Crazy Little Thing

Apparently while I was reading The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Dating, he’d read The Guide to Dating a Complete Idiot.

Being surrounded by the people you loved is what made life... well, life.

Panty Melter: an exceedingly rare species of man blessed with so many desirable attributes he effortlessly gains access into a girl's panties.

Glasgow? Isn’t that in Sweden?” Dody was asking. He shook his head. “Scotland.” “Oh, yes, Scotland. Why, you must know Sean Connery then? He’s Scottish. Or is he German?” Des bit back a smile. “He is Scottish, but no, I never had the pleasure.” “Really? That’s surprising. Sweden is such a small country.” “Scotland.” “What? Oh, yes. Scotland. Why did you move from there, dear? Was it because of the potatoes?” She patted his hand sympathetically. “The potatoes?” “Potato famine was in Ireland, Mom,” Jasper said, banging the oven door shut. “In the 1840s,” I added, wanting to show off a little of my vast wealth of useless, esoteric facts.

Without the despair of today we can’t experience the joy of tomorrow.

Hating him had not come upon me all at once. It was gradual, creeping over me slowly, insidiously, like frostbite, until eventually I was frozen solid.

You’ll find the balance you need as soon as you let go of how you think things should be and accept them as they are.

That’s called style, girlfriend. It’s what sets us apart from the animals. And the rednecks.

Ours was the kind of dinner conversation one might expect to find in an English-as-a-second-language course or in the babble of a Pentecostal church.

The conversation blended into a sort of anecdotal jambalaya, with bits of our history woven in with pop culture trivia.

Hello?” I tried to sound skinny.

Talking to the sperm-donor-formerly-known-as-my-husband was just the garlic frosting I needed on this total piece of shit day.

Love is a grave mental disease.” “Shakespeare?” Kyle shook his head. “Plato.

popcorn, with Jordan fast on her heels. They sprinted into the dense growth of the overburdened flower beds and began running zigzag patterns around the sculptures. “Be careful in that mess of weeds!” I

It’s just practical. People die every day, so none of us should waste one little minute. I, for one, am going to kick up my heels while I’ve got some kick left.

you can’t fight against the universal balance. Without the despair of today we can’t experience the joy of tomorrow.

He put me in charge of chopping vegetables. I considered cutting my finger so he’d have to hold my hand to examine it, but that seemed a little drastic. Maybe I could be captivating without resorting to self-mutilation.

Life is to be embraced. It’s meant to be lived and enjoyed. Make your mistakes, but make them with gusto and learn from them. Some people will still let you down, like Richard. He’s the type with an itch that can’t be scratched. But I promise, if you start looking for the best in people, you’ll be very surprised at what you find.

Life is to be embraced. It’s meant to be lived and enjoyed. Make your mistakes, but make them with gusto and learn from them.

I felt like that kite. Hanging on by a slender thread, with no certainty or control over which direction life would turn me next.

know), and the definition of words like reticule and pusillanimous. “My dad was in the military,” Des said, beginning to go with the flow of Dody’s random questioning.

We can’t control events in our life, Sadie. Sometimes we can’t even control our reactions. But the harder we fight against the waves, the more exhausted we become. Control is an illusion, you know.

Oh, no reason,” I said. “Where’s Jordan?” “He’s downstairs watching Fontaine do Yoda.” “What?” Please tell me she meant something else.

You have much more than you realize. You’ll find the balance you need as soon as you let go of how you think things should be and accept them as they are. Watch for the big wave. It’ll push you in the direction of joy. You will be happy,