Here's Looking at You

London was one of the worst places to have a bad day and one of the best places to have a good day

Single Anna was whole Anna. Not finding someone wasn’t a failure, it was just a fact.

We’re scared of all sorts of things that won’t kill us, aren’t we? The things we live our lives around avoiding. Then we realise when we get to the end that what we should’ve been afraid of was a life lived by avoiding things.

but Daniel had genuine charm and authentic eccentricity. It was partly his appearance: a sweep of thick sandy hair, a bushy beard and high-magnification glasses which gave him cartoon eyes. He looked like a Looney Tunes lion crossed with an Open University professor. He dressed like Toad of Toad Hall in vintage tweed suits and spoke with an arch, old-fashioned cadence, like a junior Alan Bennett.

Anna periodically whipped the curtain back to reveal the results and deliver her verdict. Electric-blue lace mini: ‘Inside Soap Awards, winner of “Best Bitch”.’ Cabbage-rose floral with lavender sash: ‘An Alice band away from The 40-Year-Old Virgin.’ Sugar-mouse pink tulip skirt, with silver embellishment: ‘I have Sylvanian Families on my windowsill and kiss the McDigger Mole family good night individually.

Anna caught the overland, then the District Line, grabbing a seat. She kept her take-out coffee from slopping out of the tracheotomy hole in the lid with practised steadiness, like someone holding the Olympic torch aloft.

Oh, come on, I’ve said sorry for that,’ James said. ‘And I followed her back on Twitter.’ ‘What greater gesture exists? The three wise men brought gold, incense, myrrh and said unto Baby Jesus, we are Team Follow Back.

expression like he was licking piss off a nettle.

find a way to hold on to and enjoy a quiet moment, in the middle of a melee.

Key messages! Like it was an ad campaign. Buy Zantium!

Feeling nauseous, deathly cold and yet in control, he measured each minute she remained upstairs as an eternity.

Comically far from the truth. She’d rather felch Hitler’s corpse, and she betted he would