The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation

Codependency is about normal behaviors taken too far. It’s about crossing lines.

When you let go of fear and the need to control, you’ll experience how mysterious, sacred, and interesting Life can be.

It’s not my place to tell him to stop drinking,” Shelly said. “But being with him or talking to him when he’s drunk is my business.” That’s the difference between boundaries and controlling. We can’t make a person stop drinking. But we can refuse to talk to or date that person. Boundaries concern our behavior—what we will or won’t do. It’s not a boundary if we can’t enforce it. Be clear. If people have room to misinterpret, they will. People hear what they want to and what causes the least pain. We won’t be clear with others if we’re not clear with ourselves. Sometimes we don’t like their behavior, but we don’t want to lose the relationship, so our boundaries are murky.

It’s not what we don’t know that hurts us,” people say. “It’s what we believe is true that isn’t that does the damage.” There

We don’t learn about taking care of ourselves the way we learn math. Although information is useful and sometimes critical, self-care isn’t only an intellectual process. It’s our experiences that change us.

Take one or two steps more. Right around the bend is when we’ll see the Light. God isn’t late. We’re early. Don’t be impatient. Instead, be present for the moment we’re in now.

Set boundaries even when you’re scared, and when it doesn’t feel comfortable to do. Eventually setting boundaries will happen naturally for you,

We can confuse love with dependency, manipulation, and neediness. None of those are love. Love is when we want other people to be who they are.