one by one, forcing her to surround herself with thorns to survive.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“And offers me a black rose.
"I figured you'd hate flowers, so I decided to get one that matched your soul" He says. I take the flower, careful not to touch any of his long finger.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“You’re seventeen! Why do I have to keep reminding you of that? There are soooo many women you haven’t even met yet! Don’t act like you’re tired of the puss-puss, no guy is ever tired of the puss-puss.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Yes, my style sucks. But at least I didn't bowl half a game with a nacho stuck to my ass.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“And he uses big words, so he's probably a huge nerd. To be fair, I do too, but that's because I'm fabulous. Jack has no such excuse.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Is it? Because that picture of me was taken by my old school's yearbook club, and they put it in the section titled 'STUDENT FAILSAUCES! XD.

What's an XD?

A sideways laughing face of horrendous proportions. Don't change the subject.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Did you have fun? How many boys did you make out with?

Seventy. At least.

How many shots did you take?

Fourteen. I let go of the wheel halfway home and Jesus drove me the rest of the way.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I leave her to chemically combust and find Wren in the student council office, filling out extremely interesting paperwork. He’s buried behind piles of the stuff. I can barely see tufts of his blonde hair poking out. I reach into the paperwork pile and shove the two halves aside. Hundreds of them fall off the desk and to the floor. Papers drift through the air like snowflakes. Fat, boring-ass snowflakes. Wren looks up, face slack with shock.
“Whatcha doing?” I ask.
“Dividing up funding for the other clubs,” He whispers, clearly distraught. A paper plops onto his head and slides off dejectedly. I’m respectful for three seconds.
“So anyway, I had this nightmare in which Jack was sexy and Kayla died.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Hey, prez!” I get out of the desk and hug him. He makes a strangled-cat noise and adjusts his
glasses so hard they fly off his face. I pick them off the floor.
“You okay?”
“I-I’m fine. Um. You look – you look, uh, you look - ”
“Nice?” I offer.
“Really…really nice,” Wren exhales.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“you, Mr. Bernard,”. “Last time I checked they don’t pay you to ogle teenage girls. They pay
you to teach. So start teaching.”
Mr. Bernard jumps in his chair, clears his throat, and hurriedly goes to the whiteboard and starts writing equations. I salute Jack as I bow out the door.
“Have a great day, Jackoff.”
“Try not to get molested, cow,” He snaps.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“She smells like lavender and sadness – and that smells like ripped tissue paper and sun-dried salt.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I will be the silent protector Gotham Kayla needs”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Oh, horseshit! I-I mean, darn!” She corrects herself quickly. Why don’t you come in and have some tea. Do you like tea? Or are you a coffee person? I can make coffee, just be warned it tastes like ass and looks like ass – I mean,butt.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I don’t cry and the don’t-cry times are somehow worse than the crying ones.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“I wake up i Satan's butthole.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

“Thinking and talking about love leads to Love, which is the enemy. Do not consort with the enemy. Even if those hot-ass actors in the movies make it look cuddly and nice and tempting, don’t fall for it. It’s the biggest bad in the world, the worst villain ever created by hormone-pumped pubescent morons. It’s the Joker, Lex Luthor, that one overweight guy who’s always messing with the Scooby-Doo gang. It’s the final boss in the massive joke of a video game you call your life.”
― Sara Wolf, quote from Lovely Vicious

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Popular quotes

“Don’t look down,’ Perabo warned them when they almost reached the top and the view from the archways became imposing.

Froi sensed Perabo was instructing himself more than the others.

‘You obviously haven’t been imprisoned on the roof of a castle in the Citavita, Perabo,’ Lirah said.

‘Or hung upside down over a balconette staring down into the gravina, waiting to die,’ Gargarin added.

‘Nothing worse than being chained to the balconette with your head facing down over that abyss,’ Arjuro joined in, not one to be outdone in the misery stakes.

‘Try balancing on a piece of granite between the godshouse and the palace with nothing beneath you but air,’ Froi said.

Perabo stopped and took a deep breath and looked as if he was going to be sick.

‘Don’t look down, Perabo,’ Froi advised.”
― Melina Marchetta, quote from Quintana of Charyn

“The first sentence of the truth is always the hardest. Each of us had a first sentence, and most of us found the strength to say it out loud to someone who deserved to hear it. What we hoped, and what we found, was that the second sentence of the truth is always easier than the first, and the third sentence is even easier than that. Suddenly you are speaking the truth in paragraphs, in pages. The fear, the nervousness, is still there, but it is joined by a new confidence. All along, you've used the first sentence as a lock. But now you find that it's the key.”
― David Levithan, quote from Two Boys Kissing

“We English have perfect eyesight."
Alec finally turned to look at her. "Are you jesting with me, wife?"
"You decide, husband."
"Aye, you are," Alec answered. "I've already learned all about the English sense of humor."
"And what have you learned?"
"You don't have any.”
― Julie Garwood, quote from The Bride

“It was one of those hugs when it feels almost like you’re trying to meld yourself into the other person. Sometimes it’s sexual, but sometimes it’s because the world has gone too wrong and you need something to cling to.”
― Laurell K. Hamilton, quote from The Harlequin

“She was willing to give you everything she had. And you took it from her. You took her youth, and her beauty, and her energy and her health-" For a moment, think of his mother, Gabe couldn't continue speaking. He fell silent and choked back tears. Then he took a deep breath and went on, "- and it didn't matter. We found each other. None of it mattered but that. You won't ever know what that's like, to love someone. In a way, I pity you. But I hope you starve.”
― Lois Lowry, quote from Son

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