Helen Argiro · 255 pages
Rating: (87 votes)
“No wonder there are so many people with eating disorders.It’s like this diet plan is being administered by the Gestapo.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“To a woman, being married means you do not under any circumstances put your penis in another woman’s vagina. It also means no blowjobs, no oral, no anal, no phone sex, no sex of any kind, ever, with anyone other than your wife for as long as you’re married. As soon as you say ‘I do’, it means that where other women are concern ‘I don’t’ is the only correct response. If you play by these rules, you’re safe. If you don’t, we leave. It’s really that simple.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“When a guy says he's a 'simple man', what he's really telling you is he's cheap.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“In the suburbs lust thrives and flourishes like an epidemic of lawn grubs during a heat wave.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“Having sex with your neighbour is not a good idea. Not under any circumstances, nothing good will come of it. It’s a cliché. It’s a soap opera. It’s a bad made for TV movie.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“It’s really hard to be turned on by a man who shows up for a date in corduroy pants and big white walking shoes that look as though he’s shoved his feet inside of two giant pillows.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“And so it was on the second Thursday of September, these five men kissed their spouses and children good-bye and climbed aboard the rented RV for a fun filled weekend of golfing, drinking, taking drugs and having sex with women who were not their wives.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
“When a guy says he’s ‘a simple man’ what he’s really telling you is he’s cheap," Madeline said.”
― Helen Argiro, quote from Tales of Sex & Suburban Lunacy
Helen Argiro
Born place: Toronto, Canada
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“My heart and the elevator, a plummet inside a plummet.”
― Jonathan Lethem, quote from As She Climbed Across the Table
“But now . . . he was not yet at the age, like his father, when life shifts to past tense, when what is becomes what was and all the other verbs defining your existence go slumping into the preterite, crusted with apophonic alternations (I sing calcifying into I sang), and you can do nothing but marvel or wince at the irredeemable, irreversible arc of it—not yet. On this November night he was fifty-four years old. By no means, he told himself, was he beyond the future tense. But he could feel the past tense gaining on him, like the cold seeping into his back and dusting his face. He licked it off his lips and stood up. He had work to do.”
― Jonathan Miles, quote from Want Not
“She tucks my hair behind my ear. Now I know where her son gets it. “Thank you,” she sniffs, struggling to hold herself together. “Thank you for coming into our lives, for loving us the way you do, and for making my son and the rest of us incredibly happy.”
― J.L. Drake, quote from Mended
“The fact is, few Westerners can come close to understanding the complexities of the Middle East and its people.”
― Mosab Hassan Yousef, quote from Son of Hamas
“There seems to be an attitude problem, as if we cannot shake ourselves out of a mindset of limited achievement.”
― A.P.J. Abdul Kalam, quote from Ignited Minds
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