“You saved me, you know. Life had me running. Had me by the throat, and I really was falling under, losing hope. And then I met you, and you gave me a reason to keep my head above water. You taught me to swim. You taught me to life. And instead of giving up, I fell in love. I fell under your spell, Kylie, and ever single day since, I’ve fallen further and further under for you.”
“You and I? It may end badly. I may get hurt. But guess what? I don’t care! I’ve never had my heart broken. Maybe I’m fine with risking it, because it’s better than being afraid and going through life bored.”
“You light up the blackness that has been my life, and I don’t know how to ever be the kind of man you need and deserve, but I want to try. For you, for me, and for us.”
“Everybody knows girls like the bad boys, and I’m thoroughly bad.”
“Grab my hands and stop me, because if you don’t, you’re mine. And I’m yours, and whatever else happens, we’ll have something beautiful and perfect, and it’ll mean something, for as long as it lasts.”
“We can’t protect her from life, Nell. You know that. She’s going to get hurt someday. All we can do is love her, and be there when it happens.”
“I wish – I wish I’d at least kissed you. Just once.”
“My prerogative as your father is to break the face of anyone who fucks with you. And I will, whether you like it or not. So if our boy Oz prefers to have his face in one piece, he’ll treat you like the precious thing you are.”
“No matter how good your kid is, sometimes life has a way of bringing shit to them that no one can foresee or protect against. If that happens to Kylie, I’ll just have to be there to help her get through it.”
“That lifestyle? It’s bad, Kylie. I don’t want you anywhere near that. It’s dark, and it’s dangerous, and it can suck you under so fast. So fast.”
“If I amount to anything it’ll be as part of a band. That’s it. I’ll be playing dive bars and shitty clubs, and I’ll get high in the alleys and do lines in the bathrooms, and eventually I’ll OD and that’ll be that.” I glance ad her. “Is that the life you want?”
“You light up the blackness that has been my life, and I don’t know how to ever be the kind of man you need and deserve, but I want to try. For you, for me, and for us. For the possibility of us.”
“When you were young and asking about him, how do you tell a six-year-old that his father hung himself? And then the older you got, the more it was just easier to pretend like I was protecting you from the awfulness of the truth.”
“He wants what he cannot have, and does not want what he can't refuse — and isn't aware of it. He doesn't know the difference between his own possessions and others'. Because, if he did, he would never be thwarted of disappointed.
Or nervous.”
“But nothing changes if nothing changes. I saw that slogan on a T-shirt the other day, and it really resonated. I've changed. My horizons have shifted, And if I want to keep growing and changing, I need to challenge myself.”
“You humans certainly have your hearts set on being happy, don’t you?”
“Ernst Mayr characterized the Cartesian view of animals as dumb automatons.2”
“It is the chiefest point of happiness, she scribbled quickly, before the Commander could see, that a man is willing to be what he is."
Chapter 6 · Page 53 · Location 957”
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