Quotes from Alice, I Think

290 pages

Rating: (1.8K votes)


“In the future if my mother tries to shame me with her disapproval, I will let her know in no uncertain terms that I reject her and all of her codependent baggage. I am Codependent No More.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“Maybe careers aren’t something you can really plan for. They just sort of happen, like brown eyes or flat feet. I took one of those career aptitude tests last year, and it showed that I should be a flight attendant or a seamstress. Not a fashion designer or anything, mind you, but a sweatshop worker. Apparently stewardesses and sweatshop workers and I enjoy a lot of the same interests and activities.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“If you are alive and conscious, you are probably codependent.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I am not a people person.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I think MacGregor might be a genius. Anyone so oblivious to the horror of the human world must be.”
― quote from Alice, I Think



“If you start looking up, they start asking questions.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“Not being a big one for having friends, I had no idea what I was going to do with Aubrey, you know, to entertain him.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“Well, at least I can spare myself the ordeal of a whole battery of personality tests. My personality is poor; that much is clear.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“It’s not a good idea to let on about extreme happy feelings. People get ideas.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I may never recover. It was like an out-of-body experience. I’m an alien trying on human rituals.”
― quote from Alice, I Think



“Much as I usually dislike nice, positive people, I have to admit that Margaret isn’t bad.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I’m already in the late stages of advanced detachment where my mother is concerned. With a little practice I could feel that way about everyone.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I haven’t been that happy since I became conscious for the first time, you know, when I became aware of myself and got so uncomfortable and everything.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“I don’t care about this stuff. I’m not even sure I’m a girl. I’m an eye in the sky. I am detached. I’m an idiot.”
― quote from Alice, I Think


“It seemed a little risky, enjoying something so… fun, but I couldn’t help it.”
― quote from Alice, I Think



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“It's much easier to get over someone if you can delude yourself into thinking you never really cared that much.”
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“Hold my hand in yours, and we will not fear what hands like ours can do.”
― quote from The Epic of Gilgamesh


“When I was thirteen I spent a lot of time pretending to like dance music because everyone at my school seemed to love it. If only I'd known it was OK to have different tastes to others and that one day my mind would be blown open by an older man who would introduce me to The Smiths, The Cure, Buzzcocks, Talking Heads and almost every other band I adore to this day. I also wish I'd been reassured that one day, yes, a boy would actually fancy me in spite and potentially, deliberately, FOR my zero boob/skinny legs combo. But mainly I wish I'd listened to my mother when she said learning to play the piano might come in handy in the future and would actually be something I would thank her for forcing me to do. Every Wednesday we would drive to Mrs Batten's house listening to The ArchersI, with me in the passenger seat trying desperately to think up excuses for why I hadn't practiced that week. Though it seemed very unlikely at the time, I am thankful for those piano lessons every time I manage to impress a boy by hammering out some Chopin when drunk (swot up, kids!).”
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