Melody Beattie · 288 pages
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“Codependency is about normal behaviors taken too far. It’s about crossing lines.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“When you let go of fear and the need to control, you’ll experience how mysterious, sacred, and interesting Life can be.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“It’s not my place to tell him to stop drinking,” Shelly said. “But being with him or talking to him when he’s drunk is my business.” That’s the difference between boundaries and controlling. We can’t make a person stop drinking. But we can refuse to talk to or date that person. Boundaries concern our behavior—what we will or won’t do. It’s not a boundary if we can’t enforce it. Be clear. If people have room to misinterpret, they will. People hear what they want to and what causes the least pain. We won’t be clear with others if we’re not clear with ourselves. Sometimes we don’t like their behavior, but we don’t want to lose the relationship, so our boundaries are murky.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“It’s not what we don’t know that hurts us,” people say. “It’s what we believe is true that isn’t that does the damage.” There”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“We don’t learn about taking care of ourselves the way we learn math. Although information is useful and sometimes critical, self-care isn’t only an intellectual process. It’s our experiences that change us.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“Take one or two steps more. Right around the bend is when we’ll see the Light. God isn’t late. We’re early. Don’t be impatient. Instead, be present for the moment we’re in now.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“Set boundaries even when you’re scared, and when it doesn’t feel comfortable to do. Eventually setting boundaries will happen naturally for you,”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
“We can confuse love with dependency, manipulation, and neediness. None of those are love. Love is when we want other people to be who they are.”
― Melody Beattie, quote from The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
Melody Beattie
Born place: in St. Paul, Minnesota, The United States
Born date May 26, 1948
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“Straight-faced, Hamon said, "I'm honored to be working alongside someone with such expert woodland knowledge, superior battle skills, and an impressive beard."
Ven stroked his beard. "Indeed you are.”
― Sarah Beth Durst, quote from The Queen of Blood
“You know, I told Dad not to tell you about that whole near-death thing. I said that you'd overreact, and I was right."
There was a long pause, and then the shouting got somewhat louder.”
― Brittany Cavallaro, quote from The Last of August
“Berlin'de yalnızsınız değil mi?" dedi.
"Ne gibi? "
"Yani... Yalnız işte... Kimsesiz... Ruhen yalnız... Nasıl söyleyeyim... Öyle bir haliniz var ki..."
"Anlıyorum, anlıyorum... Tamamen yalnızım... Ama Berlin'de değil... Bütün dünyada yalnızım... Küçükten beri..."
"Ben de yalnızım..." dedi. Bu sefer benim ellerimi kendi avuçlarının içine alarak: "Boğulacak kadar yalnızım..." diye devam etti, "hasta bir köpek kadar yalnız..."
...
Şuna dikkat edin ki, benden herhangi bir şey istediğiniz gün her şey bitmiş demektir. Hiçbir şey anlıyor musunuz, hiçbir şey istemeyeceksiniz… Dünyada sizden, yani bütün erkeklerden niçin bu kadar çok nefret ediyorum biliyor musunuz? Sırf böyle en tabii haklarıymış gibi insandan birçok şeyler istedikleri için… Beni yanlış anlamayın, bu taleplerin muhakkak söz haline gelmesi şart değil… Erkeklerin öyle bir bakışları, öyle bir gülüşleri, ellerini kaldırışları, hulasa kadınlara öyle bir muamele edişleri var ki… Kendilerine ne kadar fazla ve ne kadar aptalca güvendiklerini fark etmemek için kör olmak lazım. Herhangi bir şekilde talepleri reddedildiği zaman düştükleri şaşkınlığı görmek, küstahça gururlarını anlamak için kafidir. Kendilerini daim bir avcı, bizi zavallı birer av olarak düşünmekten asla vazgeçmiyorlar. Bizim vazifemiz sadece tabi olmak, itaat etmek, istenilen şeyleri vermek… Biz isteyemeyiz, kendiliğimizden bir şey veremeyiz… Ben bu ahmakça ve küstahça erkek gururundan tiksiniyorum. Anlıyor musunuz? Sizinle bunun için dost olabileceğimizi zannediyorum. Çünkü halinizde o manasız kendine güvenme yok… Fakat bilmem… Ne kuzuların ağzından vahşi kurt dişlerinin sırıttığını gördüm…
...
Ben dünyadan ziyade kafamın içinde yaşayan bir insanım… Hakiki hayatım benim için can sıkıcı bir rüyadan başka bir şey değildir…”
― Sabahattin Ali, quote from Madonna in a Fur Coat
“You can be the most powerful witch in the land, but you will always have a weakness, and that will always make you believe you have no power when someone exploits it. There is no greater strength than the ability to understand and accept your own flaws.”
― Rin Chupeco, quote from The Bone Witch
“My people are condemned to wander this eternal twilight”
― Courtney Alameda, quote from Shutter
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