Molly Harper · 371 pages
Rating: (15.6K votes)
“Well, that cinched it. He was an asshole. I was definitely going to end up sleeping with him.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“If God didn't want us to eat the animals, He wouldn't have made them so tasty.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“He's like that with everybody. Don't take it personally. Some people were just born with a pinecone shoved up their butts.
In Cooper's case, it's lodged sideways.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“There's an inverse relationship between my temper and my ability to control my accent. If you hear me say 'Fiddledeedee', run for the hills, because I'm getting ready to take out bystanders.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“What do you want from me, Maggie? Advice? Absolution? Go forth and be a bitch no more.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“You will treat my underwear with the reverence it deserves. Next time, you will stop and appreciate--hell, you'll marvel at the miracle of my ass clad in silk.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Maybe it was just an over abundance of hormones, a response to a sexual starvation diet. I'd been without for so long that my body was craving the worst possible thing for me. Cooper was carnal triple chocolate cheesecake, deep-fried on a stick.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Well, pardon me for not knowing about the thermal-only panty rule,” I said, smirking as he dipped his head to nuzzle one of the silky bra cups. “I’ll rush right out and buy some long johns.”
Pausing to look up with perfect sincerity, he promised, “If you do, I will weep. Like a little girl. In public.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“It was not healthy for one man's smile to make my panties spontaneously combust”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“When a naked man shows up on your doorstep with a bear trap clamped around his ankle, it's best just to do what he asks”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Instead of celebrating with a cake (too full of poisonous refined sugars) and presents (too materialistic), my mother would come into my room at exactly 3:57 A.M. to tell me the story of my miraculous emergence into this world, as if it was some fairy tale. Although I supposed few fairy tales involved the words 'vaginal flowering'.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Establishing dominance early in the relationship is key. Vampire children are like human children in that they can sense weakness. They will wait for you to be busy or too distracted to realize that you’ve given them permission to feed on the pizza guy.
—Siring for the Stupid: A Beginner’s Guide to Raising Newborn Vampires”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Why couldn’t I have spent the last few months like this, wrapped in his arms, drinking in the warm, spicy scent of him? Oh, wait. Cooper was a complete dick to me, that’s why.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I loved lingerie. I loved the feel of satin and silk on my skin. I loved the juxtaposition of wearing a pair of two-hundred-dollar lace panties under blue jeans, like the pair I was wearing at the moment. Lingerie was a personal statement that you didn't have to declare to the world. You could be as demure or as naughty as you wanted to be, and no one ever had to know unless you showed them... or were injured in a serious car accident.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Hi Maggie, it's nice to see you again,' he said, smiling so sweetly I thought I might need insulin.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I tend to bake when I'm upset. Or bored...or premenstrual...or if it's Tuesday. I'll use any excuse.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“A boot up the ass could be considered a 'nudge' right?”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“I sighed. 'Ah spite, the stuff of fairy tales.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“THE BLUE GLACIER SALOON was part general store, part restaurant, part bar. It was my fantasy come true, a Stuckey’s that served shots.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“He delivered the mail, ran our modest recycling program, and maintained our handful of public buildings. He also occasionally fell asleep while driving a snowplough, but he was such a cheerful guy it was hard to stay pissed at him. Besides every village needs an idiot.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“My mother had spent one hundred dollars on shipping to send me cookies, antimeat propaganda, and laxatives.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Cooper! Help!'
The coward turned and walked into the kitchen as if he hadn't seen me getting frogmarched by the estrogen squad.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“The rest of the morning would consist of checking on a pothole in the parking lot of the village clinic and writing up a schedule for the community centre that might finally settle the ongoing feud between the local quilting group and the bridge club.
It was good to be queen.”
― Molly Harper, quote from How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf
“Sonea era más cínica. Había observado que las mujeres solían pasar por alto cuando estaban enamoradas porque, en algún momento, el amor tendía a desvanecerse. Era mejor casarse con un hombre que te gustara y en quien confiaras”
― Trudi Canavan, quote from The Magicians' Guild
“I'm gonna fight for you, until your heart stops beating.”
― Stephenie Meyer, quote from Eclipse
“The war on foodborne pathogens deserves the sort of national attention and resources that has been devoted to the war on drugs. Far more Americans are severely harmed every year by food poisoning than by illegal drug use. And the harms caused by food poisoning are usually inadvertent and unanticipated. People who smoke crack know the potential dangers; most people who eat hamburgers don’t. Eating in the United States should no longer be a form of high-risk behavior.”
― Eric Schlosser, quote from Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal
“As he passed me, he leaned to Curran and handed him a paper fan folded from some sort of flyer.
Curran looked at the fan. “What?”
"An emergency precaution, Your Majesty. In case the lady faints.”
Curran just stared at him.
Raphael strode toward the Pit, turned, flexed a bit, and winked at me.
"Give me that,” I told Curran. “I need to fan myself.”
"No, you don’t.”
― Ilona Andrews, quote from Magic Strikes
“Now, what's the difference between an invisible, incorporeal, floating dragon who spits heatless fire and no dragon at all? If there's no way to disprove my contention, no conceivable experiment that would count against it, what does it mean to say that my dragon exists? Your inability to invalidate my hypothesis is not at all the same thing as proving it true. Claims that cannot be tested, assertions immune to disproof are veridically worthless, whatever value they may have in inspiring us or in exciting our sense of wonder. What I'm asking you to do comes down to believing, in the absence of evidence, on my say-so.”
― Carl Sagan, quote from The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark
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