Christopher Healy · 436 pages
Rating: (9.3K votes)
“No, Princes Charming," Duncan cheerfully corrected. "'Prince' is the noun; that's what gets pluralized. 'Charming' is an adjective; you can't add an S to it like that.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“I'm Liam of Erinthia. I'm here to rescue you ... And You are not Cinderella. You are a tree branch wrapped in a sheet”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Duncan, what are you?"
"Human!" Duncan cried, trembling with excitement.
"More specific," Liam said, still dramatically.
"A five-foot-two human!"
"I'm going for hero here," Liam hinted under his breath.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Can you believe the man rhymed 'Rumplestiltskin' with 'crumpled napkins'?”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Duncan,we're still in prison," Frederic said dryly. "You're not going to see anything except this cell. Which has spiders, by the way. Have you noticed the spiders?" "Indeed I have: Carmen, Zippy, and Dr. T," Duncan said.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“On still another road, a green-haired man wobbled by on peppermint-stick stilts; a fiery-plumed bird of paradise perched on his shoulder. But he's not in this story, so don't pay any attention to him.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“He was curious to know more about her. So he did something extremely rare. He sent her a note. Even more shocking, he suggested they meet. In person. Two people from different kingdoms - who are engaged to be married. Crazy, I know.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Once you've been squashed by a giant, a troll doesn't even seem nearly as heavy.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Frederic had imagined this moment - him running to Ella with open arms, calling her name - but being as winded as he was, doubled over with his hands on his knees, all he could do was nod in her general direction.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Get him now?" Duncan asked. He looked at the sword in his hand. Unsure of what he should do, he tossed the weapon at the giant. The sword flipped through the air a couple of times and landed softly on the grass only a few feet away.
"That was the most pathetic thing I've ever seen," said Gustav.
Duncan stepped forward to retrieve his sword, tripped over his belt, hit his head on a rock, and knocked himself out cold.
"I spoke to soon," said Gustav. "That was the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Please tell me he's not skipping.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Someone's having a pity party and didn't invite the rest of us.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Wild card, got it," Duncan said. "Just like in Crazy Eights. I can be a diamond; I can be a spade. Whatever you need me to be, I'm that thing. That is so me.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Look,” Liam said, “sometimes being a hero isn’t about getting the glory. It’s about doing what needs to be done.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“You're a way-getter-inner, I can tell.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Look, sometimes being a hero isn't about getting the glory. It's about doing what needs to be done" -Liam”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“(during which Gustav was so overwhelmed by emotion that he actually gave Frederic a pat on the back),”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“He opened the door and entered the Stumpy Boarhound. Which you knew he would do. Because you read the prologue.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“that,” Liam said, “it’ll be a lot to live up to.” Frederic smiled. “So let’s live up to it.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Oh, by the way, you’re going to have to turn over some of your land to the trolls.”)”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Hey! Someone in the crowd is carrying a ‘Duncan the Daring’ sign!” Duncan shouted. “Oh, it’s Frank,” he added, less enthusiastically.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Gustav,” he said, “I’m proud of you. You can relax now.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
“Вообще-то, им выдалась такая неделька, что после нее вполне законно ввязаться в массовую драку.”
― Christopher Healy, quote from The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
Christopher Healy
Born place: The United States
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“El conocimiento siempre da más conocimiento, del mismo modo que el dinero da más interés.”
― Arthur Conan Doyle, quote from The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Vol 2
“Kingsley, ever the joker, had his Venator mark tattooed near his unmentionables”
― Melissa de la Cruz, quote from Gates of Paradise
“And neither do you, ciratile. you EVER try this shit again with me and mine, and i will rape and plunder the village ,and burn the motherfucker to the ground..." He looked around at the bodies on the floor. "And as you've seen here today there ain't nothing you bitches can do to stop me. Talk is cheap. Pain is free. And I'm peddling the shit out of it. so you come on and get some.”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, quote from Born of Silence
“So let’s make sure we’re clear on this: Obviously the people that managed to get to the roof knew their lives were in danger. They had the presence of mind to climb to a safe haven and even to arm themselves as best they could. So far so good, but then one of the group decided that they might need some beverages to stave off thirst, still good. That person, fearing for his life, went to the beer section, which again is admirable, everyone knows beer is the nectar of the gods. But then he grabs Keystone Light? Are you kidding me? I’d rather eat the can than drink the contents.”
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