Bill Watterson · 255 pages
Rating: (17.6K votes)
“As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“Every time I've built character, I've regretted it.”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“I think life should be more like TV. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothing, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?... Then again, if real life was like that, what would we watch on television?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“But for my own example, I'd never believe one little kid could have so much brains!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“My likely historical significance is a terrible burden. ~ Calvin”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take this milk. Why do we drink COW milk?? Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said, 'I think I'll drink whatever comes out of these things when I squeeze 'em!'?”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card.
HOBBES: From Susie Derkins!
CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine."
HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine!
CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this?
HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee!
CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross!
HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine!
HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie!
SUSIE: Hi, Calvin.
CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH!
SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope?
CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?!
HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!”
― Bill Watterson, quote from The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes
“It’s not a universal law or anything, but given the option in an empty bathroom, most folks are gonna pick the stall at the end to put maximum distance between them and anyone else who wanders in after them. It’s just good etiquette, people.”
― Amie Kaufman, quote from Gemina
“He said you were very dangerous."
"No more dangerous than anyone else who dares to speak the truth.”
― Jasper Fforde, quote from Lost in a Good Book
“Mishaque was a stouty blend of Irish "shrek" mixed with crazy Jafakain, his front was car dealing.”
― Saira Viola, quote from Slide, a Modern Satire on the Excess of Greed
“It feels incredible to be outside when I’m supposed to be inside. The sensation of freedom is intoxicating.
- Sara”
― Susane Colasanti, quote from When It Happens
“So last night I was watching TV and they had this movie on. I don’t know if you’ve seen it. This girl loves this guy on e-mail and hates the same guy in person? But she doesn’t know they’re both the same and when she realizes, she thinks she hates his guts. Only he gives this epic romantic monologue in the end and so she decides she can’t help but fall in love with him,” Nalini”
― quote from All My Life
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