Melody Beattie · 288 pages
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“Codependency is about normal behaviors taken too far. It’s about crossing lines.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“When you let go of fear and the need to control, you’ll experience how mysterious, sacred, and interesting Life can be.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“It’s not my place to tell him to stop drinking,” Shelly said. “But being with him or talking to him when he’s drunk is my business.” That’s the difference between boundaries and controlling. We can’t make a person stop drinking. But we can refuse to talk to or date that person. Boundaries concern our behavior—what we will or won’t do. It’s not a boundary if we can’t enforce it. Be clear. If people have room to misinterpret, they will. People hear what they want to and what causes the least pain. We won’t be clear with others if we’re not clear with ourselves. Sometimes we don’t like their behavior, but we don’t want to lose the relationship, so our boundaries are murky.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“It’s not what we don’t know that hurts us,” people say. “It’s what we believe is true that isn’t that does the damage.” There”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“We don’t learn about taking care of ourselves the way we learn math. Although information is useful and sometimes critical, self-care isn’t only an intellectual process. It’s our experiences that change us.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“Take one or two steps more. Right around the bend is when we’ll see the Light. God isn’t late. We’re early. Don’t be impatient. Instead, be present for the moment we’re in now.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“Set boundaries even when you’re scared, and when it doesn’t feel comfortable to do. Eventually setting boundaries will happen naturally for you,”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“We can confuse love with dependency, manipulation, and neediness. None of those are love. Love is when we want other people to be who they are.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“Death finds his way unimpeded, be the path narrow or rocky”
― Shota Rustaveli, quote from The Knight in the Panther's Skin
“I like to know where I stand with people, and I figure I owe them the same courtesy.”
― Tamara Ireland Stone, quote from Every Last Word
“She said people on hard times deserved to have beauty in their lives as much as anyone else, whether or not they could pay their rent or were walking to a breadline. Granny said that just because someone was poor didn't mean they were poor of heart.”
― Pam Muñoz Ryan, quote from Echo
“You sound defensive. Do you think everybody is accusing you? Does your guilt demand everybody accuse you?” She looked down. “I don’t even need to see your eyes to know they’re loaded with shame.” She”
― Lucian Bane, quote from Reginald Bones: Part One
“To love is to value. Only a rationally selfish man, a man of self esteem, is capable of love - because he is the only man capable of holding firm, consistent, uncompromising, unbetrayed value. The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone”
― Ayn Rand, quote from The Virtue of Selfishness: A New Concept of Egoism
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