Bill Watterson · 255 pages
Rating: (17.6K votes)
“As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“Every time I've built character, I've regretted it.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think life should be more like TV. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothing, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?... Then again, if real life was like that, what would we watch on television?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“But for my own example, I'd never believe one little kid could have so much brains!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“My likely historical significance is a terrible burden. ~ Calvin”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do we drink COW milk?? Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said, 'I think I'll drink whatever comes out of these things when I squeeze 'em!'?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card.
HOBBES: From Susie Derkins!
CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine."
HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine!
CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this?
HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee!
CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross!
HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine!
HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie!
SUSIE: Hi, Calvin.
CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH!
SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope?
CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?!
HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
Bill Watterson
Born place: in Washington, D.C., The United States
Born date July 5, 1958
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“Desecrate our temple, will you? Go ahead. However, I suggest you say goodbye to your cock before you do so.” Win! Not a challenge, not a challenge, not a fucking challenge. Please don’t let that be a challenge. He had a feeling the woman meant what she’d said. If he whipped out Stridy Monster to relieve himself, he’d lose Stridy Monster. And there was no greater tragedy than that. Ask anyone who’d been with him. “Uh,”
― Gena Showalter, quote from The Darkest Passion
“your excuses are so lame they’re limping,”
― Nora Roberts, quote from Happy Ever After
“I’ve seen you naked before, Maddie.”
Her mouth dropped open. “You have not seen me completely naked, thank you very much.”
His eyes glittered. “Actually, once before I have, when you were like five. You ran through the house buck-ass naked when you had chicken pox.”
“Oh, dear God, why do you remember these things?” She was going to drown herself, right here in the tub.”
― J. Lynn, quote from Tempting the Best Man
“He’s trying not to laugh. I tell him I would have doomed mankind for him, and he tries not to laugh.”
― Karen Marie Moning, quote from The Fever Series
“Although we are necessarily concerned, in a chronicle of events, with physical action by the light of day, history suggests that the human spirit wanders farthest in the silent hours between midnight and dawn. Those dark fruitful hours, seldom recorded, whose secret flowerings breed peace and war, loves and hates, the crowning or uncrowning of heads.”
― Joan Lindsay, quote from Picnic at Hanging Rock
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