Quotes from Promise You Won't Tell?

John Locke ·  252 pages

Rating: (6.7K votes)


“I’m confident with the possible exception of Texas, it’s illegal to use your employees for target practice.”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“He’s six-three, and so skinny my mom would say there’s more meat on a butcher’s apron.”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“Maybe so. But it helps our success rate.” “You’ve got proof in that file?” “Yes.” “May I see it?”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“On the first day of school, a first-grade teacher tells her class they’re not babies anymore. They have to use grown up words. Then she asks the kids what they did that summer. The first kid says, ‘I got a bad boo boo.” Teacher says, ‘No. You suffered an injury. Use grown up words.’ Second kid says, ‘I rode on a choo choo.’ Teacher says, ‘No. You rode on a train. Use grown up words.’ Third kid says, ‘I read a book.’ Teacher says, ‘Good for you! Which book did you read?’ The kid says, ‘Uh…Winnie the Shit!”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“When you see a duck in a pond, the part you see is peaceful, quiet, and serene. But under the surface, his legs are kicking away, churning water. That’s me.”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?



“Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, there’s no pushing it back in.”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“You’re young.” “I’m twenty-four.” “As I said,” she sniffs. “Being young has its advantages, Jana.” “Such as?” “I’ve got boundless energy!” “That’s it?” “I’m enthusiastic.” “Same thing.” “I’ve got perky breasts.” She glances at my chest and sniffs again, unimpressed. Then says,”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“don’t want to get him fired. He might follow me home and burst my skull like a ripe melon.” “Dillon almost never does that to new clients. You can speak freely.” “He was eating from a box of cereal when I pulled up.” “Dillon likes his sugar.” “His hands were sticky. I made him wash before touching my car keys.”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


“Always a good idea,” I say. We’re quiet a minute. Finally she says, “How much do you charge?” “A thousand”
― John Locke, quote from Promise You Won't Tell?


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Popular quotes

“Tom felt that it was time to wake up; this sort of life might be romantic enough, in his blighted condition, but it was getting to have too little sentiment and too much distracting variety about it. So he thought over various plans for relief, and finally hit pon that of professing to be fond of Pain-killer. He asked for it so often that he became a nuisance, and his aunt ended by telling him to help himself and quit bothering her. If it had been Sid, she would have had no misgivings to alloy her delight; but since it was Tom, she watched the bottle clandestinely. She found that the medicine did really diminish, but it did not occur to her that the boy was mending the health of a crack in the sitting-room floor with it.

One day Tom was in the act of dosing the crack when his aunt's yellow cat came along, purring, eying the teaspoon avariciously, and begging for a taste. Tom said:

"Don't ask for it unless you want it, Peter."

But Peter signified that he did want it.

"You better make sure."

Peter was sure.

"Now you've asked for it, and I'll give it to you, because there ain't anything mean about me; but if you find you don't like it, you mustn't blame anybody but your own self."

Peter was agreeable. So Tom pried his mouth open and poured down the Pain-killer. Peter sprang a couple of yards in the air, and then delivered a war-whoop and set off round and round the room, banging against furniture, upsetting flower-pots, and making general havoc. Next he rose on his hind feet and pranced around, in a frenzy of enjoyment, with his head over his shoulder and his voice proclaiming his unappeasable happiness. Then he went tearing around the house again spreading chaos and destruction in his path. Aunt Polly entered in time to see him throw a few double summersets, deliver a final mighty hurrah, and sail through the open window, carrying the rest of the flower-pots with him. The old lady stood petrified with astonishment, peering over her glasses; Tom lay on the floor expiring with laughter.”
― Mark Twain, quote from The Adventures of Tom Sawyer


“One always has exaggerated ideas about what one doesn't know.”
― Albert Camus, quote from The Stranger


“Will you pour out tea, Miss Brent?' The el­der wom­an replied: 'No, you do it, dear. That tea-​pot is so heavy. And I have lost two skeins of my grey knitting-​wool. So an­noy­ing.' Ve­ra moved to the tea-​ta­ble. There was a cheer­ful rat­tle and clink of chi­na. Nor­mal­ity returned. Tea! Blessed or­di­nary everyday af­ter­noon tea! Philip Lom­bard made a cheery re­mark. Blore re­spond­ed. Dr. Arm­strong told a hu­mor­ous sto­ry. Mr. Jus­tice War­grave, who or­di­nar­ily hat­ed tea, sipped ap­prov­ing­ly.

In­to this re­laxed at­mo­sphere came Rogers. And Rogers was up­set. He said ner­vous­ly and at ran­dom: 'Ex­cuse me, sir, but does any one know what's become of the bath­room cur­tain?'

Lom­bard's head went up with a jerk. 'The bath­room cur­tain? What the dev­il do you mean, Rogers?'

'It's gone, sir, clean van­ished. I was go­ing round draw­ing all the cur­tai­ns and the one in the lav -​ bath­room wasn't there any longer.'

Mr. Jus­tice War­grave asked: 'Was it there this morn­ing?'

'Oh, yes, sir.'

Blore said: 'What kind of a cur­tain was it?'

'Scar­let oil­silk, sir. It went with the scar­let tiles.'

Lom­bard said: 'And it's gone?'

'Gone, Sir.'

They stared at each oth­er.

Blore said heav­ily: 'Well - af­ter all-​what of it? It's mad - ​but so's everything else. Any­way, it doesn't matter. You can't kill any­body with an oil­silk cur­tain. For­get about it.'

Rogers said: 'Yes, sir, thank you, sir.' He went out, shut­ting the door.”
― Agatha Christie, quote from And Then There Were None


“Margarita was never short of money. She could buy whatever she liked. Her husband had plenty of interesting friends. Margarita never had to cook. Margarita knew nothing of the horrors of living in a shared flat. In short... was she happy? Not for a moment.”
― Mikhail Bulgakov, quote from The Master and Margarita


“EATABLE MARSHMALLOW PILLOWS

LICKABLE WALLPAPER FOR NURSERIES

HOT ICE CREAMS FOR COLD DAYS

COWS THAT GIVE CHOCOLATE MILK

FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS

SQUARE SWEETS THAT LOOK ROUND”
― Roald Dahl, quote from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory


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