Bill Watterson · 255 pages
Rating: (17.6K votes)
“As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“Every time I've built character, I've regretted it.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think life should be more like TV. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothing, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?... Then again, if real life was like that, what would we watch on television?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“But for my own example, I'd never believe one little kid could have so much brains!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“My likely historical significance is a terrible burden. ~ Calvin”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do we drink COW milk?? Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said, 'I think I'll drink whatever comes out of these things when I squeeze 'em!'?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card.
HOBBES: From Susie Derkins!
CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine."
HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine!
CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this?
HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee!
CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross!
HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine!
HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie!
SUSIE: Hi, Calvin.
CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH!
SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope?
CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?!
HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
Bill Watterson
Born place: in Washington, D.C., The United States
Born date July 5, 1958
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“If he licked her there, she'd rob a bank for him.
When she felt his tongue glide across her throat, she quivered all over. Mick tightensed his hold on her, and the bastard did it again.”
― Jaci Burton, quote from The Perfect Play
“But, like most things in life, unless you really work at it, anger's a hard thing to hold on to.”
― Sarah Alderson, quote from Hunting Lila
“This was the era when gentlemen formally offered their services to "unprotected ladies" at the start of an Atlantic voyage.”
― Walter Lord, quote from A Night to Remember
“Children," Johanna drawled out. "They're such a joy. When you get married and have a family of your own, you'll understand what I'm saying. You are going to get married someday, aren't you, Keith?"
"Aye, m'lady," he answered. "Next summer as a matter of fact. Bridgid MacCoy has agreed to become my wife."
"Oh."
She couldn't quite hide her disappointment. She turned her gaze down the table and settled on Michael as a possibility.
He caught her staring at him. He smiled. She nodded. "Children," she began again. "They're wonderful, aren't they, Michael?"
"If you say so, m'lady."
"Oh, I do say," she replied. "When you get married, you'll understand. You do plan to marry someday, don't you, Michael?"
"Eventually," he answered with a shrug.
"Have you anyone in mind?"
"Are you matchmaking, m'lady?" Keith asked.
"Why would you think that?"
"I'll marry Helen when I'm ready," Michael interjected. "I've told her I will, and she agreed to wait."
Johanna frowned. The possibilities were becoming a bit limited. She turned to Niall.
"Children…" she began.
"She is matchmaking," Keith announced.
It was as though he'd just shouted the alarm that they were under siege. The soldiers literally jumped from their stools. They bowed to Johanna and left the room in the space of a single minute. She didn't even have enough time to order them back into their seats.”
― Julie Garwood, quote from Saving Grace
“The secret to kicking ass in dumbshit Hollywood... Every time you meet someone, make a fucking impression. Make them think you're the hottest shit in the world. Make them think they're gonna lose their job if they don't give you one. Look 'em in the eye, and never look away. Be confident and calm, be fucking bold.
That sounds more like the secret to kicking ass in life.
It is, but I was gonna wait and tell you that some other time. ”
― James Frey, quote from My Friend Leonard
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