Double Fudge

hi I hope u want to be my friends

He even brags about his poops,

I wanted them," Fudge whined. "I know you did. But we can't buy everything you want." [Mom told him] "Why" "We don't have the money to buy..." I could tell Mom was having a hard time explaining this. She thought for a minute before she finished. "...just for the sake of buying. Money doesn't grow on trees." "I know it doesn't grow on trees," Fudge said. "You get it at the ATM." "You can't just go to the ATM whenever you want money," Mom told him. "Yes you can," Fudge said. "You put in your card and money comes out. It works every time." "No. You have to deposit money into your account first," Mom said. "You work hard and try to save part of your salary every week. The cash machine is just a way to get some of your money out your account. It doesn't spit out money because you want it. It's not that easy." "I know, Mom," Fudge said. "Sometimes you have to stand on line." Mom sighed and looked at me. "Got any ideas Peter?

cut you in half then I’d have a half-brother!

That’s right! And I’m going to tell him exactly how I got these stains on my

There’s a lot of stuff you know and you don’t even know how you know it!

choose too fast just to be done with it? I do that sometimes. I can’t help myself. I hate to shop. But are these shoes really that bad? Bad enough so the kids at school will laugh and say, “Nice shoes, Hatcher. Where’d you find them . . . in the trash?” Should I try on another pair? Should I wait to see what Fudge chooses and then . . . Wait a minute, I told myself. I can’t believe I’m thinking this way, as if my five-year-old brother knows more about cool than me. Since when is he the expert on cool? Since when is he the expert on anything? “Make