Molly Harper · 371 pages
Rating: (15.6K votes)
“Well, that cinched it. He was an asshole. I was definitely going to end up sleeping with him.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“If God didn't want us to eat the animals, He wouldn't have made them so tasty.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“He's like that with everybody. Don't take it personally. Some people were just born with a pinecone shoved up their butts.
In Cooper's case, it's lodged sideways.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“There's an inverse relationship between my temper and my ability to control my accent. If you hear me say 'Fiddledeedee', run for the hills, because I'm getting ready to take out bystanders.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“What do you want from me, Maggie? Advice? Absolution? Go forth and be a bitch no more.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“You will treat my underwear with the reverence it deserves. Next time, you will stop and appreciate--hell, you'll marvel at the miracle of my ass clad in silk.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Maybe it was just an over abundance of hormones, a response to a sexual starvation diet. I'd been without for so long that my body was craving the worst possible thing for me. Cooper was carnal triple chocolate cheesecake, deep-fried on a stick.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Well, pardon me for not knowing about the thermal-only panty rule,” I said, smirking as he dipped his head to nuzzle one of the silky bra cups. “I’ll rush right out and buy some long johns.”
Pausing to look up with perfect sincerity, he promised, “If you do, I will weep. Like a little girl. In public.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“It was not healthy for one man's smile to make my panties spontaneously combust”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“When a naked man shows up on your doorstep with a bear trap clamped around his ankle, it's best just to do what he asks”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Instead of celebrating with a cake (too full of poisonous refined sugars) and presents (too materialistic), my mother would come into my room at exactly 3:57 A.M. to tell me the story of my miraculous emergence into this world, as if it was some fairy tale. Although I supposed few fairy tales involved the words 'vaginal flowering'.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Establishing dominance early in the relationship is key. Vampire children are like human children in that they can sense weakness. They will wait for you to be busy or too distracted to realize that you’ve given them permission to feed on the pizza guy.
—Siring for the Stupid: A Beginner’s Guide to Raising Newborn Vampires”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Why couldn’t I have spent the last few months like this, wrapped in his arms, drinking in the warm, spicy scent of him? Oh, wait. Cooper was a complete dick to me, that’s why.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I loved lingerie. I loved the feel of satin and silk on my skin. I loved the juxtaposition of wearing a pair of two-hundred-dollar lace panties under blue jeans, like the pair I was wearing at the moment. Lingerie was a personal statement that you didn't have to declare to the world. You could be as demure or as naughty as you wanted to be, and no one ever had to know unless you showed them... or were injured in a serious car accident.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Hi Maggie, it's nice to see you again,' he said, smiling so sweetly I thought I might need insulin.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I tend to bake when I'm upset. Or bored...or premenstrual...or if it's Tuesday. I'll use any excuse.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“A boot up the ass could be considered a 'nudge' right?”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I sighed. 'Ah spite, the stuff of fairy tales.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“THE BLUE GLACIER SALOON was part general store, part restaurant, part bar. It was my fantasy come true, a Stuckey’s that served shots.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“He delivered the mail, ran our modest recycling program, and maintained our handful of public buildings. He also occasionally fell asleep while driving a snowplough, but he was such a cheerful guy it was hard to stay pissed at him. Besides every village needs an idiot.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“My mother had spent one hundred dollars on shipping to send me cookies, antimeat propaganda, and laxatives.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Cooper! Help!'
The coward turned and walked into the kitchen as if he hadn't seen me getting frogmarched by the estrogen squad.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“The rest of the morning would consist of checking on a pothole in the parking lot of the village clinic and writing up a schedule for the community centre that might finally settle the ongoing feud between the local quilting group and the bridge club.
It was good to be queen.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
Molly Harper
Born place: The United States
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“My word is law on this island. She is the woman I love. So shall her words also be law upon The Shade… unless I say otherwise.”
― Bella Forrest, quote from A Shade of Blood
“Oh, if you’re looking for your friends, they’re in that hallway over there,” Jess said as she pointed. “I’m not sure I’d interrupt them right now though.” “Why’s that?” Kylie feared she’d been right and maybe they were beating one another to a pulp. Jessie leaned closer, lowering her voice to a mere whisper. “They’re kinda making out at the moment.”
― Nicole Edwards, quote from Travis
“I'm not one of those cool, creative kids in my art class who make skirts out of trash bags and paint in crazy colours.”
― Jenn Bennett, quote from The Anatomical Shape of a Heart
“We raise our children, especially girls, to ignore their spontaneious reactions-we teach them not to rock the societal boat...By the time she is thirty, the valient little girl's "Ick!"-her tendency to respond, to rock the boat, when someone's actions are really mean, may have been exciese from her behavior, and perhaps from her very mind.”
― Martha Stout, quote from The Sociopath Next Door
“For Paley, a watch is purposeful and thus must have been created by a being with a purpose. A watch needs a watchmaker, just as a world needs a world-maker—God. Yet both Wallace and Paley might have heeded the lesson from Voltaire's Candide (1759), in which Dr. Pangloss, a professor of "metaphysico-theology-cosmolonigology," through reason, logic, and analogy "proved" that this is the best of all possible worlds: '"Tis demonstrated that things cannot be otherwise; for, since everything is made for an end, everything is necessarily for the best end. Observe that noses were made to wear spectacles; and so we have spectacles. Legs were visibly instituted to be breeched, and we have breeches" (1985, p. 238). The absurdity of this argument was intended on the part of the author, for Voltaire firmly rejected the Panglossian paradigm that all is best in the best of all possible worlds. Nature is not perfectly designed, nor is this the best of all possible worlds. It is simply the world we have, quirky, contingent, and flawed as it may be.”
― Michael Shermer, quote from Why People Believe Weird Things: Pseudoscience, Superstition, and Other Confusions of Our Time
Tell No One
Fragile Eternity
Soulless
The Forest of Hands...
Think and Grow Rich:...
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