Flow My Tears, the Policeman Said

To live is to be haunted.

Grief causes you to leave yourself. You step outside your narrow little pelt. And you can’t feel grief unless you’ve had love before it - grief is the final outcome of love, because it’s love lost. […] It’s the cycle of love completed: to love, to lose, to feel grief, to leave, and then to love again. Grief is the awareness that you will have to be alone, and there is nothing beyond that because being alone is the ultimate final destiny of each individual living creature. That’s what death is, the great loneliness.

Fear can make you do more wrong than hate or jealousy. If you’re afraid you don’t commit yourself to life completely; fear makes you always, always hold something back. You shouldn’t be alone. It’s killing you; it’s undermining you. All the time, every day, you should be somewhere with people.

Why is love so good...? You love someone and they leave. They come home one day and you say "What's happening?" and they say, "I got a better offer someplace else," and there they go, out of your life forever, and after that until you're dead you're carrying around this huge hunk of love with no one to give it to. And if you do find someone to give it to, the same thing happens all over.

Why does a man cry? he wondered. Not like a woman; not for that. Not for sentiment. A man cries over the loss of something, something alive. A man can cry over a sick animal that he knows won't make it. The death of a child: a man can cry for that. But not because things are sad. A man, he thought, cries not for the future or the past but for the present.

Because her general taste appalled him, it annoyed him that he himself constituted one of her favorites. It was an anomaly which he had never been able to take apart.

Whatever you fear will happen to you, booze will make it happen.

Love isn't just wanting another person the way you want to own an object you see in a store. That's just desire. You want to have it around, take it home and set it up somewhere in the apartment like a lamp.

No rational response was possible. Her irrationality made it so. The terrible power, he thought, of illogic.

Ruth said, "Love isn't just wanting another person the way you want to own an object you see in a store. That's just desire. You want to have it around, take it home and set it up somewhere in the apartment like a lamp. Love is"-she paused, reflecting-"like a father saving his children from a burning house, getting them out and denying himself. When you love you cease to live for yourself; you live for another person.

Nobody named Cheerful Charley is tuned in on my wavelength

He felt the pressure of her love as she squeezed his fingers, and then there was nothing. Except the pain. But nothing else, no Heather, no hospital, no staff men, no light. And no sound. It was an eternal moment and it absorbed him completely.

Ruth said, "Love isn't just wanting another person the way you want to own an object you see in a store. That's just desire. You want to have it around, take it home and set it up somewhere in the apartment like a lamp. Love is"-she paused, reflecting-"like a father saving his children from a burning house, getting them out and dying himself. When you love you cease to live for yourself; you live for another person.

Fear,” Jason said, “can make you do more wrong than hate or jealousy. If you’re afraid you don’t commit yourself to life completely; fear makes you always, always hold something back.

She sighed. "Oh, God, to be in the flyship cruising through the void. That's what I long for: an infinite void. With no human voices, no human smells, no human jaws masticating plastic chewing gum in nine iridescent colors.

This kind of neighborhood did not please him; he had seen it a million times, duplicated throughout the face of the earth. It had been from such as this that he had fled, early in his life, to use his sixness as a method of getting out. And now he had come back. He did not object to the people: he saw them as trapped here, the ordinaries, who through no fault of their own had to remain. They had not invented it; they did not like it; they endured it, as he had not had to. In fact, he felt guilty, seeing their grim faces, their turned-down mouths. Jagged, unhappy mouths.

Grief causes you to leave yourself. You step outside your narrow little pelt. And you can’t feel grief unless you’ve had love before it – grief is the final outcome of love, because it’s love lost. You do understand; I know you do. But you just don’t want to think about it. It’s the cycle of love completed: to love, to lose, to feel grief, to leave, and then to love again. Jason, grief is awareness that you will have to be alone, and there is nothing beyond that because being alone is the ultimate final destiny of each individual living creature. That’s what death is, the great loneliness.

You never see the ones who really love you and help you; you're always involved with strangers.

Am I being paid back for something I did? he asked himself. Something I don't know about or remember? But nobody pays back, he reflected. I learned that a long time ago: you're not paid back for the bad you do nor the good you do. It all comes out uneven at the end. Haven't I learned that by now, if I've learned anything?

You shouldn't be frightened so easily. Or life is going to be too much for you.

But look at the aspirations of that rabbit and look at his failing. A little life trying. And all the time it was hopeless. But the rabbit didn't know that. Or maybe did know and kept trying anyhow. But I think he didn't understand. He just wanted to do it so badly. It was his whole life, because he loved the cats.

Spegnetevi, vane luci, più non brillate! Non v'è notte nera a sufficienza per chi, In preda alla disperazione, piange la persa fortuna. La luce altro non fa che svelare la vergogna.

Certa gente perde una creatura amata e tira dritto e sposta il proprio affetto su un'altra. Ma è doloroso. Troppo doloroso. L'amore supera l'istinto. Quando ami smetti di vivere per te stesso. Vivi per un'altra persona. La sofferenza è l'emozione più forte che un uomo o un bambino o un animale possano provare. E' una buona sensazione. La sofferenza ti spinge a lasciare te stesso. Esci dal tuo piccolo e limitato guscio. E non puoi soffrire se prima non hai amato. La sofferenza è l'esito finale dell'amore, perché è amore perduto. È il completamento del ciclo dell'amore: amare, perdere, soffrire, lasciare e lasciarsi, poi amare di nuovo. Soffrire è la consapevolezza che dovrai essere solo, e al di là di questo non c'è nulla, perché essere solo è il destino ultimo, definitivo di ogni creatura vivente. Ecco cos'è la morte: la grande solitudine. La conoscenza della mancanza di coscienza. Quando moriremo non ce ne accorgeremo, perché morire è perdere tutto quanto. Ma soffrire è morire ed essere vivi allo stesso tempo. L'esperienza più assoluta, più totale che si possa provare. È troppo. Il corpo arriva quasi a distruggersi, con tutti quei sussulti, quelle contorsioni. Ma io voglio provare dolore. Versare lacrime. La sofferenza ti unisce di nuovo a ciò che hai perso. E' una fusione. Te ne vai anche tu con la cosa o la persona amata che scompare. In un certo senso, ti dividi da te stesso e l'accompagni, fai con lei una parte del viaggio. La segui sin dove ti è concesso spingerti. Ma alla fine, la sofferenza se ne a e tu torni in sintonia con il mondo. Senza l'altro. E riesci ad accettarlo. Che altra scelta abbiamo? Piangi, continui a piangere, perché non torni mai del tutto indietro dal posto in cui sei andato con l'altro. Un frammento che si è staccato dal tuo cuore pulsante è ancora là. C'è una lesione. Una ferita che non guarisce mai. E se ti succede una volta e un'altra e un'altra volta ancora, col tempo se ne va una parte troppo grande del tuo cuore e non riesci più a soffrire. E allora tu stesso sei pronto a morire. Salirai la scala in diagonale e qualcun altro resterà indietro a soffrire per te.