“There is a stark difference between fear and uncertainty, Sarai. You fear nothing but are uncertain of everything.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“You made me feel real emotions. You unlocked me.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I don’t want to sleep alone,” she says gently.
And I don’t force her to. Sarai falls fast asleep curled up next to me in my bed. Right where I want her.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“Victor Faust did much more than help me escape a life of abuse and servitude. He changed me.
He changed the landscape of my dreams, the dreams I had every day about living ordinarily and free
and on my own. He changed the colors on the palette from primary to rainbow—as dark as the colors
of that rainbow may be.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“She looks defeated. Beautiful and soft and damaged standing there before me partially clothed in the light of the moon beaming through the tall window. Beautiful, but defeated. That look in her eyes, it somehow latches onto my soul and all I want is for her to turn and walk away. Because I know that if she doesn't, if she presses me further with those soft lips and sad, vulnerable eyes that I'll succumb to the moment and either fuck her or kill her.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“This goes against everything that I am, Sarai," he says and then kisses me. "No, it doesn't," I whisper and kiss him back. "It's you becoming more of who you really are.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I am not your hero. I am not the other half of your soul who could never let anything bad ever happen to you. -trust your instincs first always, and me, if you choose, last.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“Beautiful but defeated and damaged. Damaged for the rest of her life and no amount of emotional mutilation will ever fully give her back her innocence. The girl is a ticking time bomb, a danger to herself and very possibly to others. I wasn’t sure before, but now I know that she is more unstable than I ever could have imagined. And because she is so skilled at hiding it, not only from me but also from herself, she is more dangerous than I am.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“Despite my growing fear, I still want to be right where I am, trapped in the merciless arms of a killer.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I will do everything in my power to keep you safe, but it’s not a guarantee because no matter how much you trust me, you should never, under any circumstances trust anyone fully. In the end, you can only trust yourself. I am not your hero. I am not the other half of your soul who could never let anything bad ever happen to you. Trust your instincts first always, and me, if you choose, last”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I’m definitely not some kind of reformed badass created by my extraordinary experiences, either. Just ask the spider that crawled on me the other night while I was reading a book in bed. Mrs. Gregory about had a heart attack I screamed so loud.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“And when I get mad, I always cry. It’s how I’ve been for as long as I can remember. And I hate it.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I am discipline. Sarai is rage.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I want her to look upon me, just for a moment. But she never does and I walk away. Sarai I feel like I should be like Cordelia, sitting next to me wide awake yet unaware of it herself.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“Isso vai contra tudo o que eu sou, Sarai." Ele diz e, em seguida, beija-me. "Não, não vai." Eu sussurro e beijo de volta. "É você tornando-se mais quem você realmente é.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“I turn toward the window beside me because unlike Victor, I have absolutely no control over the smile on my face, and I can’t risk letting him see it. ~~~~”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
“You kept your cool. You waited for your opportunity. You pretended to the point of acceptance and trust. You’re risking your life right now to go back for that girl. You are innocent, And it’s why you’re still alive.”
― J.A. Redmerski, quote from Killing Sarai
J.A. Redmerski
Born place: in The United States
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“One reason that Americans as a people became nostalgic about the fifties more than twenty-five years later was not so much that life was better in the fifties (though in some ways it was), but because at the time it had been portrayed so idyllically on television.”
― David Halberstam, quote from The Fifties
“The individual parts played by other instrumentalists-- crickets or earthworms, for instance-- may not have the sound of music by themselves, but we hear them out of context. If we could listen to them all at once, fully orchestrated, in their immense ensemble, we might become aware of the counterpoint, the balance of tones and timbres and harmonics, the sonorities. The recorded songs of the humpback whale, filled with tensions and resolutions, ambiguities and allusions, incomplete, can be listened to as a a part of music, like an isolated section of an orchestra. If we had better hearing, we could discern the descants of sea birds, the rhythmic tympani of schools of mollusks, or even the distant harmonies of midges hanging over meadows in the sun, the combined sound might lift us off our feet.”
― Lewis Thomas, quote from The Lives of a Cell: Notes of a Biology Watcher
“Thinking ‘economistically’, as we have done now for thirty years, is not intrinsic to humans.”
― Tony Judt, quote from Ill Fares the Land
“Christ did not die to forgive sinners who go on treasuring anything above seeing and savoring God. And people who would be happy in heaven if Christ were not there, will not be there. The gospel is not a way to get people to heaven; it is a way to get people to God. It's a way of overcoming every obstacle to everlasting joy in God. If we don't want God above all things, we have not been converted by the gospel.”
― John Piper, quote from God Is the Gospel: Meditations on God's Love as the Gift of Himself
“Ayşe has always admired the Ottoman talent for euphemism. The Auspicious Event was the massacre and execution of ten thousand Janissaries. Bodies had been heaped in the Hippodrome, rotting in the June heat. The more perfumed the language, the more brutal the repression.”
― Ian McDonald, quote from The Dervish House
Sullivan's Island
Vagabond
White Wolf
In Dubious Battle
Kill the Dead
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